More Than a Coincidence (An Ereri/Riren fanfiction)

Chp 3

Dad's words take away hope but fill me with willpower. It's settled then I'm coming out to my friends, tomorrow.

- - - - The next morning - - - - 

I slump out of bed eyes still puffy as the sun starts to peek through my window. I walk out into the hallway and into the bathroom. I splash cold water on my face trying to wake myself up.

I wasn't able to fall asleep last night at all. I was too busy worrying and overthinking like I always do about how my friends will react to the news I'm about to share.

I take a moment to observe myself in the mirror. Damn, I look like shit. I focus on my face. I see deep dark circles under my sunken, blood shot eyes. The pink dryness for some odd reason makes my turquoise iris pop. I take a step back and study my slim torso. I'm pretty thin. I'm not that muscular but I have some abs and I'm proud of them especially 'cause I don't work out. I notice my ribs poking out on my sides, it can't hurt to eat a little more.

I head downstairs and make a bowl of cereal. It's 6:50, dad should be coming down any minute. Soon after I hear the floor boards creak and I look up to see my dad's surprised face. "What are you doing up so early? It's not even 7 yet." he asks shocked to see his son up before he was.

I quickly come up with a lie and look down at my lap, "I woke up for some reason and I couldn't fall back asleep so I just got up". I start playing with the remaining cinnamon squares floating in the white milk. I swirl my spoon around in the excess cinnamon and sugar that fell off into its bath making little tan designs.

"Anything special going on today?" he asks as I get up and pour the leftover milk down the drain.

To try and hide the fact I look like death I plaster on a fake smile and respond, "Nope, I don't think so." I retreat back upstairs not giving him a chance to create more conversation.

I walk into the bathroom and actually comb my hair with an actual comb. It looks a lot better than when I use my fingers. After brushing my teeth I stare at myself in the mirror. Okay, Eren you can do this. You...can...do..this... After the self-motivation, I head back to my room. I end up staring at my closet. I finally put on some light grey skinny jeans and a fuchsia v-neck 3/4 sleeve shirt. I slip on my Sperry's before looking in the mirror. I walk downstairs grab my bag and leave making no contact with my father.

On my way to school, I start getting anxious and start overthinking like I always do. I didn't know how they would react. Would all of them even accept me? I honestly wanted to just go back home but I kept moving my shaking legs.

I get to the school much earlier than I usually do and I see Armin and Sasha standing at our spot. "Hey, Eren this is the earliest I've ever seen you show up to school!" Sasha says.

"Woah, Eren you look like you didn't get an ounce of sleep!" Armin exclaims.

"Heh yeah I didn't" I admit.

The two stare at me mouth dropped "WAIT WHAT?" they say in synch.

"Yeah, I don't really know why but I'm here hehe" I nervously laugh as the rest of the group approaches. When I see everyone together my anxiety spikes and I zone out.

I can't tell them. Not right now. Not yet. I'm not...I'm not ready..........no! No, I already decided to do it today. Maybe at lunch, yeah. I need to talk to Armin. I need advice.

- - - - 20 minutes later - - - - 

The first bell rings and once again Armin and I make our way to class. I closely follow as he rambles about something related to school though I wasn't really listening, my mind was on something else. "Hey, are you even listening?"

I suddenly come out of my bubble,
"Huh? Uh yeah.....um....no" I admit.

Armin notices my mood, "alright tell me what's up". He can see right through me. We walk into class and sit down. Luckily we still have a good 5 minutes before class begins so we won't get called out this time.

"Do you think all of them will accept me?" I whisper.

Armin's eyes widen "U-um, yeah. I mean yes they will! They're our best friends, your best friends. They don't care about that stuff. They'll love you no matter what, even Jean. Trust me." He says with a comforting smile. I feel a little better and thank him. The bell rings and class begins.

- - - - Lunch period - - - - 

I make my way to our usual spot in lunch and sit between Armin and Mikasa. Quickly the gossip and bickering begins. My heart begins to race, my hands start sweating and shaking, and my breathing becomes uneven. I make quick eye contact with Armin and stand up, "U-um hey guys......guys!" I interrupt their conversations and suddenly all eyes are on me. I gulp. "Um, I-uhh have s-something to tell all of you." They all look at each other confused.

Armin tugs on my arm "Now?!" He asks wide eyed.

"Now" I give him a determined look. I take a deep breath and clear my throat. "Okay so, I'm gonna tell you guys something and I hope that it doesn't change the way you see me. I hope that you all will come to accept it...." I pause working up more courage, "I've uhhh been hiding something from you guys. I'm uh..." I take one final calming breath, "I-I'm......I'm gay."

I look around at their faces. Some had a surprised look, others looked like they were thinking, and one just had a straight face.

"How long have you known?" Mikasa broke the silence.

"I've started to accept it about 6 months ago, I probably would still be trying to suppress it now if it wasn't for Armin. He was the one who helped me through it and admit I was. Also sorry about that too, I made him keep it a secret from you........so, what does everyone think?" I ask nervously.

The five of them look at each other until Sasha, with a huge smile, finally speaks up, "Aww yayyy our little Eren came out!! I'm so proud! I'll love you no matter what dude!"

My eyebrows raise.

"I don't care about that kind of stuff you know that" Mikasa adds.

Marco is the next to speak, "I don't see the big deal! It's who you are!" By now I have a huge smile on my face.

Connie says, "Agreed, I still like ya!" The smile on my face could not get bigger.

Armin then speaks up for the first time ".... Jean?" I become nervous when I notice that his face hasn't changed in the last 5 minutes. He hasn't said a word. Oh no.

I open my mouth, "I know it's a shock but it's ok if you don't want to be friends anymo-" Jean raises his hand cutting me off.

Suddenly he smirks, "You think I'm some homophobe? I'm not that bad heh, but you think just because you're gay I don't like you? Hate to break it to ya but I've never liked you that much to begin with haha..." He laughs and starts again, "You're still the same annoying asshole, so as long as you don't start hitting on me, I'm cool with it." I'm shocked.

I chuckle, "Sorry horse face but you're not my type." The whole group laughs. I take my seat again feeling a weight lifted off of my entire body.

Armin pats my shoulder and grins at me, "see? I told you."

"Oh my God! Eren! Have, have you told your father?" Marco asked worriedly. He comes to church once in a while with his parents. His parents are just like my dad.

"No not yet. I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm scared of how he'll react." The group looks at me worried when I look down. A sort of pain fills my chest.

"Have you decided to do it this weekend?" Armin asks, and I think for a moment.

I cross my arms, "Ya know what? I was terrified for today, but I feel so much better now that I've told you. I need to get this burden off my back and come out to him, no matter what he thinks."

The bell rings ending our social time. Everyone hugs me and goes their own way. The rest of the day goes by smoothly, the following day as well. Before I realize it, it's Saturday.