Chaos

"He's gone."

Napalunok ako sa aking narinig. I didn't even get to see him for the last time.

Tinalikuran ko ang babae. Dali-dali akong lumabas. Ayoko nang makarinig pa ng kahit ano, ayaw ko nang marinig ang hirap na dinanas niya bago mawala.

It hurts... So much.

His smiles, his eyes.

I can never forget my greatest love.

-'*'-

It started when I worked for this hospital.

I was a doctor when I met him. I was a gastroenterologist, more specifically.

"What's the diagnosis?" He smiled weakly at me. Napapikit siya nang maramdaman niyang muli ang kirot sa bandang t'yan. Ngumiti pa rin siya.

"I hope it won't be anything too severe for me too handle." He winked, then chuckled. "People expect a lot from me."

Hindi ko kayang sabihin sa kanya ang kalagayan niya. I've been through cases like this and trust me, I'm scarred because of their reactions.

"Primary Liver Cancer, Stage 2."

Slowly, his smile fades.

This. Is. So. Hard.

Telling your patients they have this disease is so heartbreaking.

"You're joking, right?" Tears fell from his eyes. I shook my head.

"You'll heal. There's still hope." I assured him.

"No! This can't be!" Then, he started to yell and weep like he lost everything. I comforted him. It's my first time seeing a guy cry like this is and no, I can't take this.

I looked at his eyes. His hazelnut colored eyes. They're beautiful. I'm suddenly dazed.

"I'll help you. I'll be honest there's only a 31% chance that you'll heal, but I'll help you overcome this. I'll do everything to make you heal. I'll financially help you." I continuously said. I don't know why I said that. I just want to make him feel better.

"I have money. I'm fine." Tears are still falling from his eyes. He stopped yelling. I patted his back. "Thank you."

He stood up and wiped his tears.

"Mr. Vesarte, are you okay now? Would you like--"

"I would like you to be my personal doctor. Don't tell anyone about my condition. I'd like to start the medications right away."

I nodded.

"Sure, we can start tomorrow if you'd like."

"Tomorrow is fine. Tomorrow night, in fact. I still have to manage the company." He fixed his clothes. "I still have to, even in this state. They're all counting on me."

"Can I know the company name?" I'm still worrying about him, financially. Baka naman kasi nahihiya lang siya sa'king humingi ng tulong.