Bad Taste (book 1)

10

MONDAY NIGHT
[ ETHAN'S POV ]

I laid on my back with one leg straight while the other was bent. My hands were behind my head while my eyes darted onto the ceiling.

My chill playlist was playing music trough my speaker. My window was open letting my curtain sway with a cool breeze coming through.

All of my past experiences of hitting, shoving, pushing and bruising Allison were overwhelming my brain making me have a migraine.

That bottle must have hit a certain part of my head because I never thought I'd actually feel sympathy or sorrow towards her and it's flooding my body like water.

I can't believe I tortured this girl for a majority of her life just because I was jealous of her coming into our house and taking my spot.

I put my hands onto my face in regret. It wasn't her fault that her dad didn't want her to be home alone as an eight year old.

There's no way for me to make it up to her either. She's deathly scared of me.

I see the way her face drops every time she see's me. I see how she looks away from me when I look at her because she doesn't want me to approach her; scared I'll hurt her. I see the cuts on her wrist because of me.

I used to take these things for granted because I knew I had control of her, but now i wish that I never did scare her.

I made her life a living hell for eight years. A random innocent girl.

"Fuck." I groaned to myself getting frustrated. I just feel so damn bad.

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TUESDAY
[ ALLISON'S POV ]

"He was holding a conversation with you?" Taylor whispered while leaning over the table; eyes directed onto mine.

I nodded hesitantly, "he even gave me a strawberry. I know it's nothing big but like, it's Ethan." I rubbed the back of my neck.

She bit her lip and tapped her finger anxiously. Peytan stayed quiet thinking to herself.

"I have to see it to believe it." Taylor finally spoke.

I looked behind me to Ethans table and could see him not being interested in the humorous conversation that the rest of the guys were having.

His eyes traveled up to me but apart of me couldn't look away no matter how hard I wanted to.

His eyebrows lifted as the tiniest smile appears on his face. Not being used to this, I turned away and looked back to Taylor and Peytan.

"I'm gonna go to the vending machine and get some chips." I told them while grabbing a couple of coins out of my backpack.

They nodded while the kept talking about going shopping at some point this weekend.

As I got up I looked to Ethan and he was watching me as I stood up. As I walked away from the cafeteria I whispered to myself, "please don't follow me. please don't follow me."

Once I got to the hallway, I scanned all of the snacks that were inside the machine. I felt someone very gently grab my wrist causing me to pull away from them.

I turned around and was faced with Ethan. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." He apologized leaving me confused.

He looked genuinely sorry for scaring me but I couldn't help but feel fear soaking up through my body.

"Can we talk?" He clinched his jaw then biting the inside of his cheek after.
I looked around the halls being hesitant.

He let out a sigh as he looked down, "Look Ally," he gave me a nickname. No one has ever given me that nickname, or any nickname for that matter.

"I don't know what happened at that party, or if I'm actually hurt or not, but all I do know is that I'm drowning in guilt. Guilt from torturing you all theses years." His hazel eyes looked up to me.

I looked into his eyes, yet I still felt like I was looking into nothing.

I felt my body swarm with nervousness. did he just say he feels guilty?

"I just wanna make it up to you." He let out a giant breath.
"I don't know if that's a good idea." My shaky voice stuttered.

"We don't have to be friends of any sort, I just want to show you that I'm not the asshole you think I am." He defended himself.

I stood there absolutely speechless. This can't be real. This is the kid that has caused me to hurt myself. This is the kid that physically would push my down the stairs or grab my wrist so tight that it bruises.

Suddenly an uneasy feeling came over me. He's the definition of the devil, how could he be telling the truth?

He noticed my long pause, "I don't open up to basically anyone, but after realizing how wrong it's been of me to be treating you like this for your whole life, I want to show you that side of me. I owe it to you. Then after, we don't ever have to speak again." His hands gripped the straps of his backpack.

"I'm sorry, Ethan. This is too much." I walked past him and back into the cafeteria. I sat back down at my table and felt like I couldn't talk.

"You didn't even get chips?" Taylor laughed.
They noticed me being mute, "Whats wrong?"

"I don't wanna talk about it." I breathed in and out slowly to calm myself from being overwhelmed.

They looked over at the door and saw Ethan walk back in. He ran his fingers through his hair and sat back down with his friends.

"Did he hurt you again?" Taylor's face grew to be red in anger.
I shook my head.

"What happened?" Peytans full attention was on me.

I looked back up to him and his eyes glanced to me then back down to his hands. If it were anyone else I would feel bad, but it's him.

"He said something clicked in him and he now feels all the guilt inside of him for what he's done to me." I gave them a nervous look.

Both of their jaws dropped as they looked at each other. They looked back to me seeming to be speechless.

"It has to be a joke. There's no way that, that human feels guilt for someone. It has to be some sort of bet or game." Taylor looked over to Ethans table with a deadly look in her eyes.

"When I look into his eyes, I've always been able to see just how dead he is inside. I've never seen anything but darkness. When I looked in them, it was the exact same." I kept glancing between Taylor and Ethan.

"You need to stay away from him. It's going to turn out bad, Allison." Peytan gave me a very stern look of protection.

I nodded slowly then looking down to my lunch.
Even though he is most likely lying, apart of me was hoping that he wasn't.

No, I don't want any interactions with Ethan. I'd rather him just be out of my life, but since that can't happen, I can't help but just wish he actually felt the guilt he is saying that he feels.

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