Conquer the Wasteland

Snowmageddon

Liam plowed his way through the snow, gathering momentum with his broad shoulders. Sam leaped along beside him, sometimes following closely and sometimes rabbit-trailing through the snow, piling it on her nose. Unfortunately, I have the graceful height of a mushroom and had to hop from footprint to footprint, trying to keep up. Fat, white snowflakes drifted to the ground and filled the sky with an empty shade of gray. My nose, bright red and cold, burned like the campfire Liam refused to make.

"Slow down you flipping titan!"

Liam either couldn't hear me because of the muffling effect of the snow or ignored me because he's a colossal buttwipe. Angry, I jumped into the next footprint. The world flew away from my face, my feet slipped above my head, and my thick skull cut right through the snow like butter. I hit the ground with a sick thwack. Liam's swishing footsteps stopped.

"What'd you do now."

"A simple, 'Are you okay,' would suffice, THANK YOU," I wheezed. Silent tears streamed down my face and I gasped, trying to get back my stolen wind. A cold,dry tongue wiped my eye. Sam thought she was pretty helpful. Liam's face, unconcerned, blocked out the blinding gray of the sky.

"What happened?"

"The flying purple people eater got me, Floptard. I fear the end is near."

Liam rolled his gorgeous eyes. "You're an idiot. How'd you even fall?"

"Because! While you're stomping firmly into the snow with those canoes you call feet, I have to hop from hole to hole. I lost my balance. I fell. Sue me."

Liam picked me up and set me on my feet, something that's impressive and difficult enough without ice and snow making you weak.

"There's your problem." Liam gestured to where I'd jumped. Instead of ground, the snow covered white ice. Glancing at my eager face, Liam scowled. "No."

"Why not?"

"The zombie apocalypse in the dead of winter is not the time to go ice-skating!"

I frowned and turned away. My eyes caught on a shadow less than a football field away that had been obscured by snow until now.

"Liam," I squealed. He looked and immediately shook his head.

"Awww, why not!"

"There could be zombies in there."

"You can't say no twice in a row. It's, like, against the law, or something!"

"Mateo, we're in a frozen apocalyptic wasteland where you ARE the law, and I say no."

"That's three times now!"

Liam turned away, shoulders hunched. I changed my tactic. "Please. It's Christmas Eve."

His shoulders slumped.

"C'mon. We can take anything hiding in there if we're ready for it."

Liam hesitated, his eyes darting between me and the house shadow. "If we stay out here any longer we'll catch hypothermia."

I recognized that tone. It meant he agreed. I slugged Liam in the arm to show my gratitude and waddled through the snow toward the house as fast as I could. Sam bounded after me, barking excitedly. Apparently deciding that if we were going to go, we better go quickly, Liam hefted me up by my backpack straps and carried me like a wet cat to the front door of the house. He dropped me in a squishy heap and drew his gun with one hand. The other held Sam's collar to make sure she didn't bite a zombie and infect herself.