Chapter 48

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Pain of mind is worse than pain of body.




Giara's POV.

"G, what do we do now?" Alec's voice echoed in my ear.

"Hmm, Nick?"

"Yes?"

"Are there any cameras on the street near the house?" I asked scratching my right eyebrow.

"Yep."

"Hacked them and come back. We can keep an eye from home."

"Okay." He said.

"I'll leave soon. Meet you at our house." With that I hanged up. I looked up to see Marcus, Rina and Sophie climbing in the car as Jay patiently waited. They waved their byes and went off. As soon as they left Jay rushed inside. What's the rush about? I thought as I made my way to my bike. I climbed on and speed of to the house.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"G. Wake up." Someone shook me.

"Huh?" I straighten my back stretching my arms. "What time is it?" I asked as I rubbed my eyes.

"It's8:30." Jack said. "Were you awake all night?" He asked.

"Hmm. When I saw time it was 8:00. I took a nap I guess."

"So did he come to house?"

"Nope. I don't think so he will. Plus his supposed daughter went to her hostel." I said getting up from the wooden chair I was sitting on. "Ahh, my butt hurts."

"You should have used a different chair." He said shaking his head. "Go wash up. Alec made breakfast before he left." He pushed me towards my room.

"Okay." I yawned and dragged my feet towards my room to wash up. I feel so tired. Ahh, I need tea. I could do anything just to drink a cup of tea."Jaaccckk! Can you make me a cup of tea?" I shouted from my room hoping he could hear because I bet my shout was not exactly what would you calla shout. It was as same as speaking to a person who was just beside you.

"I am making tea!" He shouted. God bless his soul. I thought as I walked into my bathroom. Splashing my face with cold water I sighed. I thought about what I did yesterday. What is wrong? To shout at him like that? It's true he lied but I didn't have shout at him like that right? He is older than me. I should have talked calmly. Ugh! Mum would be so disappointed right now. I am sorry mom that I lost my control again. Gosh, why I am like this? I am slammed my hand on the marble counter. If commander come to know about what I did, he would be furious. Its nothing new though. He's always like that whether I do any good or bad he has to criticise me always. He never had anything good to say about. I don't think I ever got a compliment from him. Compliment? Pff..what are you talking about G? You don't even remember him playing with you when you were a kid. He was never home. Just you and mum.

I bitterly chuckled and brushed my teeth. What's the point in pitying myself? I think about those things, break my knuckles, slamming them somewhere then I bandage them taking it to square one. That's my life cycle. Spitting the water I stared at myself in the mirror. The very familiar cold blue eyes. Just like his. I dropped my head and turned around walking towards shower room. I need to stop pitying myself.

"You are here." Jack said as he fixed me a plate.

"I need tea first." I said taking a seat on stool. He handed me the cup. "Ah thanks." I sipped the steaming hot tea which burned my tongue a little but its nice. I like my tea hot.

"So what happened yesterday?" He asked. I sighed and recited everything.

"I am going to apologise when I get there." I mumbled chewing the bread.

"You do know that if commander finds out he would be furious." Jack said.

"It's not like he never is." I shrugged. "I don't care what he thinks. Any way I am going to apologise. I know that, that was no way of talking to him like but I was so angry that he lied. Jack we lay our lives to protect them."

"I know it was wrong of him but still you should not give into your anger."

"I know, I know."

"Now leave it, eat your breakfast you need energy since you didn't get any sleep." Jack ordered point his spoon at me. I simply nodded and continued chewing on bread.

"Good morning." Nick said as he walked into the kitchen.

"Morning." Jack greeted.

"Where were you?" I asked looking up at him.

"Um I went to head quarters." He answered as he opened the fridge door searching for something.

"Hmm." I hummed.

"So did anyone come back to that house?" Nick questioned opening the cap of milk gallon.

"You better take a glass to drink it." Jack warned narrowing his eyes at Nick.

"Jeez fine." He mumbled opening the shelf in search of glass.

"No, no one did. The girl went to her hostel." I said gulping down the tea and standing up. "I'll be leaving. Nick keep an eye on the house for me." He nodded. "And ha! Get me information on that girl, in the picture." With that I walked out.

"Morning baby." I said dusting her seat before climbing on and speeding off to Jay's mansion.

"Good morning Ms. Edwards." George greeted as soon as I walked in.

"Morning George. Is Mr. Olsen home?" I asked.

"Yes he is in the office w-"

"Okay thanks I'll get going, I need to talk him before I leave for school." I waved as I made my way towards Mr. Olsen's office. I knocked on the door without waiting for him to answer I opened the door. "Mr. O-Oh!" I mid stopped when I saw someone was already there. Thank god they didn't notice that I walked in their meeting. I slowly pulled the door close.

"Giara can be hasty." Giara? That's my name. Why are they talking about me? I opened the door just enough to peek in. Is- is that commander? What is he doing here?"

"I'm sorry on her behalf. She has a problem with controlling her anger. Its been like this since she was a kid. Quite a brat to say. Always did what she wanted, never listens to anyone." Commander said chuckling.

"No it's fine Nathan you don't have to apologise. It was my mistake anyway. I should have never kept my past hidden from your team. It just that I never thought that it would affect my family after 20 years." Mr. Olsen said.

"Yes and she should have understood that. She just acts like brat. Like she knows everything. I don't know what's wrong with her attitude. I tried hard to discipline her but nah she's stubborn. It would have been easier if I had a son. You are lucky you have a son Blake." What?

"What are you talking about? Yes I am glad that I have a son but having a daughter like Giara would be gratefully. She's quite a young lady." Mr. Olsen said smiling.

