silence. +martinus gunnarsen+

guilt

i felt my heart drop into my stomach. i cant believe they were reading that.

i could feel the tears starting to rush down my face. hearing it out loud made it so much worse. i cant believe they were reading it.

cant they just respect my privacy and not have to go looking for an answer?

emma-"alex what's wrong."

aw crap. i turned and so emma. i went past her and went into my room.

i went into the corner of my room and just sat down. i had my hands in my face i couldnt even speak.

all i did was breath out sobs and have tears pour down my face.

i heard someone knocking on my door. i didn't say anything. i had no idea who it was and i didnt want to know who was on the other side of the door.

emma-"alex? whats wrong."

i didn't say anything. i put my hood over my head and covered my eyes with my hands.

emma-"alex please!"

she was knocking harder and faster.

marcus-"emma whats wrong?"

oh great. now marcus is outside and this is all getting so much worse.

emma-"alex won't come out."

martinus-"well why not?"

no. i dont want martinus coming in. he can't see me cry. this is already the worst day ever and it hasn't even begun yet.

martinus-"alex? what's wrong. seriously?"

marcus-"please what happened?"

i couldnt even form the words to say anything to the two of them. great just great. why is this happening to me.

i want to go home. i want to go home and be with my brother and my mom. i dont want to be here.

i took my phone from my hand and dialed jack. maybe he could come me down.

jack-"hey."

alex-"j-jack."

jack-"alex whats wrong."

alex-"t-they were talking about me. they know everything."

jack-"shh alex please don't cry."

i needed him to give me a hug but he couldnt do that.

jack-"alex?"

i hung up the call. he wasn't going to do anything for me. hes so far away.

gerd anne-"alex its me."

i didn't even want to see her. i always want to see gerd anne. she was the first one here i felt comfortable with.

gerd anne-"alex please."

i didn't say anything. the door opened. it was gerd anne.

i could see the blonde strands of hair, the boys were still out there.

she came and kneeled in front of me.

gerd anne-"what is it?"

alex-"marcus, m-martinus."

gerd anne-"what did they do?"

alex-"i can't."

gerd anne-"fine. i will find out from them."

she looked at her watch.

gerd anne-"oh boy they are going to be late. we will continue this when we get home. you are staying here."