Not So Innocent | Jai Brooks. AU

-Eleven-

-Jai-

So, Carol is meeting up with Louise again on Saturday. I could spy on them maybe? No that's too weird.

Oh, but you're a psycho Jai. Of course you're weird.

"Fuck off" I mumbled to the voices In my head. Why was I chosen to have voices in my head? Why did he pick me?

You're the chosen one Jai.

Oh fuck off. Me? The chosen one? Obviously.

Anyway, back to the plan.

Louise is meeting her at the mall at 10:30am. So if I leave after them around 11am I can spy on them and get close enough to hear what they're saying.

No I can't, they're are bound to see me! Oh fuck this is harder than I thought.

I'll just have to try and get it out of Louise one way or another

-Louise-

Jai's acting so suspicious, he's up to something and I want to know what it is. Maybe I should just ask him? No, he definitely won't tell me. Eugh, this sucks.

"Louise, can I talk to you?" Jai asked, walking through the lounge door.

"Erm, sure" I smiled, hoping it would be something about why he's acting up.

"You know Carol... What did she exactly say?" He tilted his head. "I told you" I tried to avoid this conversation because it will end up in an argument and tears.

"You shouted it to me, I couldn't exactly understand you" He replied whilst scratching the back of his neck.

"If you must know, she was saying that you used to flirt with her, like you were dating. She mentioned the notes you used to put in her office before your meeting. And the fact when you escaped you went straight to her house and kicked Luke out and you practically beat her up" I sighed.

"Oh" Was the only thing that came out of his agape mouth.

"Sooo" He dragged out the letters out.

"Sooo" I copied him. "So, that's it?" He asked. "Yes, why? Is there something else I should know about?" I raised my eyebrows. Of course there is something they've both kept quite about, it will just take time to get it out of one of them.

"E-erm. N-no. There's ah, nothing" Jai smiled and ran upstairs. Yes he is definitely hiding something.

-Jai-

'Hallelujah' I thought as I reached my room, she hadn't told her! If she knew she would like kill me. Literally. So would Carol.

Carol probably want to kill me anyway, from what I did to her. She deserved it the bitch.

There's bitches and then there's Carol.
Carol is a NO.1 bitch.

Anyway enough about that hoe, I need to stop her before she blabs. I do not like it when people blab about me, especially girls like her.

But how? Shes going to talk as soon as I see her. She'll call the cops or some shit.

Maybe I should just stalk her and stab her at the right moment? Yeah! Good plan!

"So, it's Saturday in two days. Two days to plan my revenge on little miss bitch. She won't see what's coming, bless.

I'll follow her home and creep up behind her and end her miserable life right on her door step, then discard the knife and run back here. I'm a good one for coming up with plans!

Fuck off, I'm the one who gives you all these ideas.
You psycho.

God these voices are doing my head in!

I put the plan to the back of my mind and focused on Louise.

"So, fancy doing anything today?"
I asked her. "No" She simply stated and turned to look at the TV again. Rude.

"Louise, what's wrong?" I asked, squishing next to her on the sofa. Her legs brushing against mine as she moved over. What's her problem? "Nothing is wrong" She didn't break contact from the television.

"Louise, I've known you long enough to know when you're lying" I chuckled. "Okay then Jai. What are you hiding from me?" She turned around and faced me, crossing her legs as she did so.

"What? I'm not hiding anything?" Fuck, she must either know or she's figured out that I'm on to Carol.

"Don't lie to me Jai! You're acting suspicious when I mention Carol, you're suspicious about what she's said, was there something she was meant to tell me? I'll find out either way Jai so you're better off telling me now" She sighed, running her hand through her hair.

"If you don't tell me I could just easily ask Carol on Saturday, face to face. Or you could just tell me now and stop all the lies?" She huffed and uncrossed her legs to stand up. "Wait" I grabbed her hand which made her turn around almost immediately, worry taken over her perfect face.

"I'll tell you" I smiled, as I watched her face go back to normal. "Talk" She said as she sat back down.

"Me and erm, Carol. Well, I kind of, well we kind of...erm" "Just spit it out Jai for god sake! I haven't got all day!" She snapped. Fuck give me time!

"Well, Carol was dating Luke at the time. I was out of the mental asylum and me and Carol were like you and I. She let me stay at hers, kept me away from people so I couldn't cause any trouble. She hid me from my own brother and we got close, a little too close. We were talking and things led to another and got out of hand and about a week later she told me she was pregnant. I couldn't help but take my anger out on her so I started to get abusive towards her. I put her in hospital, she lost the baby.

I handed myself back to the asylum because I couldn't deal with the guilt, she told Luke that it was his, but I killed the baby. So Luke has always hated me since that day. And I haven't spoken to him for three years.

Yes it was all my fault. Yes I killed the baby. I didn't mean to, I killed my own baby. I couldn't been a dad. None of this would've happened if these voices weren't in my fucking head.

I know you're going to think I'm some fucked up lad who kills unborn babies and families. But that's what I am. I just want to put things right with Luke. My family are the only things I have left. I miss them so much. But you're helping me get better. So I can see them soon. Even though none of them are going to talk to me and we won't be 'happy families' But at least they'll know that I still think of them and that I love them.

I can't lose them, they're the only people who understood me. My mum, she was the first woman I ever loved. Of course not it that way but she was there for me. She put a roof over my head. She fed, bathed, clothed, loved, cared for me. She was my role model. My dad, fucked off with another woman and left my mother to bring up three boys on her own. Which she did very well. My brothers, Beau and Luke were my best friends. I couldn't live without them! Luke and I were so close.

We told each other everything.

Until I started getting these voices, I never told anyone about it, I ignored them but they kept popping up, talking to me. Saying I was worthless. That I should give up on life and that no one loved me. They wish I wasn't born. They said that's why my dad left. Because he couldn't stand to have me as a son. So he left. So it's been all my fault since day one.

That's when everything changed.