demented. {a.b} DISCONTINUED

Chapter 14

"What do you want to do when you grow up?" I asked, turning my direction towards him. 

"I haven't decided yet. Anything that'll get me through this world." he turned his face to the side, looking over at the walls of the coffee shop. 

"No, dreams, wishes?" I suggested. 

"Nope, I wasn't much of a dreamer. I honestly don't know what I'm going to do with my life after this." he reached over and took a sip of his coffee.

I didn't prefer coffee, so thankfully the shop had some tea. I moved my straw through the drink. 

"What about you?" he rested his cup back down on the table. 

"This is probably going to sound idiotic but when I was younger I always dreamed of being a princess. I mean, that was most little girl's dreams anywho. I still think about it though." I laughed. "I guess I always had this idea that prince charming was going to sweep me off my feet one day."

"It's adorable," Andy admitted, showing me a smile.

"It's a stupid idea. What I really want is to just settle down, get married and adventure the world. That's what I would love to do. To see the impossible and do the impossible." I explained. 

"I never took you for someone like that," he commented. "I like it. It shows you're not afraid."

"I'm only afraid of my own shadow," I added. 

"I'm here so you don't need to be afraid," he muttered.

I looked at him as saw him glance the other direction. That was possibly one of the sweetest things I have ever heard from someone. The fact that someone was actually interested in me, just being me, is crazy for me. Instead of me watching from the sidelines as my friends would get asked out, here I am with Andy. 

I mean, we're not even going out. But the fact that he's here with me is enough.

"Thank you, Andy." I smiled back at him. 

"I just wanted to tell you that. You don't have to face it alone. Any problem that you have with anyone, you can tell me. I'll solve it for you." he explained.

"Well, can you help me with my trig homework?" I said, smirking slightly.

"I mean if you really want me to. I'm not the best at math though." he chuckled. "This is why I like you. The fact that you're an actual decent human compared to all the assholes out here. You just know what to say to make me laugh or smile."

"Same with you, Andy," I answered, a blush beginning to form on my cheeks.

Was that the right thing to say? Was I rushing in too quickly? I wasn't sure at all.

There was silence between us for a couple moments. 

"Why does this keep happening?" I questioned.

"What do you mean by that?" Andy sipped his coffee, folding his hands on the cup.

"All these people dying..." I mumbled.

"They both deserved it. Both were assholes." He mentioned.

"Everyone deserves the chance to live even if they are assholes." I bit my lip, looking down. I didn't understand how Andy could think like that. Sure, I hate my teacher but I didn't want him to be murdered. Along with Melissa.... even if she killed herself. 

"This world is already messed up as it is. If anything, the person who killed your teacher is taking them out of this world... somewhere nice. Melissa must've thought the same and that's possibly why she killed herself." Andy explained.

"Somewhere nice? Do you think after this life our spirits go somewhere nicer?" I examined his face.

"I do in fact. The world we live is terrible, wars all over, everything is messed up here. But there, it's a place where everyone is happy... living free." he stated.

It was quite beautiful in fact. The way he described it made it seem like death was a joyous thing to go through. That maybe there's hope after death.

"I would be scared to die. Because no one for sure knows what happens to your spirit once you die." I shrugged.

"I guess so. I'm sure Melissa and he is okay... most likely happy where they are. That's why most people say they're in a better place." Andy picked his coffee, hovering it by his face.

"So you believe in God?"

He paused before taking a sip, quicking shaking his head. "No, not at all."

"Hmm.." I murmured as I took my straw into my hands and gulped down some of the tea. 

"Hmm?" Andy copied me as he lifted the cup, swallowing the rest of what was in there.

"Just thinking." I smiled, pulling my sleeves down so they were past my fingers.

"About?" 

"A lot of things. The people at school, my teachers, the guidance counselor, you." I mentioned. 

He laughed when I said the last word, sharing me a smile. 

"What's the guidance counselor doing exactly?" he asked. 

I finished my tea and threw away my cup as Andy waved to follow him out. He threw away his cup also then followed right behind me.

"She's pissing me off beyond compare. She got pissed at me because I didn't want to read Melissa's suicide note." I complained.

"Seriously? That's fucking stupid." Andy growled.

"Like does she expect me to just be okay with one of my friends- well, one of my ex-friends killing themselves?!" I raised my voice. "I literally had a panic attack in the guidance room because of it. And she had the nerve to tell me to calm down?"

"She has to realize that people can't just be okay with someone dying. It's most likely because she's never experienced pain like that before so she doesn't know how to react. I'm sure if someone close to her died, she would be acting the exact same as you. But because it hasn't happened to her, she has no idea how to feel about it." Andy elucidated. 

"I wish she understood how I felt. God, I can't believe her. Who the hell does that?" I sighed and leaned against the wall, groaning. "I'm just tired of it."

"Hey, hey, it's okay," Andy said and he stood next to me. "Don't worry about anything. Everything will eventually come through, I promise."

"You promise?"

"Yes."

I held out my pinky,"Pinky promise?" I laughed.

He chuckled also, putting out his pinky. "Pinky promise."