Memories of Summer

[A Memory of Summer: Samantha]

The smoke that comes from a lonely cigarette slowly glides through the air as its owner has just passed out on a worn out brown couch. The woman in the couch still lies in her working clothes as it is in the middle of the afternoon and she just got off from her first job, but in a few hours, she has another one waiting.

A small figure walks through the apartment, afraid of making a single sound that could wake up, in her eyes, the most precious person in her life.

In the kitchen, she lifts up a chair and puts it down in front of a cabinet. The sun that shines through the thin white curtains creates a shadow against the pale yellow wall color.

"Samantha?"

Even though the womanly figure on the couch only mumbles in her sleep, the figure standing on the chair with her black her put in an uneven braid stops moving. She waits a few seconds before she can hear the soft sound of deep breaths being taken in and being realized. Samantha once again reaches for the package of cereals which her mother has placed in one of the higher cabinets.

Sammy climbs down from the chair before lifting the chair and placing it back next to the table. The entire sink is filled with old dishes and uncleaned glasses.

In the summer heat, it has attracted a lot of flies. The little girl tried her best to just wave the flies away but she is afraid that washing the dishes will make too much sound, so that her mother will wake up.

She deserves to sleep.

Samantha grabs the last clean bowl and finds a spoon she used this morning. In the fridge is a package of expired milk standing. Samantha pores the milk over her cereals just as a middle-aged woman strolls into the kitchen. Her muscles are aching but she just keeps walking. She is too used to the pain that she can't make out the difference between feeling good or not.

Sammy watches her every step as she can't help but feel ashamed of her mother catching her sitting and eating in the middle of the day. The woman takes a cup of cold coffee as she sits down in front of her daughter and takes out a cigarette from the front pocket of her blouse.

She takes the package of cereals in her hand and shakes them, but the package is empty and in frustration, the woman throws the package across the room until it lands in the far corner where the sun can't see it.

"Samantha, these were supposed to last for the entire week."

The bags under the eyes of the woman that sits before Samantha are health threatening deep. The before so beautiful deep rich black and long hair is now more grey than black. The wrinkles in the woman's forehead and around the eyes seemed to have gotten a deeper grip on her mother's face since the last time Sammy saw her. But she is not sure.

"I was hungry."

Sammy's voice is slightly shaking as the woman takes her hand and drags it over her face and let it rest in her hair before taking a deep drag from her cigarette. She turns against the window before she blows it out. She studies her daughter and reaches over the table to caress her hair and then hold her head up to look her in her dark eyes.

"Just eat it all up."

Sammy smiles at her mother as she tries to ignore the sour taste of the milk as she eats her last cereals. The woman takes deep sips of her coffee, thinking that it will bring her motivation back to life.

But without results.

"I will be working tonight."

What her mother said doesn't come as a surprise to Samantha. Her mother always works, mornings, afternoon, night, weekend... birthdays.

"If I give you five dollars, do you think you would be able to go and buy some bread?"

Samantha looks up into her mother's eyes and feels the proud feeling inside of her chest spread throughout her body, her mother is depending on her. She nods as her mother starts to dig through her pockets to search for any money. She finally finds some in her back pocket, but when she pulls it out it is only two dollars.

"Why don't you ask if they have any old bread they were going to throw out anyway. Can you do that for me?"

As Samantha takes the money she tries to act just as happy as she was before, but there is a small shame spreading inside of her body as she would just want to be like the other families that always stand in the check out with baskets full of fresh food.

But she will still do anything to please and make her mother happy.

Through the window, the sound of an ice cream truck is heard and you can see how all kinds of children are running after it to be first and get their favorite kind of ice cream. But neither Sammy or her mom makes a single motion to move.

A sudden knock echoes through the building. Samantha looks at her mother who still looks out of the window as she moves the cigarette closer to her mouth. She shrugs her shoulders as she still looks out into nowhere special.

Sammy quietly moves from the table where her still uneaten cereals stand. They usually never get anyone coming over this time of the day, so it's not with confidence as Sammy opens the door.

Outside is a woman and two men standing. The woman that stands in the front smiles at Sammy but the woman's smile doesn't meet her eyes and Samantha doesn't smile back.

The woman bends down a little to be at the same height as Sammy, but Samantha already regrets opening the door.

"Hello, we are from child protective services. Is your mother home?" 

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6th of April