A Little Bit Of Joy | ✔

Chapter Twenty Three : The Boy's Guardian

The rest of the day moved slowly. Logan stupidly insisted to work in the shop because he wanted to get paid, so grandpa let him for a while before finally kicking him out. Apparently, Logan had two jobs- one was working here in the flower shop and the other had to do something with the advertisement in the night. He wouldn't get paid for eleven days [even though if I would convince my grandpa to pay him-he would, but Logan refused this charity staunchly].

"I'll have to use some money from my savings to pay the bills," he said almost ruefully and my heart went out for him. He had so many responsibilities at such a young age. "Anyway, I do have good savings from my earlier jobs and I need that only for a two-year community college before I turn twenty-one and transfer to the university."

"Oh, that's great! I'm so happy you got real plans. Will you get some sort of funds when you turn twenty-one?" I asked and he stretched himself on my bean bag. I watched the tension in his long legs easing, his shirt riding up a little as he yawned. If he didn't skip showers, combed his messy hair occasionally and slept properly so there would be no evident bags underneath his eyes, he would look really good. He was skinny with no flaunting biceps, but his features were prominent. He had intense sea-coloured eyes, a slender nose and adorable dimples which made his smile contagious.

"Yeah, inheritance after I turn twenty-one," he replied and shifted on his seat. We were both getting restless because we were aimlessly hanging around in my room to pass time till dinner. I extended my hand from the other end of my bed and reached for the laptop kept on the nightstand.

"How're your sessions with the counsellor going?" I asked as I opened my laptop and typed the password.

"It's all good," he said tiredly, but I could see the improvement in him. He had started to talk more, smile often. Seeking help from someone reliable was always fruitful even if the problem was minuscule. He didn't have an adult in his life so he shared his problems with his school counsellor or called the suicide hotline once. Sometimes, it was easy to admit to a stranger than to a person we knew and loved because of our fear of being judged and loathed by them for the rest of our lives. "Joy, I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?" My attention darted from the laptop screen to him in a fraction of a second and he looked remorseful.

"For ruining your summer," he said woefully, shame evident on his face and I shook my head. "No, Joy. I have been taking up all your time, I'm really sorry. You don't deserve to babysit me--- "

"Logan, don't be ridiculous. I'm not babysitting you," I cut him off, but by the look on his face, I knew what he meant. I had only this summer to properly live-where I could walk, run or ride on my bicycle without any worries of passing out due to exhaustion. My last summer and here I was trying to solve the problems of some boy. But to me- it wasn't some boy. It was Logan, the boy who acted tough, but just a layer underneath was kind and compassionate. The boy whose mere presence warmed my soul. The boy whose crying shattered my own heart. The boy whose smile made me happy. "Everyone nowadays doesn't share their problems with me because of my disease, but I do want to know. I want to be a part of your joy and even your sorrow, I want to help you, but they don't want to worry me and I get it. I do, but . . . "

"What?" Logan rasped as he leaned forward on the beanbag, joining his hands.

"Don't get me wrong Logan, I'm not with you only because I get to help you or something, ugh I stink at explaining. I-I'm not here with you because I can make your problems my own, it's just so much more than that." I felt agitation bubbling inside me, words failing to tumble out of my mouth.

"It is?"

"Yeah," I said quietly. "With you Logan, I-I seem to forget about cancer or anything like that. You aren't careful around me and it's kind of refreshing. I feel normal and as if I'm just living- like I'm going with the flow. It's as if this path was chosen and this summer is the only kind of summer I always wished for- minus the bad moments of course. This adventure- it's getting me and I-I like it."