Open When... - A Malec FanFiction.

.:Chapter Thirteen:.

Warning: This chapter contains self-harm and suicidal thoughts. If these things make you uncomfortable, do not read.

Magnus was sat back at the desk, the box of letters sitting on it, slightly to the left. He was doing some Purgiatic translations for a client, a warlock that didn't know the language. He got bored quickly and went into the bathroom, wanting to do his hair and then go to a party and get drunk. His mind was flooded with Alec. Alec at the park. Alec in their bed. Alec in the kitchen. In his office. At a party. The warlock shook his head and the thoughts dispersed. He focused on his hair.

The warlock had put the final touches of his outfit when his thoughts turned dark. He wanted to get back to Alec, to be with him, more than anything in his 400 years. He could try necromancy... no. He shook his head. That would only get him jailed and then he'd never even get to see Alec. Which left one solution. Magnus' eyes drifted, coming to rest on the razor by the sink. He couldn't... could he? There was nothing left for him here, he could spend the rest of his days with his blue-eyed shadowhunter. His legs unconsciously moved towards the blade. He knew he shouldn't but his mind was telling him otherwise. Magnus picked up the razor and removed the blade. He fiddled with it for a moment, turning around between his fingers, before resting it on the skin on his left wrist, just below the joint. Magnus pressed down, letting the blade cut his skin.
"Hey Magnus..." he heard a voice and footsteps coming towards the open bathroom door.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!?" He recognised the voice now. Jace. He had given the blonde a key, telling him to come over when he needed time away from everything.

Jace ran forward, snatching the blade out of the Warlock's hand, throwing it back onto the counter, away from him. He slowly walked towards Magnus, who was staring into space and seeming distant. He couldn't feel the pain or the mood slowly dripping down his wrist and into the floor. Jace's voice sounded as if it was underwater. The blonde snapped him out of it when he touched Magnus' bleeding wrist. Sparks flew from his fingers and into the cut, healing it, although the scar was still there. Jace sat down on the bathroom floor next to him and put a hand on his knee.
"Why...?" The shadowhunter asked quietly.
"I want Alec." He muttered in reply, his voice distant and upset.
"Doing... this isn't a way to get him back, Mags..."
"I can't live without him Jace... he was the only thing keeping me sane, keeping me alive."
"You may not have him... but you have us. Me, Izzy, Cat, Clary, Simon, Jocelyn, Luke... everyone."
"It doesn't feel like it, Jace... It really doesn't." Magnus sighed and wrapped his arms around the blonde, biting his face in Jace's chest. Jace returned the embrace, stroking Magnus' hair softly.
"Please... next time, just think. Think of all the people that need you and realise that we need to go." Magnus nodded and Jace let go.
"Ice cream and movies?" Jace asked and grinned as Magnus gave a small smile and snapped a pint of their favourite ice creams into existence, Phish Food for Jace, coffee for himself. The blonde grinned and went into the lounge, putting Mulan into the DVD player. Magnus sat next to him on the couch and they watched it together, sharing their ice cream.