MiNd Of MiNdd (intro)

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"Now that I'm on the edge I can't find my way, it's inside of my mind on mine."

All I felt was immense heat. Nothing satisfactory, but painful. Sweat. Burning. Bits of my hair clung to my forehead, my clothes stuck to my skin uncomfortably, my legs tangled abstractly in blankets. Heavy breaths, in and out. Pained whimpers, low and quiet. Grunting. Not me. Him

I couldn't breathe. Was his hand wrapped around my throat? No, a blade was against it. I didn't feel it. I felt no pain but knew I was hurting. I was blinded by his horrible face, this time with his eyepatch. His teeth were bared, making him look like a wild animal. He sounded like one. I was terrified.

Hot. Heat. Sweat. Shaking. Covers. Whimpers. Gasps. Groans. Scream. Scream, Belle, scream.

I shot up, gasping for air. I was sweating horribly. I kicked the blankets of my bed off me hurriedly. I frantically felt about my neck. No marks, no cuts, nothing. Good, I thought. I remembered it all. He was real, this was real, what happened was real.

I pulled my knees to my chest, shoving my head into them. I held the sides of my head, my fingers carding through my short hair. The tears ran down my face the same way the sweat ran down my back. It was hot sweat that now turned cold. I wanted to shiver but only felt heat. Heat. Heat. Heat.

"Hey, hey," Daryl said beside me. I couldn't pull myself away. I was too scared to open my eyes. "Belle, look at me," he pleaded. I gripped my head tighter, my shoulders tensing, sweat increasing. "Baby, please." 

I slowly brought my head up from my knees. Daryl stared at me with concern swimming in his eyes, but there was something else. I think it was fear. He was kneeling at my bedside. "That's it," he said as I showed more of my face. I brought my hands to his cheeks slowly. They were shaking. 

My fingertips lightly grazed his skin, slowly sliding to allow my palms to rest on his cheeks. They still shook slightly. Daryl closed his eyes with a sigh, sinking into one of my palms. I watched my shaking hands, becoming entranced by their minuscule movements.

"Belle," Daryl said. My eyes snapped over to his. They held the same concern and fear, adoration now mixing itself in. 

"It was him," I whispered, my voice wavering. 

Daryl sighed again, although this one sounded angry. I didn't think he was angry at me, I knew he wanted to end the Governor for what he did to me. What makes it harder, I think, is that this isn't the first time something like this has happened and Daryl just wants it to end. He grabbed my hands, his large ones encompassing my small ones. He slowly slid them down his cheeks, still lightly shaking in their wake. He pressed soft kisses to the heels of my hands, keeping his eyes locked on mine. 

Daryl lifted himself onto my bed, sitting with his back against the wall. I sat in between his legs, my right side leaning against his chest, head against his shoulder, my back to the entrance of my cell. Daryl wrapped his arm around me, the other holding onto my bent legs. He drew small lines and patterns on my skin as we sat in silence. I fumbled with the neckline of his shirt, enjoying the comfort he provided.

Daryl grabbed my hand, slowly entangling our fingers together. I watched as he did so. He took his time, savoring every moment of contact, wanting to prolong his actions. My heart fluttered as he held onto me with such devotion, almost desperation. I looked up at him, watching the way he looked at our entangled hands. I closed my eyes, leaning up to kiss his jaw softly. When I pulled away, he gave my hand a gentle squeeze.

"You've really loved me since you were sixteen?" Daryl asked, breaking our silence. I nodded, curling into his chest more. 

"You remember our first time hunting?" I asked. He hummed in response. "Since then, you've made me feel things I didn't know existed outside of movies. I got so nervous around you but you were still my best friend and I knew I couldn't change that. I didn't want to. I wanted to spend every waking second with you. And as I got older I just wanted more. I dug myself a deep hole with you that I never wanted to come out of." I chuckled to myself, thinking back to these bittersweet memories. I hid my face in Daryl's chest. "God, what did I do to deserve you?" I mumbled.

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