our fall in may||BWS (completed)

Chapter 57

*Five Months Later*

After May had a break down in the hospital, the next day she had our baby removed. We had a funeral and buried Imogen in our towns cemetery. Have you ever seen a baby coffin? It's depressing just seeing one, never mind knowing its your baby in there. (a/n theres a fucking wood spider creeping across the floor help. soz back to the story)

There's nothing worse than losing a child, even if the child was still unborn. May and I cried and cried and cried. We fought more than ever. I would leave for three days and come back. May dropped out of school. She she didnt speak to me unless it was to yell, fight, get something from the store or blame me for Imogen's death.

She hadn't said 'I love you' back since before the loss. I couldnt hug her. I couldnt kiss her. I couldnt comfort her. She sleeps in the bed, I sleep in the spare bedroom. 

My nightmares have come back. They wont leave. I wake up screaming and May just bangs on the wall, telling me to shut up.

Linda watched my pain and told me to leave May. How could I ever leave her? She needs me and I need her. We saved each other. We're meant to be together. 

But, its lost now. 

I don't feel our spark. I feel nothing but an empty bed and the house I spent days proofing for May. I don't paint anymore. Or draw. I haven't since the loss. Im empty.

I was Bradley Simpson. Now, Im not sure who or what I am, other than a depressed shell. 

_____________

I stood in front of May while she sat on the couch. She was curled up in a green blanket, wearing a white tank top and pajama pants. Her hair was strings down her shoulders and back. The blank stare she held at the ground was painful to see.

But I have a mission.

I took a deep breath. "I'm leaving, May."

Tonelessly, stare not moving, she said "Get milk."

I sighed through my nose. "I dont mean the store, Mayella."

"What do you mean?" she sounded flat still, then her tone changed to angry. "And don't call me that!"

"I'm going to England." I tapped the suitcase next to me.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she demanded. "I'm not going there. I'm not leaving this house, never mind the country."

"I never said you were coming." I whispered and her jaw dropped.

"What the fuck, Bradley?!" she shoots up from her seat.

"Im going to England to live with my family." I said weakly. "This isnt working Mayella. I'm sorry, but we both know it hasnt since we lost her."

May's breathing was erratic as she stared in my direction. Through clenched teeth, she spoke "Don't you talk about her."

"You act like you're the only one affected by this, and I'm sick of it. You don't touch me, you don't say you love me and you don't even speak to me."

May looked appalled. "Touch you? What do you want sex Bradley? Too fucking bad! I wanted a baby! Did I get that? Nope! Life isnt fair. Build a bridge and get over-"

"I don't want sex, Mayella!" I tugged at my hair. "I want to hug you, and hold you when we cried! I want to be able to sleep in the same bed as you! I want you to talk about your day, and what you feel because this hole we're both in, I'm trying to dig out and you're just digging deeper. I'm done with the depression. I went through it my whole life and when Im finally out of it, Im put right back in." I pulled up the handle of the suitcase.

Something snapped in May then. Her unfocused eyes seemed to open wider and become glassy. Her lips quivered and I look down.

"Don't leave me." she begged. "I promise I can change. (A/N that stay reference tho) I will do anything. I'll say I love you. I promise I will."

"Say it Mayella. Say 'I love you Bradley' and I will stay." I demand and let go of the handle and crossed my arms over my chest.

"I...I...lo..." she cleared her throat and I felt the pain through my chest like an unchained beast. "I..lo-"

"The house and your food will be paid for. I'll send checks." my voice broke as tears ran down my cheeks silently. "See a doctor or something May. You need help. Call me when you do."

I turned to the door as May cried again, louder and harder. "Don't go!" she screamed at me while I led to the door.

"Goodbye May. I love you."

I leave.

___________

T H E    E N D 

Seriously tho. Im not kidding. This is the last chapter. Bradley leaves, May cries, the end.

kidding this shit show aint over yet. 

Sorry I havent updated in 75 years. I was in the hospital all summer. Too long of a story, but a hashtag on Twitter was made for me :') 

#TheVampsVmForRose

I nearly cried when I saw it. I have the best friends in the whole universe.

Kk bye

-Rose