In My Eyes (Dan X reader)

Chapter 51 ~ An Internal Conflict

I link together one of the lego bricks on the surface in front of me, then turn to Dan. "Why the hell do you even have this?" I question, now looking for a piece I misplaced.

"It was one of those 4:30 in the morning buys when your brain thinks something is a good decision" he shrugs.

"Why Harry Potter Legos?" I question him further, laughing a bit.

"Just reminds me of my childhood. This model of Hogwarts is going to be the best ever built!"

My phone begins to ring next to me. I finish placing the brick and look at the caller ID, which reads Pj 🎨.

"Hello?" I greet after answering it. Dan mouthes the words "Who is it?" to me and I put a finger to my lips, implying him to be quiet.

"Hey (Y/N). What are you doing right now? Do you want to help me with a short film I'm working on?"

"Hey Pj. I would love to, but I can't right now. I'm building a lego replica of Hogwarts, as weird as it sounds, with Dan" I respond. He goes quiet, then draws a sharp breath.

"So you guys are friends again?" he asks me, his voice almost a whisper.

"No. We're back together. We went to dinner and patched things up" I smile a bit, but thinking deeply. Again he goes silent.

"Pj?" I ask, thinking maybe he hung up. 

"Oh yeah. I'm still here" he sighs, his voice shaking.

"Is there anything else you want to talk about?" I ask.

"Let me know if Dan breaks your heart again. Don't ignore me like last time. Please."

"He won't do that silly" I laugh slightly.

"Promise me though?"

"I promise" I pledge in confusion.

"Okay, I'll let you go. But come by later for the short film?" He asks.

"Will do. Bye"

"Bye"

He hangs up. I briefly explain what happened in the conversation, then I continue building. Dan's ranting about something, but all I'm thinking about are Pj's mannerisms. Why was his voice shaking? Why did he stop speaking for a bit. Then it hits me.

Does Pj like me? In a romantic way?

I've assumed all of his gestures were friendly, but now that I think about it, maybe not. I start feeling anxious.

"(Y/N)!" Dan yells, snapping me out of my thoughts. I shake my head and look at him.

"Sorry" I apologize to Dan.

"No, you're fine. You just look upset. What are you thinking about?" he asks, his eyes full of curiosity.

"I'm okay. I'm just having an existential crisis. That's all" I lie. I immediately begin hating myself for lying. Dan's a jealous person, his friendship with Pj will be ruined if I tell him. Pj is still my friend too. 

"Oh. I understand. I'll go get the ice cream. It helps me a lot" he smiles sweetly, making me feel even more guilty. Should I tell him? No. He'll figure it out eventually. If its that obvious, he will right? Who knows? I could be wrong this whole thing. I'll just forget about it.

Dan returns with a tub of my favorite ice cream, two spoons and a fuzzy blanket. He wraps the large blanket around the two of us and we sit facing each other, the ice cream between us.

"Talk to me" he leans in, showing he's listening. I decide on talking about a recent one I've been having.

"One day I'll be forgotten. After I die, I won't matter to anyone" I sigh. Now I really am in an existential crisis. 

"Sh*t" Dan mumbles, immediately reaching for one of the spoons. I do the same, taking a large bite of the ice cream.

"So. Any advice?" I ask, taking another bite.

"I don't know. The good news is you aren't in this one alone" he smiles sadly. After a few minutes of shoveling the delicious frozen dessert into our faces, Phil walks in.

"Hey guys! What are you doing? You both look upset" Phil asks with concern.

"Oh you know, having a double existential crisis" I manage to say without ice cream dribbling out of my mouth.

"Oh. Well... I'm going to go get some food" he says, backing out of the room slowly, causing both Dan and I to chuckle. We put the ice cream away, and watch movies for the rest of the day, relieving our minds from the mental strain of philosophical thoughts.