Grudges - Joshler

12

note- trigger warning (homophobic slur & parental fight)

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Josh wakes up disoriented and for a second he has no fucking clue where he is and how he got there. He stares up at the ceiling confused, but he knows he's in his bed, he's stared up at the same ceiling one too many times to not recognize it. He's just beginning to come back to reality when he feels someone's breath on his neck and the press of a warm body curling into him, trying to get comfortable. He momentarily panics because he did not have a one night stand out of pity for how shitty his love life is. He'd straight up punch himself if he did that.

He looks over and is relieved when he doesn't see a stranger and sees Tyler's sleeping face instead, mouth parted as a soft snore makes its way out of his throat and the night before comes back to him in such a rush it gives him a headache.

"Oh, fuck." Josh whispers to himself, looking over to the other side of the room where Brendon was lumped up in his bed. He uses the arm that's not being used as a pillow by Tyler to move the sheets up and when he sees the name above his knee, he drops it down again. "Fuck."

Josh never thought he'd get the chance to have a threesome with both his boys and here he was after the fact freaking the fuck out on the inside instead of celebrating.

What was his life, honestly?

When he saw Rami at the party, he didn't know what he was thinking when he went up to him. He wanted to get high, sure, but when he asked for ecstasy he honestly didn't mean to. He didn't have money either and when Rami brought him to his room to explain to him why it wasn't a good idea, he just fell to his knees and just. Yeah.

Logic, right?

He didn't know why he thought that was the way to go about the situation, but it worked, didn't it? Josh got his drugs and Rami got his satisfaction. It was a win-win for the both of them.

But he didn't think he and Tyler would get another tattoo, let alone their names. He didn't think they'd tell each other they loved one another. He didn't think they'd have a threesome with Brendon.

Tyler loves him, though. He loves him. Not Jenna, not some random girl, him.

He looks over at Tyler's angelic face again, taking it all in. Tyler admitted he wasn't completely straight last night too and Josh can't help the way his heart is swelling up. He'd wanted this for years and he was finally getting what he deserves; some good in his life. He was tired of getting bad news on bad news.

Josh checks the clock on the desk (he has no fucking clue where his phone is) and snorts when he sees it's past 4pm. They had slept through their Sunday and if any of them had homework then that would suck. They could have a mass study date anyway or better yet, maybe Tyler would want to go on a date with him now that he was single.

His eyes widen when he gets the idea; Tyler probably wasn't ready to go out with him again, he'd probably feel like hell when he woke up.

Josh moves his arm away from Tyler's head letting him drop it on the pillow instead. He whines, grabbing for him to cuddle, but Josh is already out of the bed. Tyler shifts and Josh panics again, thinking quickly and handing him his pillow to cuddle with, hoping he wouldn't wake up or notice.

He watches Tyler settle his arms around the pillow and he holds his breath until he snuggles into it. He lets the breath out and goes to turn toward Brendon when he spots Donnie.

Donnie who was staring at him with a knowing look, like he could read his mind which was outrageous because well, Donnie's a cat. He can't know what he's thinking, that's impossible.