No more dream

15: Busy week (2)

Jungkook's POV

It was just all too strange for this incident to be a mere coincidence that Jung Eunbi happened to bump into Choi Yuna so that Taehyung could take her away. What is their plan exactly? He did tell me that he was going to break her heart.

..Because I broke Jung Eunbi's? She broke mine! She made me like this! She gave me that mischievous smile once Taehyung and Choi Yuna left. Out of all the people, she looked directly at me. She was planning for this to happen.

I wanted to leave; follow Choi Yuna, and protect her for some reason. But I can't. I'm trapped on this chair with Jung Eunbi's smile that put me in a trance.

-

I was in the classroom with the rest of the students and the two empty desks that are left conspicuous. Choi Yuna and Taehyung. What did he do..? Murmurs started filling the room as I see them walking together.

"Omo, Taehyung and Choi Yuna would be so cute together!"

"I know right?" I sincerely wanted to shut them up. Word by word goes ringing through my ears and stinging in my head. They walk into the classroom and Hwang Eunbi walks up to Choi Yuna.

She tells Choi Yuna something, I couldn't quite hear from my distance from them, and sat down. I felt myself glaring at Taehyung.

He was smirking, that same reaction that Jung Eunbi had with me; staring straight at me with a look of no good intentions.

In my head, it was as if I heard him saying, "I told you already. She will be mine."

As they both sat down, I saw something sparkling on Choi Yuna's wrist.

I see a bracelet that I've never seen her wear before. It angered me further when I came to the conclusion that Taehyung bought her that item.

What if he bought her more things that I don't know about?

-

After class was over, I packed my stuff and started cleaning. Choi Yuna forgot that she had cleaning duty and settled her stuff down. Did she just.. completely forget about me too? The teacher and the students all left and it was just us two standing in the classroom with cleaning utensils.

We were cleaning the chalkboard and dusting out the chalk. There was a long moment of silence. I didn't want to go out on her, but I ended up doing so. "If Jung Eunbi does something like that ever again, come to me."

My overprotective side shows as I stare at her sternly. I still wonder even now, why am I doing this? My heart.. is it really pumping fast for her? I feel that.. it's not. It's just my pride holding on.

But what am I proud of? Am I just trying to prove Jung Eunbi wrong? Because of what she has done in the past, do I just want her to experience what pain I'm going through? With my pride, I try to convince myself that I don't like Choi Yuna.

"But I.. don't want to involve anyone because it'll make things worse for you or that person." She replies as I raise my voice in disbelief.

"But you can involve Taehyung?" She stops for a moment and looks at me.

"What do you know?" She asks with a irritated tone. "I didn't involve him, he was just there! Just assume that I freely invited him when you don't even know what actually happened."

My heart starts to drop and squeeze out of pain. But.. I don't like her.

So why.. why does my heart ache? Why am I hurt by the words that come out of her mouth? Why?!

"What do I know? I know what happened because I was there. Taehyung pulled you away when Jung Eunbi was trying to make you do something!" I cried out, "You even went somewhere with him!"

"How do you know I went somewhere with him or not? Were you following us?" I pulled her arm. "Explain this then!" I show her wrist that inherits the bracelet.

"You never wore this before!" I rose my voice in annoyance, trying to prove my point.

"Why should it matter what I wear? Wouldn't you wear something a friend gave you?" She asks, trying to put sense into me.

"What is with you?" She asks in a broken, soft tone. "Why are you doing this?"

Those words echo in my mind. What is with me? I'm agitated. Why are you doing this? That question.. has many answers.

I don't know which answer is actually correct. My pride. My pain. Wanting to prove them wrong. And.. I like..

"I.. don't know." I finally mutter. I do know, but I don't know which answer is the right one that clearly expresses my feelings.

I want her to come to me when there's something wrong, but when it comes to me going to her, I start to just freak out. What a hypocrite I am.

We continued to clean to silence, no words able to make up for the silence made.

-

A half an hour later, we finish cleaning. We packed up and she quickly went out of the classroom without bidding goodbye. I took my things and went after her.

"Choi Yuna." I call her name as I walk to her, grab her shoulder, and face her towards me.

Her eyes were watering.

"You do know why you're doing this, but you choose not to tell me." She states in the same broken tone as earlier. "It hurts, you know? I don't know why, but when you argue with me, it makes me feel hurt."

"Hah, what am I saying?" A tear falls down her cheek. She wipes it and sniffles. "I'll get going now."

She turns and starts to walk away as I feel myself shifting towards her.

I hug her from behind. "Mianhae." I say gentle, yet firm. "I'm really sorry. I'm just.. not ready to tell you the purpose of why I think I'm doing this for." I really am not ready to tell her.

For some reason, I feel as if she'll just leave if I tell her. She'll be hurt, or she'll become involved in the situation. Who am I kidding? I already involved her in it.

I involved her by 'liking her'.

"Ara, I would feel the same too. I understand." She quietly responds.

-

We get out of stop five together because I live in the area of stop five as well. I want to walk her home, but she wants time to herself. But the possibilities of how it can be dangerous since it's getting late comes to mind.

When I got home, with the same empty house, I went up to my room. I changed and I studied some of the things we have to study for. But I couldn't think. My mind was filled by what happened today.

I was reflecting on what happened. My pain was somewhat connected to my pride and wanting to prove them wrong. I figured out after contemplating for a long time and came to an answer.

Jealousy. It's not the kind of jealousy that you would have when you envy someone. It's the jealousy of.. when you taking liking of someone. A special, particular person.

And for me, that person is.. no! I shake my head. It's not that, is it really? I don't want to admit it and I think about the worse possible outcome for me. If you like Choi Yuna, you will be hurt again. And you're already hurt.

You would hurt her too if you try to become close to her. Those two would make her life miserable because of you being alive. I lay in my bed twisting and turning. ..Or is it Jung Eunbi that my heart still beats for?

The only person that just popped into my head that just increases my pain was eomma. What would she do at a time like this? I'm suppose to be studying; living for her.

But.. it's not the same as her being alive herself; having her own life. These thoughts start to scare me.. and I just want to hide and come out when it's all over.

But it seems like it's endless.