Sugar // Marliza

7

- Eliza -

I nervously paced the empty café, my phone resting in my hand as it rang. I had closed up about twenty minutes ago, but I still couldn't shake Maria from my mind. What is going on with me?

So I was calling Alexander. Because he'd know what to do, or at least, I think he would. Since we broke up last month, we've actually been closer than we were before. We talk all the time and still hang out, and I get to hear all about John from him. Alex is still denying the fact that he likes John, but it's so obvious. Who talks about someone that much but doesn't like them? Especially in the case of somebody as sweet as John.

"Hello?" Alex said, picking up his phone on the second to last ring. I breathed a sigh of relief before speaking.

"Hey, are you busy right now? I have... a situation." I said, my voice wavering slightly.

"No, I'm free. Is everything alright? Are you okay?" He asked, worry filling his voice.

"I'm fine, I'm not hurt or anything. I'm just... confused about something? And I really don't know what to do about it but I figured you could help." I answered. He exhaled deeply when I said I was okay and I heard shuffling in the background.

"Alright. I'll see you soon?" He asked. I told him yes and we ended the call. I took the subway home instead of walking, so I could get there much faster. Soon enough, I was knocking on Alex's door, a routine that wasn't anything new for us.

He let me in and I flopped onto his couch, staring up at the ceiling as I rubbed my eyes. He wandered off for a moment but came back with half a box of pizza and Cokes for both of us. He slid the Coke and a plate of pizza across the coffee table to my side, and I sat up from my position on the couch to eat it.

"So what's up?" He asked, sitting on the floor as he swallowed a bite of pizza. I sighed heavily and wrapped my arms around my knees, curling into myself and the side of the couch.

"Promise you won't judge me?" I found myself asking, even though I knew he wouldn't. He nodded.

"I won't judge. Pinky promise." He stuck his hand out and I laughed a little, wrapping my pinky around his before pulling away, feeling my smile slide off my lips.

"There's this girl who I hired, Maria... and she's really pretty and she makes me blush but I don't know why, because I'm straight?" I said, the ending coming out more as a question than a statement.

"Lizzie, you really think I was gonna judge you about that? I thought you like, stabbed someone or something!" Alexander said, smiling. I couldn't help myself from bursting out laughing. It felt good to laugh, to release the tension I'd been holding within myself for too long. We laughed together for a few more moments before he sighed contently and spoke up again.

"So... this Maria girl, do you think you like like her, or what? Tell me a little more about what you think or feel when you see her." He asked, resting his elbows on the table and his hands on his chin, like a small child.

"She's... beautiful. She always wears red, and it looks amazing against her caramel colored skin. Her eyes are like dark chocolate, and they look like they hide all the secrets to the world in them. They're sad, but they also shine with hope, you can tell. She's so witty and has the funniest jokes... but she could make the stupidest pun hilarious. She just has this charm that just goes with her everywhere, you know? I look at her when she comes into work and it makes my day so much better. Her presence could light up a whole room, honestly. Every time she's near me it makes anything bad go away. It's like... everything could be going wrong but when I'm with her, it all just... crumbles. The worlds biggest problems are no match for the happiness she makes me feel." I ramble, not even knowing how much I'm saying. By the time I'm finished, Alexander is staring at me with an almost awestruck face.

"Oh my god, Eliza. You're so in love!" He said, jumping up. I felt my face burn a deep red and for some reason, felt tears rise in my eyes. He noticed immediately and calmed down a little bit before rushing over to me, climbing on to the couch and sitting next to me.

"Hey, hey, don't cry! It's okay, shh..." He said, pulling me into his arms. I felt the warm tears slip down my cheeks. I felt so stupid to be crying, but... I'm scared. I don't know why I feel like this, especially after going through 20 years of my life thinking I'm straight. And then all this comes along and I tell Alex everything about Maria. I'm so conflicted and I don't know what to do.

So I just let myself cry into my best friends arms. He mumbled little words and sentences of reassurance to me, stroking my hair and rocking softly.

"It can be hard to come to terms with at first. It was for me, I know that for sure. I'm here to help you figure it all out. But for now, just let it all out, okay?" He said. I let myself cry, not bothering to wipe my tears or move to prevent them from falling onto Alexanders chest.

After a few minutes of crying, I finally calmed down and wrapped my arms around Alex.

"Thank you." I said softly, my voice sounding odd after just crying. He nodded and told me that's what friends are for.

I made my way back home, wearing a sweatshirt of Alexanders because he claimed it was too cold for me to only be wearing a T-shirt. I told him it was fine, but he insisted. He really did act like my mom sometimes.

I may have gone home with a few things I didn't leave with: red eyes from crying, Alex's sweatshirt, and a stomach full of pizza, but at least I went home without the pressure of my feelings for Maria weighing down on me quite as much.

a/n: here's another chapter written @ 1:45 am by yours truly. i've really gotta stop doing this, does anyone have any sleep tips? if so, please comment them or pm them to me or post them on my message board or something because i really need sleep