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Toni sat in her fold out chair, fiddling with her hands. She wished meetings like this didn't help. It was the same recovery story over and over again, but for some reason, they were motivational.
They didn't seem to give enough motivation though. Unfortunately, Toni relapsed three days ago.
As she sits in her chair the guilt falls over her. All of the people here were trying so hard to stay clean, and yet she's sitting here pretending like she was trying as hard as them.
The clapping in the room interrupted Toni's thoughts. A man was walking up to the stand, holding a few papers.
He was cute. His brown suit matched his wild hair, and scruffy beard.
Toni sat up in her seat and watched him. He smiled slightly as the clapping died down.
"Hi," the man took a breath, "My name is John Frusciante, and uh, for many years I was a junkie."
Toni listened to what John had to say. Sometimes, she would get lost in his words. Something about a fourth dimension and spirits.
But when John said the words Toni needed to hear, he made eye contact through the crowd.
"And, it's okay to fail. It's okay to relapse, because at least you're here and you're alive. You get another chance to try again. To try to make yourself a better person."
With those closing words, John left the stage. The applause was a bit louder this time, and Toni joined in.
John took a seat to listen to the other presenters. He was a few seats down on Toni's row and she couldn't help, but to fix her eyes on him.
John obviously felt her stare and looked in Toni's direction. Toni snapped her eyes back toward the speaker. She was certain John caught her staring, but that wouldn't keep her from acting as if she wasn't.
Time ran along, and soon the meeting was over. It was set for the same time next week and everyone went their separate ways.
Toni had lost track of John in the crowd. It wasn't extremely large, not too many junkies like these kind of meetings, but he moved quickly. He was probably itching to get out of there as much as Toni was.
Toni stood in front of the building. Her hands were stuffed in her jacket pockets and her foot kicking around a small rock. She had called a cab five minutes before hand, but there was always that dreadful wait. With LA traffic, there's no telling how long it will actually be.
I could really use some dope. Toni thought, but a familiar scruffy voice took her away from her thoughts.
"Hey." It said.
Toni looked up and were met with the gorgeous of John Frusciante.
"Hey.." she replied breathlessly. Was this what's it like to have your breath taken away by someone?
