How The Hell?!

Losing and Winning

"Babe? Are you sure you're alright? I know you're upset, but it's been six months." He rolled his eyes as he snuggled closer to the pillow making no attempt to respond to his boyfriend. They both knew why he was still in bed. You see, almost ten months ago, Matt had found out that he was pregnant, both him and his boyfriend Tom thrilled by the good news. The good news didn't last long however......

(Flashback)
Matt sat up quickly, his left hand moving to clutch at his middle, the small bump suddenly paining him greatly. He wanted to curl up and die. Reaching his right hand over he shook Tom's shoulder. Only a few moments later the lamp was on and he felt a pair of hands on him, left on his cheek and right on his shoulder.

"Gingersnap? What's wrong?" It was obvious that Tom was trying to keep a calm demeanor, he could feel his boyfriend's hands shaking from where they were on him.

"S-something feels wrong-" Nearly screaming in pain, Matt felt something splash below him, a strong metallic sent permeating the air. He felt the hand leave his shoulder, the shockwaves of pain forcing his eyes to shut.

"D-don't look down love. I-I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

(Flashback end)

It was upsetting to think about. The fact that they had lost their first child so early on. It had set Matt into a depression after he had figured it out, he had refused to leave the bed after that point and only did so when he needed to use the restroom or at four in the morning to grab something small to eat. Tom was trying his best. He would make attempts to cheer up his only recently depressed boyfriend. Nothing seemed to work but it didn't stop him from trying.

“Do you want to talk about it? I know it still hurts but I'm here for you….” Hearing a soft voice through the door, Tom opened the door slowly, waiting to get yelled at and have something be thrown at him. But that never happened. He walked in to find Matt sitting up on the bed, his hair a mess and his face red and blotchy from crying. Quickly crossing the room, he sat on the bed next to Matt, pulling the ginger onto his lap and into a warm hug. If he weren't thinking straight he would think that there was a bag of bones in his arms.

“Shhh you're alright love. I'm right here with you.” Holding his ginger close, he rocked back and forth in an attempt to soothe the other. It was quiet for a while longer, neither having a thing to say.

“It still hurts Tom. Everything hurts.” Matt’s voice was soft and showed that he was at risk of crying again.

“I'm sorry. I don't know how to take the pain away. We can always try again when you're ready to love.” Watching as the other nodded, Tom kissed the back of his jaw. It was a few more moments before he heard a soft whimper from his arms. Turning Matt’s head so they would be face to face, Tom brushed oily ginger hair out of his boyfriend’s eyes.

“What's wrong?”

“Something feels wrong. I feel like I-I had something bad. Like my insides are trying to come out.” He felt something drip from him, the fluid spreading over Tom’s lap where he sat. Hearing another louder whimper leave his throat, he flinched and clutched down towards his gut. Feeling Tom move his legs and glance down at the fluid covering his thighs, he had a sickening sense of deja vu. He was dying, he knew it. He hadn't been taking care of himself properly and he was going to bleed out and die leaving Tom alone. He knew he was dumb but this just proved how stupid he was. It was probably for the better that he died.

“I'm taking you to the hospital right now. I'm not going to lose you I swear.” Feeling his frail body being lifted into strong arms, he let the blankets and towels be wrapped around him before he was placed into the passenger seat of Edd's car. Watching through dulled blue hooded eyes as Tom jumped into the driver's seat, he could barely keep his consciousness.