Living with the Baker boys

Chapter 19 - Decision

Chapter 19 - Decision

Natasha's POV

I haven't eaten, slept or spoken in three days. I have been in my room as much as I can, rarely leaving. I haven't been to school, I wouldn't be able to focus. I don't go down to eat meals with the Baker's, but they always come to my room and try and get me to leave. I just sit there, saying nothing and doing nothing. Eventually they leave, but they are reluctant. Mason never comes up to get me though. I don't think he can bear to see my face.

The pain I feel is too strong for me to do anything. I can't even cry anymore because I have run out of tears. Mason hasn't spoken to me, every time he sees me he looks away. I can't bear to have him hate me like this, it hurts so much.

People have tried to talk to me but I don't answer. I've seen myself in the mirror, my eyes look completely vacant.

I just want all the pain to end, the one thing that I need in my life is gone, so there is no point in continuing. I'm not needed by anybody, no one will miss me. I will end it all, I've made my decision.

I get off my bed, feeling a new found sense of determination. I'm going to finally do what I have been so scared tot do before. I walk into the bathroom and towards the sink. I pick up the razor, looking at myself one more time in the mirror before I bring the razor down to my wrist. I push it deeply into my skin as I bring it across my wrist, donning this over and over again, then moving onto the other one.

There is blood everywhere and I start to feel light headed. Black spots start to appear in my vision and I feel myself falling. I hit the floor with a thud and everything around me starts fading. I know I don't have much time left. I welcome death with open arms, finally getting what I have been waiting for. Just before I leave this world completely I say.

"I love you Mason."