Return Of The Devil (Kyman Fanfic) [[DISCONTINUED]]

state of clyde

~ Kyle's POV~

They thought I was asleep , that I'd burnt out from the fight , but nope. I'd just given up trying to get out of Cartman's iron grip.

Now I was lay on the sofa eyes closed , and listening to there convosation. Which in all honesty is something I'd always wanted to do , since both me and Stan were confused at how they'd become best friends when they always used to piss each other off. Not as much as Cartman and me but still.

"For fuck sake , I have a crush on Kyle!" Cartman said , with a distressed tone , followed by Kenny giggling like a school girl.  What. What. What. What. WHAT!? I felt my cheeks starting to heat up and I turned , still pretending to be asleep , away from them so they didn't see my face.

Eric Cartman has a crush on me....ERIC FUCKING CARTMAN HAS A CRUSH ON ME!!! I couldn't believe it, since he'd been such a jerk to me all his life. He thinks I'm asleep still , I need to calm the hell down. And 'wake up' soon , I know Kenny is most likely already suspicious..

"So , when you gonna tell him this fact?" Kenny giggled , I couldn't hear Cartmans answer as it was mumbled. Was he embarrassed...? Awh! That's so cute!

There was a knock on the door , which made me jump slightly , I think Kenny saw it as he got up and started poking me as Cartman went to answer the door.

"Get up Ginge. Cartman is gonna bellyflop you otherwise" he laughed , continuing to poke me. I groaned and sat up , glaring at him and rubbing my eyes. Trying to pretend I was alseep.
"Don't try to fool me , don't worry. I won't tell Cartman what you know" he grinned at me as I blushed.

Cartman came back in the front room with Stan , butters , Wendy and tweek.  They looked at me and laughed a little. Cartman looked at me and grunted , sitting back down on the floor , followed by the others.

They were sat in the floor in a circle , me still on the sofa. Cartman threw his folder down in front of everyone. "Now we're done with the commotion , can we deal with the task at hand?" Everyone nodded in agreement. Stan and Kenny glancing at each other with smirks on there faces.

"So what's the plan fatass" Wendy questioned , staring at the brunette. I glared at her , and she mouths "sorry" at me. I kept my glare momentarily then looked over Cartman's shoulder at his folder.

"Ok. We all know pc as a thing against people with disabilities. It's like a weakness , which he hates because he wants to love all people. Weirdo he is. Anyways. If we could get Jimmy to get all his disabled fwends , and team up on him , Pc would start to get stressed. Then the rest of us start messing with his SJW followers , saying facts and shit like that. Against fat acceptance. How feminism isn't really needed , ect. This will make him want to hide in his safe space. But we'll break the save space." He paused , taking a mental note on the others faces , that all seem to be in deep thought.

"This will eventually make him go insane and want to hurt someone. I'll be who he'll go against , since ...out of all of us I'm clearly the only one who could stand a chance against him. And the rest will be history" he said , closing his eyes and closing his folder , making everyone jump at the sudden slap.

"What do you guys think?"  He murmured looking around the circle.

"Do you think it'll work...and what if...what if you...O-or someone else gets hurt?" I questioned. If he's gonna go up against pc he's obviously gonna get hurt. It may end up like last time we made Cartman go against him , 3 weeks in the hospital. He looked at me and chuckled.

"Don't worry Jew. I'll be fine , any one else have any questions" Kenny put his hand up. "You didn't need to put your hand up moron."

"I know. I just wanted too haha" he laughed. "Anyways. What if people start to think we're sexist , racist or something? People like Kyle and Wendy can't have that on there references for good unis." His voice was a serious tone now , I tried to say something but Wendy cut me off.

"I'm..I'm sure we could deal with it... couldn't we Kyle" she stated , a faint smile on her face but sadness in her eyes.

"Y-yeh.. we'll be fine" I said reassuringly , though my face showed concern , mostly about how Cartman might end up hospitalised.

"Then it's settled. I'll send everyone the plan with parts they need to do a a later date." Cartman informed the group , nodding his head slightly.
After about two minutes of awkward silence I piped up.

"H-how...how is Clyde..?"

"He-he w-will b-be fine!" Tweek spoke quickly, his voice constantly changing pitches and him twitching throughout. "Cr-craig , j-jimmy and token took him to H-hospital" he tried to he reassuring, but his face just looked constipated. It's easy to Tell when he needs coffee.

Oh no...what did I do...all because I was annoyed at something he said to someone else. It wasn't even aimed at me!? Why did I hurt him like that? ... argh...dumbass crush... I must of looked mortified because Stan got up and came to sit next to me. "Kyle , it's ok. Clyde will be fine ,ok?"he smiled at me.
I just nodded and pushed my hat back onto my head , standing up.
"We had better get back o school. Or we'll loose our attendance."

"Argh.. NEEEERRRRDDDD" all but Wendy groaned at me. I just sniffed and walked out the house with Wendy.

"We may be nerds , but your all still  bigger geeks than us" she sang as we walked up the street , I laughed and shoved my hands in my pocket.

Non of the others followed. Typical.

"Hey , Kyle?" Wendy twittered next to me , moving a jet black lock of hair from by her nose and shoving it gently behind her ear.

"Yeah?"

"Stan told me by the way. About your crush? Well...I'm here if you ever need any advice with guys." She smiled at me , patting my shoulder gently. I looked back and smiled. "Thanks... But Cartman is like most guys.." I laughed and continued walking , her by my side.

We got back to school , pc principal was waiting for me. "Oh fuck..."