Fin's Claim

Self Discovery

"Why Fin? Why couldn't he have lived?" Her hands are wrapping around her stomach as if trying to feel him still inside her.

"I don't know Meela."

Walking away following the shadowed path that will lead her to the dead. It's an eerie feeling I get that makes the hairs on my neck stand on end.

"Meela." Her body angles towards me.

"It's alright Fin. I just need some time out here alone. I'll be in soon. I'll feed her when she's ready for me." Watching Meela squeeze her eyes tight, jaw clenched as if the thought brings her physical pain to nurse something that's not her own.

Watching her walk away with a slow gait, shoulders are hunched with the powerful look of a heavy burden she's carrying on them. She looks unsteady on her feet, an almost trip before she rights herself.

This is so wrong on so many levels. Everything feels wrong.

Opening the door to Victoria's room Lana is there talking with the baby as if she can answer her back. The healer is laughing out loud while the pup's eyes are glued to her face watching, learning.

"Alpha Fin we were just having a hilarious conversation." She looks at the infant giving her a small cuddle before getting up handing her to me.

"Victoria needs to start increasing the feeding. I want you to take the night time feedings over from Meela. Are you going to be able to do it?" Looking down at the now restless pup in my arms who's face does not look happy with the change in routine. The first start of a cry rips through the small room. Her face scrunches up into a fury that is hard to stand up against.

"Stop." Lana is touching her forehead with just the tip of a finger. The current of power tingles my skin, stopping the crying instantly. I never realized she held so much unassuming strength.

"You need to show her who's boss or she will walk all over you. She's too little to understand what she's doing right now so you have to teach her that she can't just throw fits whenever she feels like it, she might hurt some unsuspecting wolf."

"She's a pup Lana? They do this." Lana starts laughing where tears are starting to come out of the corner of her eyes.

"You have no idea what you have in your arms do you? But you're right; she is just a pup for now, but in a blink of an eye, she will be the most powerful living creature this world will ever see. She needs to understand it's not always her way that there is a give and take." Ominous voice replaces laughing, dilating black irises consume the white before flashing back to the regular spring green.

The pup with no name just regards me with eyes that look like they are made of the blue ice that lives in the coldest part of the north.

"Look at her pout; cute isn't it?" Lana is giving her another stern look, trying to hold the smile from forming on her lips.

Why can't Victoria be up for this? I can't even explain this to her it's in the realm of the most bizarre.

When my eyes fall on Victoria's face, I notice a wisp of the softest pink on her cheeks. Her yellowing color still there but the rot is less pronounced. More of a vibrant stink.

How do I ever begin to tell her what I've done?

Constriction, invisible hands around my throat squeezing my airway closed, not being able to pull in the air.

My pious sermons throughout the years, shouting out my self-righteous indignation to her, to make her feel worthless, to make her feel dirty, to make her feel like a whore. I have just done the same thing that I have been preaching against.