Heartbreak Hotel (Editing)

Chapter 40: Frozen

She read my expression and sucked her teeth. "Look, I went to the doctor a few weeks ago and found out I am pregnant."

Everything stopped. Froze into place as my eyes widened with disbelief." W-what?"

"Yeah, the doctor said that I'm about one month along."

"Are you telling me...that...that child is mine?" I pointed my shaking hands to my chest.

"That's the bad part. I don't who the father is. It could be you, but my boyfriend also maybe the father."

"Wait a minute, you cheated on him with me?"

"I was drunk."

"Is that you're only excuse? Do you have any idea what this makes me look like. If anyone finds out about this they will chew us out."

"Oh, please," She said shooing me off."Damon and I haven't even been dating that long."

"But have you slept with him?"

She nodded her head."I slept with him the night before I slept with you, and afterwards."

I began grinding my teeth together."Are you serious, Vanessa? So you don't know if that baby is his or mine?"

She shook her head."Nope."

"Vanessa..."

"What?"

"You are twenty years old, I would expect you to be more responsible than that."

She sucked her teeth."Look, don't you think I've been dealing with enough as it is. I'm just letting you know there's a chance that you might be becoming a father."

I couldn't describe the feeling I was having. It was a mixture of confusion, guilt, excitement. I've always wanted a child, but I wanted one from the woman I truly loved. Not from my ex girlfriend who I had a one night stand with and didn't even realize it until the next morning. I knew mother would kill me once she found out about this. This was against all the things that we believed. Premarital sex was one of them. At the moment I slowly began asking God for forgiveness." Look, you need to find if that baby is mine. I will take my place as a dad."

"And if it's not?"

"Then that's....Damon's responsibility."

" I probably won't know until it's born but I'll keep you posted." She walked up to me and hugged me.

"Does Damon know he may not be the father." I didn't know what is Damon was.

Her eyes fell to the floor." No, not yet. I thought it was easier for me to tell you first than him."

"Oh, my God. Vanessa, you're just askin' for drama."

"Okay, God!" I could tell she was becoming frustrated with me. She should've been frustrated with herself for being so careless. She rolled her eyes to the ceiling. and began to walk away.

I grabbed her arm, stopping her. "Nessa, you can't be so careless about this. This ain't no game, this is about bringing a child into this world."

"Okay, I know this." she said. "I'll let you know." With that she turned the other way and headed towards the exit. I turned back to the door remembering that Liyah was still in there. I had to face her with the news Nessa had just given me. I instantly didn't know what I wanted to do. I pushed the door open to the sound of her playing mindlessly on the piano. "Just give me a reason..." She was singing softly to herself. "Just a little bit's enough...Just a second we're not broken just bend...and we can learn to love again..."  She stopped and began humming the lyrics over again. She didn't even notice I was there. I closed my eyes and exhaled placing a mask over my face. "It's in the stars..it's still written on the scars on our hearts...That we're not broken..." I knew if she knew about this she would be crushed. I sat down next to her. She stopped in the middle song.

"What did she want?"

"Uh, she was just reminding about something I have to do." I said slowly, without making any contact with her. I could feel her eyes on my neck as if she knew I was lying. I wouldn't be surprised if she did. We knew each other so well.

"Oh, okay. Quincy called and said he's on his way and that we can go ahead and get started.

"Okay."

I was relieved that she believed me but at the same time I was guilty. She was going to eventually find out and when she did she was going to chew me out for lying to her. That thought made me realize that she would probably be more hurt that I lied to her than she would be if she found out I had possibly gotten another girl pregnant. Even though we weren't together it was clear that we still loved each other. That was very clear.

Liyah's POV

I felt off as I walked back into the hotel room later on that day. I don't know where it had came from, or why I felt that way. I just had a feeling that...either something bad has happened or something bad was going to happen. It was my instincts. It was always a curse and a blessing wrapped up in one. It was a growing feeling that started off small but grew as the whatever it was that was going to happen became closer. I didn't know what this instinct was about. It just came out of of the blue as I said goodbye to Michael and Quincy for the day. It just began to form in the pits of my stomach as I drove down the Los Angeles highway that night. I didn't think about much. I didn't think about Michael or Vanessa's visit. I was too busy trying to fight the feeling.

I placed my bag down on the couch and walked into the kitchen where Liana was washing her hands. I sat down at the stool and grabbed an orange from a basket that sat in the middle of the island."Have you heard from Sasha or Danielle today?" I asked. It was I question that I seem to ask every day now. I was becoming desperate off a conversation with my mother. I hadn't spoken to her in two years. Haven't seen her in two years, haven't heard her voice in two years. It was like she never existed, like she was dead...disappeared into an oblivion.

Liana turned around slowly. Her eyes were red from crying. "Liana?" I asked. My instincts where going wild now along with the beat of my frightened heart. I stood up and walked over to her. "What's wrong?" I knew something had happened.

"Sit down, Aaliyah." She softly pushed me back on the stool.

"What's going on, is Sasha okay?"

"Sasha's fine," She closed her eyes and sighed. "Sasha went back to Harlem...she got a phone call from authorities. They found your mother....dead....in her apartment..." The orange that was in my hand fell to the floor. I heard it roll under the table.

My heart was breaking, crumbling into billions of pieces. The air around was closing in and I could barely breathe. I was stuck. Frozen. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what to think. I didn't know what to feel. I just didn't. I didn't know what to do. I was completely numb.

"They said it was due to aids-related complications and based on her health records, she knew she had the disease...she's been dead for...a month now."

Still I sat there, emotionless.

"We'll have to go for the funeral later on this week. I'm so sorry, Li...I'm so sorry..."

Her voice faded as I began tuning her out. I wanted no more....nothing....