Death University

Chapter 28

Chapter 28: All Yours

"J-Julia, let me e-explain... I..." Hindi ko maipagpatuloy ang sinasabi ko. I don't know where to start.

And when I looked at herv face, I could see anger. I feel so nervous right now. I think I deserved this because I lied to her! And I think deserve ko rin ito dahil ninakaw ko ang libro.

"Why did you steal this, Zaya? Why did you lie to me this whole time?!"

"J-Julia, I-I'm sorry—"

"I don't need your apology! I want answers to my questions!"

"I-I lied to you b-because I-I think hindi pa ito ang tamang panahon na s-sabihin ko sayo." Nakayuko kong sabi at nauutal.

I couldn't even look directly on her eyes! Malalaman na malalaman mo sa mga mata niya na matindi ang galit niya ngayon!

"Hinahanap-hanap ng lahat ng staff ng paaralang ito kung sino ang kumuha ng iniingatang libro ni Madame Selina tapos ikaw pala ang kumuha 'nun! All along, ikaw pala! Hindi mo alam kung ano 'tong panganib ang pinasok mo, Zaya! They will surely kill you! You're in a big trouble right now!" She shouted at me na para bang mabibingi ako.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't—"

"Walang kwenta 'yang sorry mo, Zaya... You are in a big trouble right now! Araw-araw, hinahanap kung sino ang kumuha ng librong iniingatan ni Madame Selina. And because it's you, delikado ang buhay mo!" She said devastatedly. "If we could just undone what is done... Kung pwede ka lang sanang tumakas mula sa lugar na 'to! Once they figure it out that it's you... they... they will.." Napaiyak siya.

Panibagong mga luha ang lumabas sa aking mga mata. Kahit anong sisi ko sa sarili ko na ako ang may kasalanan ng lahat-lahat, wala na akong magagawa. I can't undone what is done. I couldn't do anything to fix this problem. And now, I made my best friend worried. She's worried because of me. At namromroblema siya dahil sa akin.

"I-I'm so sorry, Julia. Namomroblema ka ngayon dahil sa'kin... But I should face this problem, myself. I don't want to burden you... K-Kung mamamatay man ako, t-then so be it."

"Are you out of your mind, Zaya?! What are you saying?! So be it? Seriously? Gusto mo ng mamatay?! Ayaw mong problemahin kita kaya kung mamamatay ka man, hahayaan ko lang? You're crazy! Life doesn't work like that!"

Mas nagalit si Julia dahil sa pinagsasabi ko. Baliw na kung baliw. I don't want to burden her with the problem I caused in the first place.

"J-Julia, l-let me be the one to handle my problem. Just... Just stay out of this. Ayokong mapahamak ka dahil sa ginawa ko."

"What are you saying, Zaya?! You are totally out of your mind—"

"Nababaliw na kung nababaliw, Julia. Pero ayaw kong ma-involve ka pa sa problema ko. Sabi mo nga diba, malaking panganib itong pinasukan ko. Alam ko naman na ako ang may kasalanan nitong lahat. I'm fucking curious about the damn book and now, I'm in a big trouble. So, let me face this on my own. Don't stress yourself out because of my problem."

"S-Sandali, Zaya, akala ko ba magtutulungan tayo sa kung ano man ang problemang meron tayo? B-But you want to face this problem of yours on your own? Now that I know of it, I want to help you—"

"Simula't sapol, alam ko na matindi itong kasalanang nagawa ko dahil kinuha ko ng walang permiso ang iniingatang libro ni Madame. But... what's done is done. I couldn't change anything." I said as firm as I could.

"Zaya, I'm just worried about you! Problemadong-problemado ako sa problema mo dahil for fuck's sake, Zaya, buhay mo ang pinag-uusapan dito! Buhay mo ang kikitilin nila! I don't want you to die! You're my best friend! You're a person I love!" She said, raising her voice too. Now, heavy tears came rushing out of her eyes.

"Maybe we should both just... just cool off our heads. But then, Julia, I need to face my problem on my own." I said, wiping the tears off my face. I then walked out of the bedroom and I went downstairs.

Nakita ko si Godwin na nakaupo sa sofa at nagulat siya nang makita ang aking itsura.

"W-What happened, Zaya?" Gulat niyang tanong at mukhang nag-aalala.

"M-Maybe you should comfort your girlfriend, Godwin. She's upstairs." Sagot ko sa kanya at pinigilan kong maiyak muli.

Hindi ko na hinintay ang sasabihin pa ni Godwin at lumabas na ako mula sa dorm. Hindi ko napigilang umiyak muli. I covered my face with both of my palms. Nararamdaman kong pinagtitinginan ako ng mga taong nasa paligid. Gusto ko munang pumunta sa isang tahimik na lugar. Lugar kung saan pwede akong mapag-isa...

And that is the fountain area. The only place I know of.

Umiyak ako ng umiyak nang naupo na ako sa bench sa harap ng fountain. Humagulgol ako ng humagulgol.

May narinig akong mga yapak kaya hininaan ko ang aking paghikbi.

"D-Demerine? Is that you?"

I turned to see who it is and it's Selton. I was stunned to see him. Why is he here? Mahilig din ba siya sa matatahimik na lugar? Katulad ko? Katulad ni MK? Wait... hold it, bakit ko naiisip ang lalakeng 'yun? But it's been like a week since I last saw him. Anyway, this isn't the time to think about him.

"A-Ako nga 'to," Sagot ko kay Selton sabay punas sa pisngi ko.

"Why are you crying? Sinong nagpaiyak sayo?" He asked me and he walked towards me. Tinignan kong maigi ang mukha niya at nag-aalala talaga siya.

"W-Wala 'to. N-Namimiss ko lang 'yung pamilya ko." Pagsisinungaling ko.

"Really? Parang hindi 'yan 'yung dahilan." He really doesn't look convinced at all.

"That's my reason," I insisted.

"Kahit ano man ang dahilan, it seems like you don't want to tell me about it. So, I wouldn't ask about it anymore. I'll just be here with you, dadamayan kita rito." Sabi niya sabay kuha mula sa bulsa niya ng panyong kulay dark blue.

Tinanggap ko 'yun. "T-Thank you... Pero hindi mo ako kailangang damayan dito. Maybe you have some important things to do."

"I don't have any important thing to do, Demerine, kaya hindi mo ako maaabala." He paused then said, "I'm all yours right now."

Natigilan ako sa huli niyang sinabi... What's with him? It feels different...

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