Chapter 16

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Violet's POV

The ride back from the doctor's office is silent for the first ten minutes. None of us know what to say. I am definitely pregnant. I pull the ends of my sweater down, wanting to disappear.

"Do I have to keep it?" I ask my parents softly, breaking the silence.

"What?" Mum replies, her voice soft. She turns around to face me.

"Do I have to keep it?" I repeat, my arms crossed over my chest. "Are you gonna make me?"

"No," mum says firmly, "it's your choice."

"We're here for you either way, Violet," dad assures me, "It's what you decide you want to do."

"What if I decide wrong?" I choke out, terrified of both outcomes, "I'm not even sixteen yet. I don't know what to do." I try to fight off tears, tired of crying so much lately. I can see the pain in my parents' faces. They want to try to help me and give me advice, but they don't know what to say. I can't blame them. I wouldn't have the answer either if I was in their spot.

"V-"

"Which one will hurt the tour less?" I cut in, a new concern popping into my head.

"Hurt the tour? What are you talking about, honey?" Mum inquires, sounding confused.

"We've been being careful to not get any bad press lately because of the upcoming 5SOS tour. I'm gonna get bad press for being pregnant. Which will get less negativity; keeping it or not keeping it?"

"Please don't base your decision off of this tour," dad tells me sternly, resting his head against one hand as he drives.

"I don't want to hurt the band."

"The band will be fine. Violet, this is your life. 5SOS is not your life. This tour is not your life. Don't use them to make this decision," he pleads, sounding upset and a little urgent. I nod slightly.

"How are we going to tell the others?" I question, dreading everything about this topic.

"I'm not sure baby," mum answers, clearly upset that she can't help me more.

"What about Barry?" I add another question to the discussion. "He'll be so mad at himself. I can't do that to him. He's just starting to really truly get better. I can't mess that up for him."

"This isn't about Barry," mum argues, her voice shaking slightly. She runs her hand through her bright blue hair. "I know you're worried about what everyone else will think, but you need to do what's best for you. This isn't your fault, and you shouldn't feel like it is. The others will understand that." I nod, still unconvinced.

"Are we still visiting Barry today?"

"Do you want to?" Dad inquires, looking at me through the rear view mirror.

"Not really, but someone should. He really likes it when you two visit, even if he won't ever admit it," I tell them, my voice monotoned.

"Can you drop me off? I'll stay with him for a few hours," mum tells dad. He nods. "I'll have Luke pick me up. He's gonna be close to the rehab center later anyways."

"Will you tell Barry for me?" I call, messing with a hole in my jeans. "And Luke? I really don't want to." My voice cracks.

"Yeah," mum promises, "I will." I nod again. The car falls back into silence as we drive to the rehab facility.

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