Don't Whistle Past the Graveyard

Ch. Twenty-One

I was watching out the window at the zombies still shambling through the streets when Shane came up behind me. He put his hands on my waist and kissed the side of my neck. "Have you seen my shirt?"

Biting my lip to keep from smiling, I said, "Um... I think I might have thrown it over there?" I pointed over my shoulder, still looking at the zombies. It was kind of creeping me out, the way they just kind of... wandered. I didn't like that they didn't seem to have any sort of purpose or destination.

I still don't, if only because it makes the herds hard to predict. There seems to be very little that drives the zombies. If they aren't actively going after something alive, then they just sort of shamble around, and that makes it difficult to know when you're going to run into a large number of them.

They have no patterns. Yet another thing that separates them from the living.

Shane looked over to where I had pointed and asked, "Were you aiming for the top of the wardrobe?"

I laughed and turned to see him using the edge of the wardrobe to boost himself up and snag his shirt. He put it back on and smiled at me before asking, "How is it out there?"

"About the same. They're just kind of... walking." I watched him pick up the binoculars and look out the window. "Kind of crazy, isn't it?"

"Mm," he said. "World's always been crazy. Now it's just really in your face about it, you know?" Shane shifted in a way that seemed a little uncomfortable, but all he said was, "They're still heading north. Not really slowing down."

"What do we do if they decide to stop?" I asked. I stood next to him, and he shifted again.

Shane shrugged. "We'll get out of here one way or another. I'm not worried though since they're still moving. One crisis at a time right? Let's not borrow trouble thinking about a what if."

I sat on the bed with a sigh, playing with the edge of the red and blue checked quilt. Shane looked at me for a long moment, his face unreadable. He swallowed hard and rubbed the back of his neck.

With an only-kind-of-nervous smile, I asked, "What Shane?"

"Well, I, uh," Shane sat next to me. "I know it's um... it's a little late but are you, uh... are you on.." Shane cleared his throat, a flush creeping up the side of his neck.

I watched him struggle for a moment longer, completely confused, before something clicked into place.

"Oh!" I laughed and Shane looked up, toward the window.

"It's not funny, Raleigh," Shane said, his voice as strained as I'd ever heard it. "There are no doctors. No hospitals. There... there's no way that's even remotely safe!" Shane looked at me finally and for the first time since I'd known him, he actually looked panicked.

If he hadn't looked so scared and it wasn't so sweet, I would have laughed again. Instead, I turned to where I was facing him fully and placed a hand on either side of his face. He covered my hands with his, eyes very large and I said, "You don't have to worry about that."

His panic turned to confusion, then to anger, and he said, "Do I look like the kind of guy who would walk away? I wouldn't have done that before. Why would I now?"

That did make me laugh and I looked up at the ceiling, then back down at him. This was something I hadn't thought about in so long, I wasn't entirely sure how to explain it. I decided to keep it simple. "No. No, I mean..." I bit my lip and looked at him. "I... can't."

"Can't?" Shane echoed, his hands moving down to circle around my wrists.

"I can't get pregnant. I, um, when I was a kid I was in a car wreck. There was... substantial damage and, well..." I trailed off, looking down.