Change//H.S

t h i r t y f o u r

I woke up to what looked like the middle of the night, I turned over to see that in fact it was just past 7am. I rolled back into my back and stared up to the ceiling, I treasured this time because I didn't feel hungover.

I rethought my life in this time, I was 22 with loads of qualifications but did nothing with my life other than help out every so often with the businesses financial things- infact I think the only practical job I've had was in Topshop back when I was 18/19.

I was getting sick of relying on my father for money, I was a grown woman doing absolutely nothing with her life other than go to her father for money. I had the idea of getting a job but never actually knew what I wanted to do.

I sighed wrapping my dressing gown around me the second I got out of bed so I didn't freeze from the cold air I knew was going to be filling the downstairs. I got to the bottom of the stairs when the strong smell of kebab and pizza filled my nose, I ran to the sink letting the sick hit the base of it.

I moaned grabbing a bottle of water out the fridge before turning the see the mess that was all over my kitchen. I knew that non of us were going to be in the mood to tidy all this up today so I sent the cleaner a code red message and told her I would pay extra if she didn't tell my parents.

I shut the kitchen door after opening all he windows to try let the smell out, I made my way to the sitting room and put an episode of Criminal Minds on. I wasn't really paying attention to the episode I was using it more for a backing noise while I looked through Twitter and Snapchat.

I heard someone coming down the stairs "don't go in the kitchen" I shouted

"Trust me from what I can remember last night, I really don't want to" Lottie spoke holding her chest

I threw her over my bottle of water watching her as she basically drank all of it handing me the bottle with not even half a mouthful in it back. I slouched back in the chair holding my head in my hands "I really need a coffee"

"I don't think any of us are in the state to drive just yet and I don't think we want to step foot in that kitchen"

"Luna said she was coming once she dropped her son off at football to clean the hole thing up, she's honestly such a gem. I used to text her loads when I was a teenager to tidy up after the house parties I used to run" I laughed "my mum never found out about any, she was definitely more of a mum to me and Malia than my actually mum was at that time"

"I really miss my mum, I hate not having someone to go to if I need anything. She used to do everything for me even if I didn't ask i guess it's just weird not having her around" Lottie shrugged

"My mum used to be like that but she just changed I guess. Obviously it won't be the same and I understand that, but if you ever need anything you know you can just come to me and Malia or even lily and Esmae"

"I'm so glad I met yous, honestly my life before this was just 24/7 looking after Earnest and Dorris, and on the odd occasion Phoebe and Daisy. I do feel for them though they've had to grow up so quick"

"Me and Harry were talking about that after the night we looked after them, they are so amazing with the younger ones. Phoebe was showing me tips on how to do make up and letting me try all her shoes on" I laughed

"Yeah I get along better with Phoebe shes a lot more girly like me, she loves the shoes and the make up where as Daisy's a lot more like Felicity she doesn't really take much interest in it"

"I hated growing up it was like I constantly had to be perfect, all the way until I moved here I was dressed in preppy outfits going to private schools. Malia always loved it but it really wasn't for me" I shrugged

"What changed when you got here?" She asked

"Me" Lily laughed walking through the door slouching next to me "I was a bad influence, her mother never liked me. Don't think she does to this day"

We both laughed remembering the good times "that's why I loved my mum she didnt want me to be anything I didn't want to be, she called herself a cool mum" Lottie joined in laughing with us

"I can't wait to be a mum, I definitely would try to be the mum your mum was" I smiled at lily

"I'm scared to be one, I have the worst connection with kids ever. They all hate me" Lily laughed

"You should meet Doris and Earnest sometime, they love everyone" Lottie smiled

"We need to do something today, I can't physically just sit around when I'm hungover it makes me feel worse" Liam rubbed his head as he joined us "Malias in the bathroom she will be down soon"

"There's nothing to do, it's freezing outside" lily shrugged

"How about we go shopping for Christmas decorations. I doubt your parents are going to do this place" Lottie looked around the room

"We have all the stuff it's upstairs in the loft" Malia spoke

"Well then let's go get everyone up and decorate this place" I stood up cheering

It was about an hour passed our decision and we were currently standing in front of a Christmas tree that literally looked like shit "how the fuck do you put up this thing" Niall said faffing with the branches

"Lunaaaa" I shouted

"Yes my darling" she looked at all of us then looked at the tree "ohh, i help"

We exited the room and started on the hall way, we placed the garlands up the banisters and began placing ornaments and lights everywhere "the lights outside are already up but we just need to turn them on upstairs, it looks so pretty when outsides all lit up"  Malia spoke

"There's light up things that go outside on the lawn if people want to do that, I really don't want to go outside in that cold" I laughed

"Come on Tommie, let's do this"

I smiled at everyone around me, I smiled at the snow that began to fall from the half dark sky, I just wish harry was hear to experience it too.

It's Christmas fucking Eve!!!!!! And I have nothing better to do with my life than stare at the ceiling buzzing for Santa coming like I'm sorry right but I will be believing until I have kids because it just takes all the magic out of it.

I hope yous all have a lovely day, and enjoy the rest of the year ready to start brand new in 2018!!!!