Courtney
I was laying in bed. Listening to me and Allyssa favorite song. "Sing to me" by jhene aiko and her daughter.
I bit my lip. Trying my best not to cry again. Lyssa funeral was in 2 weeks, and I wasn't ready to see her in a casket.
I appreciated the talk me and kelly had, She told me so much stuff, and i was able to vent to her about things too.
She got my mind off of my sister for awhile. But something like this I can't just brush off.
I was grateful for the friends I had to. Warren, kelly, even Woowoo would check on me every hour or two.
My mom though, she's going threw it. Omar, Allyssa Dad, is trying to keep her up but I can read my mom like a book. This is hitting her hard.
Lyssa was her baby girl. Her little Roll dog.
Jr been going crazy too. First our dad now our baby sister. He keeps saying how he gone find whoever killed her, but we're trying to stop him from giving himself a case.
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for whoever killed my sister to die. Slowly and painfully. But for my brother to do it? I don't want to see him suffer in a jail cell. That'll only bring more pain to everyone.
A knock on a door snatched me out of my thoughts. I laid there, not wanting to get up. I knew it wasn't nobody important because my mom has a key, and anyone else would've called.
The person knocked again. "C'mon Courtney, it's Marc".
I furrowed my eyebrows and sat up slowly. I got up and went to the door, looking through the peephole. Indeed it was Marcus.
I sighed and opened the door. "What you want?"
"I just wanted to check up on you, and see how you doing". He said looking nervous.
Seeing Marcus did something to me. Of course he hurt me but at the end of the day I still loved this man at a point in my life.
"Well I'm not fine. My sister just died." I said as my heart stung at each word. I wasn't going to sugar coat and say I'm fine, because a closed mouth don't get fed.
He looked down at his feet and shook his head.
Marcus was Allyssa uncle, on her dad side. So I knew he was hurt to. Everyone was. Allyssa didn't deserve this.
She was an intelligent, pretty, respectful, and smart little girl. She didn't have attitudes. Never talked like she was grown. And gave good vibes all the time.
I never thought it'd be my sister gone , never.
I noticed a tear going down Marcus face. Which caused tears to come down mine. I pulled him to me for a hug, both of us needed one.
"She ain't deserve this shit man, she a little girl, she ain't even experience life all the way". He cried.
I put my head on his chest and rubbed his back. "It's so fucked up. All of this is just wrong". I cried.
We ended up on my bed, talking, and reminiscing about Allyssa.
Then, we fell asleep. His arms were wrapped around me, and we laid in a spooning position.
Life gets hard.
—————
That Monday.
I was in school today the whole school had a meeting. Which talked about gun safety, and violence. Bullying. Everything in that category.
I was chosen to be a speaker. And give a speech on these negative things.