"Oh no she's a headache. You don't know what I have to deal with everyday. She is like ticking bomb waiting to just blow up. And I am sure that bomb blew up in here yesterday. I don't get where did I go wrong in her bringing up. She don't even know the 'r' of respect. I am so fed up with her. I really wished I had a son so he would be perfectly trained. I am sure he would have made me proud instead of disappointment and embarrassed."

"Nath-"

"I partly blamed the part that she lost her mother at young age."

"Or you could just blame yourself commander." I said walking into the room. I could take it all, everything he has to say about me but not about mum. He doesn't have any right to blame her.

"Giara." They both stood up as I walked in.

"Or you can blame the time that I waited for my dad, every evening to play with him but he never did. Or you can blame that time when I wanted my daddy to hug and kiss me good night. Or you could blame that time when I cried alone when mom left us!" I shouted. Tears were running my cheeks. "You can say all you want to about me commander. That I am a disappointment. That I am the embarrassment that you never wanted in your life. You can blame me all you want but don't you dare blame my mum!"

"Giara stop it." He glared.

"No you stop it. She was there. She was there with me all time. Reading me stories, kissing me good night, hugging me when I felt sad, comforting me when other kids kept bullying me, calling me her princess. Where were you that time huh? Where were you when there was parents day in school? Where were you when I gave a speech about how I wanted to be like my brave dad. Where were you?!? She was there cheering for me the loudest. Where were you d-dad?" I sobbed.

"Giara." He said walking towards me but lifted my hand telling him to stop.

"Tell me where were you? Answer me." I asked looking at him. "Oh wait, of course you were busy working right?" I bitterly chuckled. "Whenever I asked mom where is dad she would always reply with he is working. He is busy fighting bad guys. I always believed her. But now to think about it, I don't think you were busy working. You just hated me because I was girl and not a boy."

"Giara no-"

"You hated me so much that you couldn't even look at my face. You hated my existence. No, not hated, you hate my existence. You hate that I am your daughter. You hate that your name is carried on by a girl. Why? Is it so bad to be born as a girl in this world? Is it my fault that I am born as girl? No commander! No!" I cried. "I wished I was born as a boy, just to feel what it is to be loved by your dad." I said wiping my tears and turned towards Mr. Olsen who standing looking at us in disbelief. "Mr. Olsen, I am sorry about my behaviour yesterday." I dropped my head in shame. That's what I am.

"Giara you don't need to apologise. It was my mistake in first place." Mr. Olsen said. I can hear pity in his voice. I don't want his pity, I don't want anyone's pity.

"I am sorry you had to see this but I request you to not pity or see me indifferent light." I said.

"I-" He started but I cut him off.

"I'll take my leave Mr. Olsen. Commander." I saluted and turned walking out of the office.

"Giara wait!" Mr. Olsen called but I kept walking. I want to be out of here. I rushed then I remember whatever it is I still have to complete my job. So I walked towards kitchen to see Mrs. Olsen serving breakfast to Jay. I cleared my throat before greeting.

"Morning Mrs. Olsen, Jay." Mrs. Olsen greeted back and Jay ignored, busy typing something in his phone.

"Oh come here Giara have breakfast with us." She said placing a extra plate.

"Oh no Mrs. Ol-"

"Mom don't. She don't deserve to sit with us." Jay said.

"Jay! What is wrong with you?" Mrs. Olsen scolded. "Shut your mouth and swallow your food. You are getting late for school." She hissed at him.

"I am not going to school." He shrugged still typing something in his phone.

"What nonsense is this?" She shouted.

"Giara!" Mr. Olsen walked into the kitchen with Commander following behind.

"Blake what is going on here?" Mrs. Olsen asked as her husband rushed in calling me name.

"Let me elaborate to you mom." Jay stood from his seat and walked towards me. "Miss Giara Edwards here is stuck up bitch." He said smiling sarcastically, making Mrs. Olsen gasp.

"JAY!!" She shouted.

"What? It's true. Right dad?" He turned towards his dad. I don't know was his expression was they were behind me and I didn't dare to turn or lookup. "Oh what happened Miss Giara Edwards? Where did the feminist in you go? Where did the Giara go who used to held her head up in pride."

"Jay stop it." Mr. Olsen said.

"Why dad? Let mom know what her best friend's daughter is really like. You know mom what she did? She dare to shout at dad. Her employer, who pays her." He said and then grabbed me by my arms. I clenched my fist by myside. "How dare you bitch! Who do you think you are to shout at my dad like that? Oh wait I know who you are. You are some girl with anger issues. I know now, why your dad hates you."

"JAY I SAID STOP IT!" Mr. Olsen shouted. He flinched releasing me from his grip. I was shaking. I need to leave, right now.

"I-I-" He stuttered.

"Since you are not going to school today. I'll take my leave, I have something to do." I said and turned, running outside the house. I could hear their shouts calling for me, telling me to stop but I kept running. I quickly climbed my bike and speed off to somewhere, where I could let it all out. I could feel tears running down my cheeks. I sniffed. I speed up wanting to numb it. Though my face was numb from the sharp wind I could still feel the pain.

I pulled brakes as soon as I reached the familiar place.

I parked my bike and climbed off the bike and walked towards the trees, deep into the forest near my place. And then I finally let it out. I cried, I screamed, I sobbed as I kept punching the tree bark till my knuckles bleed. I kept punching it. I felt my hands go numb.

"Mum, I miss y-you." I sobbed sliding down the tree on my knees. "Mum please help me. I-I can't take i-it a-anymore." I whispered as I saw black dots.













A/N:

Guys to be honest, I cried during writing this part. That's all I have to say. I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter and felt the emotions. Just don't forget to leave your comments, vote and to share it with your pals.

Love,
Alba 💜

Love,Alba 💜

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