Beanie Girl

Chapter 24

Chapter 24: A Hidden Light In Her Eyes

Ramdam ko ang tagatak na pawis sa aking noo. Ang lamig lamig ng hangin ngunit iba ang epeko ng mga mata niya ngayong ang ginawa lamang niya ay titigan ako at isayaw sa damuhan.

Damn it!

Gulat ako ng bigla siyang kumalas sa pagkakahawak sa akin ng matapos ang kanta. Hindi pa rin maalis ang titig ng mga mata niya sa akin. Parang lumiliwanag iyon ngayong gabing ito.

“You should go home. It's night.” sambit niya.

“I-I c-can stay longer, a-and we've just practiced a single song!” protesta ko, pero umiling siya.

“It's dark, it's dangrous on the streets if you go home too late. That's enough dancing already.”

“We've danced for 3 minutes then it's enough? Why is that?!”

“'Cause something's are better remembered when done at the right time.”

What the hunch does she mean?!

“I don't get it. Ano iyon? Parang magpapractice ka lang mag-gitara pag trip mo? Eh diba practice makes perfect? So dapat araw-araw yun!”

“It's not that. For instance, when trying to play a guitar, and you want to play your favorite song on your own, every second spent on practing the chords and being able to get the tone of it is a memory on a right time. Because it's something that you want to achieve. It's not on the everyday hour that you practice playing it, it's on every second that you wanted to learn so badly.”

“So... what's the difference of that to our dance?”

“... the feeling conveyed from the song to us was memorable. The right time to be remembered. Isn't it your eyes we're clearly saying it too?”

In an instant, my heart stopped beating, or I'm just really...

What in the world this girl has to make me feel this way? I mean... it's just... her words are different on her actions... they're like, mixed signals.

Mixed Signals.

“Mixed signals. Metaphorically speaking, you're showing her something that she thought was true, but it isn't. She thought you had a crush on her by your actions. Caring for a girl gives that signal.”

Is she confused? Is she hiding feelings from me? Does she have a crush on me?

I'm hoping she does. Abot tenga ang aking mga ngiti habang sinusundan siya.

GOD, HOW I WISH SHE HAS A CRUSH ON ME! Ramdam ko rin naman... Pero ayoko na rin nama mag-assume. Nakakatakot na mag-akala sa mga bagay na walang kasiguraduhan.

I already lost my bestfriend, and I, I shouldn't lose her too. If it pains me to hide this, then I'll just endure it.

Nang makarating na kami sa labas ng fields (outside the fences), ay dire-diretso na akong sumakay ng motor, since pinark ko na lang iyon malapit sa fields. I figured na wala naman doon magnanakaw at may makakakita naman roon dahil sa may malapit na tindahan.