35. Confession

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(Rachel's POV)

'RACHEL! Where on earth were you?'

With a weak smile I greet my friends who are now sitting in the living area. They were all busy chatting when I entered the house and Ross spotted me as soon as I was visible to all of them. I thought I would be lucky to see an empty room so I can peacefully slid into mine, but these night owls are having other plans.

'Join us, Rachel. We were just dissing Louis about his work ethics.'

Jazz is giggling like a twelve-year-old. Just with a polite nod I walk to the kitchen to find something to drink and lean onto the breakfast table to hide behind darkness so I could slowly fade away from the attention. I am too tired to do all the talking after a dreadful day, but I cannot ignore my friends when they are having a nice time.

'Hey.'

'Hey, Aliya.'

'How are you holding up?'

Another slight grin gives her the answer she was looking for.

'Well... the boys are having a wonderful time here.' She knows me too well to know it time for a change of subject. And she did.

'That's good to hear.' I mumble.

'Liam was in the pool until Harry had to come and drag him out of it. We thought he might melt in there. Suppose he was a fish in his last birth.'

I stare at the rest of the group who are sipping coke and eating all the junk food they can find in here.

'Rachel-'

'Humm?'

'Urm... Can I ask you a question?'

'Hum.' Looking at my glass of water I say.

'You and...' She is hesitant. There's nothing to hide from her. Anything she wants to know I would tell her. The distance chattering does not interrupt our little talk under the dim lights. And I wait.

'You and... Niall... Urm... is there anything... I mean...' To my surprise no panic rushed inside my body. I am way calmer than her. She is collecting herself.

'Yes.' I answer, still my gaze upon my glass.

'What do you mean?' She is whispering.

'I'm not sure, Aliya.' Although I am not looking at her I know that she's now stunned by my answer.

'Not... not sure? What are you talking about?' She is confused. So am I.

'Do you remember Anita's Birthday party?'

'Yes?'

'And you said you were looking for me the whole night?'

She nods. Her eyes are now getting wider by each word.

'I was at the stadium. Alone.'

'And?'

'Niall found me playing his guitar.'

'Oh god, Rachel. Did he... did he do something to you? I'm gonna report this, Rachel! I'm gonna-'

'Calm down, Aliya. Nothing happened. He didn't...' I couldn't look into her face.

'NO! Something must have happened.' She is half whispering. Her palm is resting on my arm.

'He kissed me.' She takes away her hand.

'And... I... kissed him back.'

'Oh... Rachel.'

'It felt... wonderful.' for the first time I looks at her with confidence. It was wonderful. To be in his arms.

'I knew something's definitely wrong. When I saw how he looked at you and how he behaved after you left.' She shakes her head. And with a sigh she continues, 'He was all gloomy Rachel. We tried to cheer him up, but all he did was sat on the river bank and waited. And now I know it was you who he waited. And it didn't make sense at first, but when Zayn told me that he was also worried about him and that he saw how he tried to protect you from the hit I knew there's something going on between you two.'

'Zayn?'

'Yeah. The guys told us what happened. But then later when I went to pick some sheets for our indoor camping, he followed me saying he needed to talk to me about something. And he told about Uncle Paul's phone call and how shaken you were and how Niall backed you up. He was a little suspicious because knowing Niall for a long time they know when their friend's acting weird. Just like I did.'

Aliya smiles.

'Thanks, buddy. For everything.' leaving the glass on the table I say.

'That's what friends are for.'

'Where's he now?' Expecting to see my boyfriend I search around.

'In his room.'

It seems my loving friend has another burning question inside her.

'What is it Aliya?'

'When are you going to tell others?' The question of the day.

'I have nothing to hide to any of you. You know that Aliya. But I was afraid what might happen if the world starts to see things. And...' She looks concerned, 'you know...'

'He doesn't know, does he?' It is more of a fact than a question.

'Yes, and I don't know how he will react. About everything.'

'Rachel, if he truly likes you he will fight for you, not against you. You must tell him because I saw how hurt he was. He was confused and angry at himself because he didn't know how to look after you when you suddenly... you know... turned into "The mode". We already know about you, so we know how to support you. But imagine when the person who is in love with you sees you in a difficult status, they become helpless all of a sudden.'

'I see.' A defeated tone express my thoughts. She is right. Niall is sensitive and what happened today puts him in a tough place. And I caused it because I was selfish and ignorant. At least I must do him justice he wanted so badly, which he suppressed because I told him to wait for the right time.

Now is the right time. Niall... This is for you.

'Aliya... It's ok to tell others. But between the boys and you girls only. Please.' holding her hands I say and with another look at my oblivious cheerful friends in the living, I retire to my room.

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