Langst One-Shots

Blue Paladin, Blue Tears

Prompt: Just some insecure Lance

Another story written by another editor of mine! (shiro_milo )

xXx

It was a day like every other one. Hunk was cooking in the kitchen, Keith was training since the morning. Pidge was as always on her laptop searching for hints for Matt and her father. Shiro and Allura were in the control room making some new plans for the mission. Coran was cleaning the cryo pods after they needed to be used after the last mission.

But Lance, oh Lance, he didn't know what to do with his life. He sat in his room staring at the wall. The last mission went down hill. He fucked up everything. The others got out alive and almost uninjured, but Lance, he almost died. And it wasn't even a hard mission, just basic stuff. He fucked it up again.

The longer he stared at the wall the harder it got to hold back the tears. Slowly but sure his vision began to become blur. He wiped his eyes with his sleeve but then it didn't worked anymore, too many tears. They all run down his cheeks, wet his shirt. A sob escaped his throat but it wasn't that loud, so nobody heard him.

As fast as he could he put his hands over his mouth to silence the new one's coming up his throat. He sat there silent and sobbing, for him it felt like hours but it was just about ten minutes. Now all over his shirt were the wet points from his tears. He didn't noticed that he was shaking until he watched his hands.

But that wasn't everything. He could feel it coming. His lungs started to tighten. It was getting harder to breath. His breathing began to speed up. Now he slipped down to the ground leaning his back against his bed. With shaking hands he grabbed his shirt tight. The tears were still streaming down his face, his breathing was fluttering that were the symptoms of a panic attack.

No, not now. Not... now please that's everything he didn't need after what happened on the mission. Because of him Keith and Pidge almost died. At the last moment he had realized and jumped to take the bullets. With a groan he fell to the ground nearly unnoticed by the others. They only heard the dull impact and when he cried out in pain.

He took a look at the clock and saw it was close to dinnertime. Not good, when he wouldn't show up at diner someone will come to see if he's alright. He brought his knees to his chest to calm himself down and pretend someone was hugging him, but it didn't worked out the way he wanted it to do.

His heart was beating hard inside his chest.

Getting faster with every breath he took.

It was so painful to breath.

Just sitting here hurts.

"I can't breath. I can't move. Help me... It's so hard...." He was cut off by his sobs, but he put his pillow over his face to cover it up. Now it sounded dulled. But the pillow wasn't a good idea cause it just made worse. He couldn't breath regular anyways but now...

"Breath! Just fucking breath!" Lance cried out in pain. He rolled over the floor groaning in pain. He laid there for another few minutes trying to catch his breath again. When he realized it didn't helped Lance forced himself in a sitting position.

His breathing still irregular Lance moved in the direction of the bathroom. Every time he got a panic attack and nothing helped he went to shower and just waited till it got better. He crawled into the shower and turned the water on.

It felt down on his head making now all of his cloths wet but Lance didn't care anyways. Trying to calm himself down he sat there for over five minutes without any results. His heart still beaten painfully hard in his chest and his breathing didn't changed very much.