Forever Yours

Gone

The music above has little to nothing to do with the chapter but it is really pretty and beautiful and I think it represents Clarke and Lexa perfectly.  Be warned it does have one curse word (f***) in it but it is still a beautiful song and tribute.

Lexa

I waited at breakfast for nearly forty five minutes, growing more concerned by the second.  Finally I stood and made my way back towards our room.  Opening the door it was evident she wasn't there.  Her bag that she had packed last night was gone from where she'd left it and I made my way towards the bed.

On the end table was a small piece of folded paper.  I picked it up, unfolding it, and read it:

Lexa, 

I'm really sorry about this but I can't look at you and tell you good bye.  I can't look at you knowing it could be the last time.  I want to promise that I'll come back to Polis after this but if even one thing goes wrong I might never come back again.

I feel horrible for leaving like this but I can't go to breakfast and act like everything's normal  just to turn around and leave.  I can't justify what I'm doing, there's no way to.  I'm taking the coward's way out.  And Lexa, if you want to hate me for this I understand.

If you're still reading this then, since I know I might not get the chance to in person, I have to tell you something.  I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want to force you into saying it back, if you ever said it to me I wanted it to be because you truly felt it, but now that I know I might never get another chance I have to.  I love you.

-Clarke

I could see where tears had fell on the paper as she'd written, though luckily none of it had been ruined and I could make out all the words.

"I love you too." I murmured as I finished.

Just like I had prepared for my death going into the battle with Roan, she had prepared for her death now.  She had said the thing she couldn't say before because she didn't know if she'd come back.  I closed my eyes, remembering how close I'd come to letting those same words leave my tongue when I thought I was going to die after I'd been shot.  I hadn't though.  I hadn't because it would have only made it harder on her if I had died.

Now she was gone, she was returning to her people, with the chance of her death hanging over her and she wanted to make sure I knew how she felt in case that did happen.  "Please come back to me." I murmured.

"I'll be waiting for you the moment you return." My voice echoed in my mind.  I hadn't promised her we'd still be standing at the end of this because I hadn't known if we would - I hadn't known how this would turn out.

And now, "I promise.  We'll still be standing at the end of this." I murmured.