20 Days In His Bedroom

Chapter Thirty nine

"I've to go now." He says and leaves the room. What did he just say? He said he wants me? Why am I so desperate like that? Twy, he is not your type. Not that I think like that but actually everything I know about him is always bad. But I love him. I don't know how, why and when that happened but it actually happened. I love this guy so much. My love to him is increasing every day although he doesn't change and I know that we can't bear each other for more than minutes but I want to live with him forever.

When did I start to think like that? I almost gave up to him so easily. He doesn't love me or even show that he likes me. But aren't keeping me in his place, buying me food and clothes, talking with me sometimes enough? He even got jealous when Jack talked to me, right? He seemed like that. He said I want you and don't leave. Twy, wake up. Yes, I love him but Kyle is like a dream. And this dream can't be real, okay? I'm not like him and I don't know what he might do if I show him my love. He may hurt me and I will lose him. Lose him? Why would I care about losing him after he hurts me?

No! No! No! How do I think like that? Forget Kyle, Twy! Forget him. I now want my mom and dad. Do I really do? Oh my God. It's shame. But sometimes I think they wouldn't have let me live this life or experience it. Well, they wouldn't definitely have let me live with Kyle. But Kyle is gentle. He's a man. He didn't touch me. Yes, he kissed me but still he didn't crave for more. Not that I would allow him. But sometimes I wonder why! Why doesn't he want more? Thanks God he doesn't.

Twy, you are thinking about Kyle again? No, you must be sick. He played in your mind so much and it's scary.

♡

I woke up the next day. I found Kyle leaving me a note on the bed side table.

Hey Twy,

It's the first time I write a letter so I don't know how shit they write it. Whatever, uhm...
Actually I had to leave. I'll rent a nearby house. This time I'm not forcing you to come and live with me but you've to know that you are always welcomed here. I'll send you the address soon. I know that the decision isn't easy at all for you but you can choose the less dangerous one to stay with ;)

Kyle

Tears fall on my cheeks. It hurts so much. He left me here alone. He never loved me. I thought he was jealous as Jack was talking to me. I thought that he could love me or like me at least. He doesn't love me. He doesn't. I told you he would hurt you but he hurt me so early. I want to cry forever. I'm so afraid. I want my parents. I want to leave here. I don't want to see his face again. Why am I overreacting? He's not my boyfriend. He's not my husband. Maybe because I was believing my dream. I'm stupid. I'm stupid. I crawl on the bed and cover myself with the blankets although it's sunny outside but I feel so afraid. I'm here with Jack alone in the same damn house. I don't know what he might do. He is not Kyle. But even Kyle left. God damn them all. I didn't deserve all that.

I've to get up. I've training classes today at MacDonald. I should be there in fifteen minutes. But I don't wanna go. I should.

I cry so hard that I've never cried like this before. Is this love? I hate love if this is the love.

I arrive at MacDonald late. I know it's not good especially it's the first time but thanks to Kyle. I'm grateful I didn't see Jack this morning. I've thought a lot but actually didn't find a decision. Should I stay with Jack to tease Kyle? Or should I go and stay with him? I'm in no way gonna stay with Kyle after what he did, he threw me with Jack alone and he said he's dangerous. But I don't know Jack and what he might do. It's awful. I can't afford to rent an apartment and I don't know how and where. Hopefully I won't have to rent one because I'm supposed to meet mom and dad soon.

"I'm so sorry." I say to Emma once I entered MacDonald and saw her.

"Okay." Her lips are twisted and she seems unhappy.

"I'm so sorry. I was...I didn't sleep well yesterday so-"

"It's fine girl." She pats my shoulder and smiles. I love her already.

Emma taught me almost everything. I found it hard at first but she said I will get used to it quickly.

I check my phone once I finished the long day. Emma said I'm doing well and that I would just have another training day.

I find a message from Kyle. Yaaay. Should I even open it? I don't know. Maybe it's urgent..

*how was your day?*

Like really! He wants to how was my day! Maybe he should ask me, did Jack fuck you or not yet? Could they be tricking me? They're friends. Maybe they made this show in front of me and then....No no I know Kyle wouldn't do that to me. He would have done that days ago.

*Twy!*

He's online. Oh my God.

*are you there?🤔*

*I am not* I send him back.

*😑*

I won't reply. I should be cold. He deserves more. I sit on a bench on the street.

*so, I asked how was your day?*

I don't reply.

*Twy? What's up?*

*Twy, stop that or I will come right to you now*

*none of your busniess* I finally reply.

He calls me. Oh my God. Should I answer?

I answer unfortunately.

"Hey what do you want?" I say harshly as much as I could.

"What's wrong with you?" He says from the other line. He makes me mad.

"You're annoying me and I'm working now." I lie.

"You are not. Because you finished training period about five minutes ago and twenty seconds." He says. How could he know?

"How did you know?" I ask before I even realize.

"Because I asked about your schedule."

"Why would you even ask about it? And how could they give you my schedule?" I'm confused but happy.

"Because I am Kyle. I just simply said that you're my girlfriend and want to know your schedule."

"How could you even do that? Why? You're lying." I bit my lip. I sincerely wouldn't like him saying that at all. It feels awkward. I would have told him my time table if I knew he would do all that.

"Who cares? They are not your parents, they wouldn't punish you."

"Okay. Bye now." He makes me mad and I have to think well away from him.

"Where are you going?" He says quickly.

"What do you want now?"

"I missed you. I know it's weird and you may don't believe me but that's how I feel."

I close my eyes to listen to every word he says.

"Where are you now?" He asks.

"Why do you care? You left and that's it." I yell.

"I left because I didn't want to force you to stay with me if you believe I am dangerous."

"Aha. I see. You decided to leave. Why are calling now?" I shout. I notice that several people are staring at me now. They don't have Kyle in their life, they won't understand how I feel now. Well I feel kind of happy having Kyle in my life. But he hurt me. Well he still called me which means he cares, right?

"I'm sorry I annoyed you. I just wanted to hear your damn voice but it's fine now. Go see whatever hell you would like to do." His voice isn't harsh. It's soft but still he can't talk to me like this.

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Love you all♡