the diary | hummels/lewandowski

26

a/n: I think I'm gonna change the face claim for the billionth time to the old French actress Sonia Petrovna. At this point it really doesn't matter though, I just felt she would be more appropriate seeing as she stars in an Italian movie called "La Prima Notte di Quiete" in which an art/poetry teacher falls in love with his 20 year old student (her). anyways here's a nice, long chapter :)

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It was late at night. Carina couldn't sleep at all. She didn't like being alone in the dark—she was always in a room with either Mats or Lucy, sometimes Robert—and it wasn't until recently that she realized this was because solitude more or less frightened her.

She had refrained from joining Mats in the bed because they usually couldn't keep their hands off of each other, and making love to someone while your grandmother was in the room next door wasn't a brilliant idea. Add on that this man was 11 years your senior and your professor, and it was even worse.

Carina sighed and sat up. She had never really taken the time to take that in. Her and Mats's relationship seemed so natural to her that she had almost forgotten about how clandestine and taboo it was—or was supposed to be. And Mats, being so phlegmatic, never himself expressed concern about being caught or the consequences of being caught.

Carina climbed out of the bed and decided that she could use a glass of water. She hadn't even eaten dinner with everyone else that night, because she was too busy moping in her room. She had insisted to Mats that she wasn't hungry, but when he told her it was Giovanna that had made pasta and salad, Carina cracked down—she had missed her grandmother's cooking. So she asked him to bring her a plate. She didn't want anyone seeing her.

Because she had eaten in her room and not in the kitchen, Carina didn' know where it was. She was wondering down the staircase when she turned a random hallway, then another. The house didn't look this big from the outside, she thought. She spotted a room, dimly lit, a few doors down. She walked towards it, curiously. Mats must've heard her footsteps, because he exited the room and closed the door before staring at her silhouette.

"Carina, is everything alright?"

Carina instantly knew that he was hiding something in that room. She grew curious. Mats never hid anything from her. "I was just trying to find the kitchen," she responded.

Mats breathed out. "Okay. Come on, then. This house is a bit maze-like. It can be confusing in the dark."

Carina felt Mats intertwine their fingers before he eagerly led her away from the room, into the kitchen. He gave her a glass of filtered water before leaning against the counter and staring at her. Even in the dim lighting, Carina could tell that his eyes were dark. That meant there was something he wanted, or desperately longed to accomplish. It meant he was eager. She looked down at her attire, or more, her lack thereof—seven weeks pregnant, and her body still looked perfectly fine in a pair of white lace panties and a thin, translucent camisole.

After a few more moments of quiet eye contact, Mats practically lurched at her. She gasped, then put her hand on his chest. "Mats, stop it. We can't—oh," a groan escaped her mouth as Mats placed his hands between her thighs. How long had it been since he'd really touched her? Days, weeks, or months? It felt like the latter; in actuality, it was only the first. Hesitantly, she pushed his hand away, but by then he was already kissing her neck. She let out a whimper. "Mats, my grandmother is in this house."

Mats pulled away and kissed her as he spoke. "So? She's asleep—and if we're quiet, she won't hear us."

Carina groaned. "I will not fuck you in a room where the same food that goes into my mouth is prepared."