Closet Thoughts (a short Joshler story) 🏳️‍🌈 ✔️

🌱5🌻🌷🌿

It was Saturday morning, and Tyler woke up early, feeling absolutely utterly dreadful. It'd been one of the worst nights in a very long time.

He could feel it in his bones and every other part of his body. He noticed his own tears that were dribbling down his cheeks already. This was gonna be a terrible day. He wished he hadn't woken up. He pulled his blankets up to his chin and rolled on his side, rolling up in the blanket. Then his phone buzzed and Tyler saw that it was the group chat of his friends.

Shit. He's supposed to hang out with his friends today, a little get together tonight at Josh's house.

He grabbed his phone and dialed Josh's number. Josh picked up the phone quickly.

"Hey Ty! I was actually just about to text you and ask if you'd want to come to my house earlier today? I know the others will be here a few hours after dinner but if you want we can have dinner together and we can prepare my home for the party together", Josh said.

Tyler just started crying when he heard Josh say that. "I can't come today", he told Josh. "I'm not feeling well", he added.

"Ty? What's wrong? Are you okay?" Josh asked worriedly. That worried voice was gonna be the death of Tyler one day.

"I don't know, Josh", he whispered. "Are you feeling sick?" Josh asked softly.

Tyler softly sighed. No. "Yeah", he replied. He wasn't feeling sick, though. His physical health was perfectly fine. It was definitely, a 100%, his mental health this time.

"I'm so sorry you can't come, Ty", Josh sadly said. "Don't cry, it makes me so sad to hear you cry, bestie", Josh softly said. "I'm sorry", Tyler whispered, followed by a soft sob.

"Is it your tummy again? That hurt you so badly last time", Josh asked. "Yeah, yeah it is", Tyler decided to reply. "It hurts really badly."

"I hope you'll get well soon, Ty. I'm sure everyone, and most of all I, will miss you so much tonight", Josh told him.

Tyler didn't know what to reply to that. He'd just lied to his best friend and crush so he didn't have to go to his house with their friends. He'd lied to him for the thousandth time.

"I'll see you later, J", Tyler softly spoke. "Take care, Ty, get well soon again! I'll miss you", Josh said.

Without another word, Tyler ended the call. He tossed his phone to the other side of the bed and buried his face in a pillow. When he ran out of air, he rolled back on his side. He took a deep breath but it didn't help. He hated himself for canceling so much. He could've just waited and see if he'd feel better later today, but he already canceled. He was too scared to tell Josh he was coming anyways tonight.

New tears rolled down his face. He could already feel that this was gonna be a day of crying over literally nothing important whatsoever. Like one day, where he just started to cry because his mom asked him what he wanted to have for dinner and he didn't know. Or when he was in bed and dropped his stuffy and he just felt so bad about it. It was gonna be one of those days and he was noticing it already.

He started crying over Josh asking him to hang out sooner today, then cried more when he remembered himself of what he'd said in the phone call.

Tyler hated himself. He hoped he would fall asleep and stay that way. He didn't wanna wake up anymore, at least for the day.

He closed his eyes and cried himself to sleep.

//

"Tyler, honey", Kelly said as she woke Tyler up. Tyler opened his eyes, feeling the sadness washing over him once again. "Hi momma", he softly replied.