Critique: Maiden Heart Zwei

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Title: Maiden Heart Zwei

Author: Canislupus54

Genre: Fantasy, Magic, Adventure, Swords, (Fanfiction)

Cover: Needs a cover....

Summary: It's simple, but not enough. Also you should probably mention more for people who don't know the anime, Maiden Heart Zwei Tri. 

Chapter (Prologue): I really liked this. The imaginary was on point and you didn't have unnecessary information. I do suggest though you put for the break 'Years later' or 'in the far city of {Blank}' I got a little confused when it switched over. 

Chapter 1: Good, Good. I really enjoyed this chapter. I can see potential with this story. I have a feeling you enjoy this story. I notice your writing is a bit different in this one compared to 'The Elf Princess'. You should maybe say sooner that she is a squire and explain what a squire is. 

Overall rate: 3.5 💙💙💙

I really wanted to give a 4 so 3.5 . You need a cover. Your summary needs some fixing. Your prologue was good except for the break, explain why the view changed from Lucia to Ellie. Chapter 1 was amazing. This is actually the first story that is in third person that I can understand. I have a hard time understanding Third Person. If I have the time I might read on. Keep Writing. 

Rating Scale: Rate from 1-5
💙💙💙💙💙
1: Poor/Needs MAJOR editing
2:Almost there/ needs fixing/need practice
3: Good/Needs a little editing
4:Good/Needs a little editing/may recommend/may read on
5: EXCELLENT/will recommend to followers, friends/may read on

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