It's High School (Completed)

Chp.17~ Grudges

"Caleb's POV"

With January came the first week of band practice: Monday through Friday, four to seven, in the student center, and the true start of our gig season. As much as I loved being in a band, this part of the year was usually hell, because I also had guitar lessons from eight to nine on Tuesdays and Fridays. In other words, my life was about to be exhausting.

The only thing good about have a busy schedule was that by the end of the day I wouldn't have time wallow in my self pity, I'd be too tired and fall asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. But I needed the distraction. Ever since the start of the second semester, it was as if Alex Wagner was everywhere.

We passed each other at least once between each period, he sat beside me everyday at lunch, and he'd come up with the stupidest conversation starters just to get a few words out of me. Then ten minutes before band rehearsal, I'd see Alex walking past on his way to the locker room, after that, it was singing and strumming and reading nonstop for the next three hours. The guys on the band were nonchalant and laid back. A couple of them went to Rosemarie and the others were home schooled.

It was Monday, and as soon as I said it was good time to go, the boys rushed out of the student center, hoping to beat the rain that was obviously coming. The sky got darker and darker by the minute, and the trees blew heavily in the wind. Everybody except for me had already left, but I stayed behind to put everything up and lock the student center.

"You guys sounded good." A voice spoke behind me. I was almost too sure of who it was, and in a split second I was overwhelmingly annoyed that Alex had first, watched me and second, was talking to me, but weirdly I couldn't help but want to look back and gaze into his blue eyes. Alex didn't know it, but talking to him was as if the world fell onto my lap. I didn't understand why I react the way I do when he speaks to me. He was a nice guy, there was no reason to just suddenly stop and drop him, but him not being around me as much would be kinda cool too.

"Thanks." I muttered underneath my breath. I pulled my hoodie over my head and grabbed my guitar case, ready to walk right past him without another word.

"Thanks buddy!" Alex's voice mocked my own. I could feel tension in my rising.

"I said thanks."

"Them maybe you should speak up?"

"What the hell is your problem?" I snapped, lashing around with a glare and hoping that I was close enough that my case could hit him. Alex twisted his head with a confused stare, un-bothered by my sudden aggression towards him, "I don't have one," he shrugged, then chuckled dryly. "But it seems that you do." Alex gestured towards me. He folded his arms in front of his chest and waited on my reply. His slugged smile and bright eyes held onto my own. I blinked, trying to not show any signs of emotions to his sly remark. "I don't have a problem."

Again, Alex chuckled, " Are you sure? Ever since I met you, you caring around this grudge. You do this to me all the time, even to your closest friends." Alex words rang in my ears, he stepped closer, still with his intense look. "Why do you do that?" He paused for just a moment, "you don't care that I'm gay right?"

My head floated with choices of words to say. Obviously I didn't care, but there was something there that disturb me. It wasn't the type of disturbing like a pimple-popping video, or a smelling locker room after football practice, but the words that floated around my head still weren't the answer I was looking for. Instead I just answered with, "S-sure." I accidentally stuttered, mentally palm-facing myself.

Alex nodded his head, "Okay then."

I took in a deep breath through my nose in an attempt to calm my nerves and reword my sentence, "I really don't, I don't know why I said it like that."