Not Like Your Demons

Chapter 4

The next time Lauren wakes up, the room around her is blurry and she's alone and feverish - lost and confused - and she's reeling from yet another terrible nightmare. She can't register where she is, no matter how hard she tries. All she knows is that he - with his cruel face and cruel, cruel hands - was there.

He could be here.

She whimpers in absolute fear, curling on her side and clutching Allen tighter to her bosom because her heart is pounding so fast and her chest is tightening so much it hurts. She's shaking and she can't stop it. There are tears in her eyes that she couldn't prevent from coming, falling in fat drops on her pillow.

You made me really angry again, Lauren, he said.

I'll punish you so bad, he said.

She clutches at the covers of the unfamiliar bed until her fingernails hurt and she starts to shake even worse. He's going to hurt her. Again. She doesn't want to hurt more but she doesn't know what to do to stop herself from hurting either.

She really doesn't. She wishes she does.

"A-Ally," she just whispers shakily, desperately, like a little kid, because she doesn't know who else to call, tears falling freely from her tightly-closed eyes. It's wrong to want things but she wants to be six again. She wants Ally by her side. She wants Ally to hug her even if it's impossible. She needs Ally because her head is hurting so bad and she's so, so cold. "Can you h-hear me? Please, Ally. Please come back? I-I need y-you...I need you so much," she sobs.

Ally doesn't though, because she can't. But Lauren really wants her to.

She really, really wants her to.

"A-Ally? T-take me p-please? H-he's g-going to h-hurt me again. P-please? Don't you w-want me, too?"

Her tears are now soaking up the stuffed lamb, but she couldn't stop them. She sobs quietly again, praying desperately that he wouldn't keep his promise.

But, like a punch hitting her in the stomach (because she knows exactly how that feels), she hears them.

Footsteps.

Her eyes fly open in terror, her chin trembles, and she shakes some more, curling over Allen tighter.

Help me.

"Lauren?"

She whimpers, closing her eyes tight. Please don't hurt me, she pleads in her mind, even if she knows it wouldn't stop him.

Please. I promise I'm sorry.

"Lauren? Are y-you awake?" the voice asks again. It's small, nervous, and doesn't sound like him, but it does nothing to stop Lauren from shuddering; it does nothing to calm her pounding heart.

Everyone's going to punish you, he said.

No one's going to love you, he said.

You deserve every little hurt and everyone knows that, he said.

"Oh, Lauren," the voice is saying. It's getting closer. Lauren's head is pounding in fear now, and she tries sinking into the bed more, trying to hide behind the pillow. Her bruised stomach and shoulder hurt with how tight she's hugging Allen, but she ignores it.

I won't be bad...Please.

There's a clank of glass from somewhere in her side, and she knows she's really going to get it. Father is always worse after he's had his glass. She wonders how he would punish her this time. Would he lock her in the closet again? Punish her with the buckle of his belt until she bleeds? Slam her head on the wall? Punch and kick her again and again, until it hurt for her to stand? Make her kneel on frozen peas for six hours?