Sadly Mistaken

Friends Shmends

Chapter 15
[Friends Shmends]

"Kat! Are you even listening to me?" Bree asks me, and brings me back to reality.

"Of course I was!" I quickly respond.

"What did I just say then?" Bree asks.

"Um.." I start, not having a clue what to say.

"You were thinking about Dean weren't you?" 

"No I'm wasn't! Why would you think that?" I quickly defend myself.

Lie

"Because you just blushed when I said his name."

"I did not!"

Lie

"And you talk about him all the time! Sometimes I even think that he is here with us!" Bree says matter of factly.

"You've got this all wrong Bree. We're just friends!" I say, panicking. I feel my face heat up.

"Friends shmends. If that's what you really think."

I argue with Bree for a little longer, then decide to just give up fighting Bree. Bree puts 10 Things I Hate About You in her TV. I've watched that movie one hundred times at least before, but this time it seems different. When Kat hates Patrick at first, but slowly begins to feel different about him, it feels oddly familiar.

Familiar to Dean and I. He mistook me for a freshman. I despised him for that. He wormed his way into my life. I gave in. And here we are now. It's crazy how fast things can change.

"Are you still thinking about Dean?" Bree asks again, as the credits roll on the screen.

"No way!"

Yes way.

"You are totally into him Kat. You just won't admit it." She laughs.

I don't know how I feel about Dean. All I know is that there is a small part of me that wants to know how Dean feels about me.

~~~~~

I pull into my driveway, and take a deep breath. I decided to finally sit down with my mom and talk to her civilly about my father. I can't ignore her forever. I need to take steps to move on. I walk into the house and see my mother at the kitchen table, looking what I assume are medical bills.

"Mom, can we talk?" I ask her.

"Not right now sweetie. I'm kind of busy," she says. Of course she's too busy for the daughter that she's lied to for months.

"Please Mom. I really need to talk to you about Dad. I need to clarify some things, but I mostly just want us to be okay again," I beg her.

"Alright," She says, and sits down on the couch and motions for me to join her.

"I don't want you to keep anything important from me ever again. I don't know if you truly understand how much this hurt me Mom."

"I know, and I'm sorry. I hope you know what your father and I did was what we thought would be best for you. We didn't mean to hurt you." My Mom says, her eyes watering. I'm still frustrated with her and my dad, but what's in the past is in the past. Nothing can be changed. It's time for me to move on. I embrace my mom in a long hug, and we stay that way for what seems like a year.

"There's probably something else you should know," my mom says, looking at me worriedly.

"The fundraiser you've been participating in, I didn't make you participate in it because you were in trouble." She begins, "I made you participate because the fundraiser is for our family."

I let it sink in before I blurt out anything I could regret saying.

"I thought Dad's cancer is inoperable? What is the money going for if the money can't be used to surgery?" I ask, trying anything to see if this isn't true.

"The money is making life more comfortable for your father in his last six months." My mom sobs. I hold her in my arms, slow tears dripping down my face.

"Don't tell anyone Kat," she whispers.

"I won't," I whisper.

~~~~

"Your dad is who we're fundraising for?" Dean exclaims. I quickly put my fingers over his mouth to silence him.

"Be quiet! I'm not supposed to tell anyone! You're the only person who knows about my dad."

I'm sitting with Dean at a booth in the Riverton Diner. I called him the day my mom told me about the fundraiser. I needed someone to talk to or I would have exploded. Literally.

"So what are you going to do?" He asks somewhat quieter.

"Nothing. This is between you and me. And Bree too."

"Have you even talked to your dad since the winter dance?"

"No, I haven't had enough courage to visit him again." I've almost driven to the care facility on multiple occasions, but ended up driving back home. I just want to deny the fact that my dad has an expiration date, but I know that this is very real and can't be avoided.

"You really should visit him. You don't know how much time you have left together." The fact that Dean is right makes me want to cry. But the fact that he is comforting me is also reassuring.

"I know, I just don't know what to say to him."

"Just start with hello, and just let the conversation take its course. It will be easier then you think."

I look at him comforting me. He is so sweet. So caring.

I want to kiss him.

I quickly brush the thought out of my head. He thinks we are just friends. I only just recently have started to feel differently about him. I just need some air.

"I uhh have to go. Bye Dean." I manage to stutter and quickly leave some money on the table. I get in my car and make my way to my dads care facility. I'm shaking as I approach my dad's room. I knock three times.

"Come in," I hear his deep voice say. His face is shocked when he recognizes me in the door.

"Kat, I didn't know you were coming."

"It was kind of a spur of the moment thing."

"Well I'm happy to see you."

We stare at each other in silence, not knowing what to say.

"I'm really sorry dad. I should have just ignored my anger and visited you more often," I finally choke out, on the edge of tears. "I'm scared I wasted  time we could have had together." Wow Kat, way to ease into the conversation.

I run to my dads bed, and embrace him. I missed him. I begin to sob.

"It's okay Kat. I know how hard this must be for you."

I don't know how long we stayed embraced. All I know is that I felt more comforted that I had in months.