DIVISION 52 - BOOK I

CHAPTER XVII

I no longer felt the pathetic sympathy I held only for myself. She had lived this life and pain every day. Lived the life of a killer all for it to fall away to nothing. I had no clue to what end.

In that moment I knew I couldn't take her life. I let the dagger fall form my fingers and into her lap. Her eyes never left mine. Not for a moment.

"Now..." she drifted off. "–I can't stand to see such hatred in your eyes." She said emotionless. "Hate is a consuming thing. You're meant for better than this. Which is why—" she picked the blade back up and held it up to me, "—my life is yours to take."

I watched her in horror. "Revenge is also a consuming thing!" I snapped as I grabbed the dagger and flung it across the room. She stared at me in shock and disbelief.

"You think that's what I want?" I growled down at her as I pressed both hands on either side of the chair, trapping her. "Another death? All I've seen since I've been here is death. Is there nothing more? Is that the only thing in your life that holds meaning anymore?" I all but snarled down at her, only inches away from her face.

She listened to me silently and watched my eyes more intently than ever. They held something more in them but I couldn't fathom what.

"Not the only thing." She breathed.

"What then? Why do—" The question died on my lips as she closed the remaining space between us and pressed her lips against mine.

I froze.

Then every thought fell away.

The moment the warmth of her crashed into me I lost my mind all over again. It set every nerve on fire and left nothing behind. The cause of my life falling apart, the ruthless killer and stunning creature that filled my nightmares was now kissing me like I was the air to her lungs.

Then I was kissing her back.

Her hands found the side of my face, my hair and then my waist. As if she couldn't draw me close enough. Our breathing was ragged in seconds as our lips explored the each other. There were so many unsaid words being explained in a few actions. Her lips travelled down my neck and I gasped in air both out of pleasure and need. My hands remained placed on either side of the chair, gripped so tightly, so that I had some anchor to the world.

When her lips found mine again she drew up from the chair in a swift motion and picked me up easily. Without thinking I hissed in pain, the injuries to my ribs and stomach were protesting in sharp stabs.

She instantly froze and drew back to gauge my face.

A frown appeared on her face and I knew it was guilt that tore through her. I had every right to call her out on it–yet I didn't. Very carefully she carried me to the bed, with my legs still wrapped around her. She lay me down slowly and hovered above me without allowing any of her weight to press against me.

"It's nothing." I muttered, watching her eyes scan my face for more pain.

"It would be nothing if I hadn't left you there—" I silenced her with a finger pressed against her lips. She stilled under me.

"It's already clear you destroyed my life." I uttered dryly.

A dark smirk appeared on her mouth but it didn't quite reach her eyes.

"I'm not exactly good for your life expectancy." She whispered with that famous humour entering her voice.

"Mmm?" I mumbled innocently, "I never would have guessed." I angled her jaw down and focused on those eyes that could consume. "But I can't seem to get rid of you."

She rolled her eyes and suddenly shifted off me to lie beside me. Shoulder to shoulder the crime lord and the emperor. I snorted lightly. She glanced sidelong at my face.

"This is madness." She muttered. "Who you are. Who I am..."

"We've literally lost our minds." I agreed.

A moment of silence passes before we both laughed quietly.

"This won't end well for either of us. You know that?" She stated seriously this time.

I rolled carefully onto my side to face her. After a moment she did the same. We just watched each other quietly for minutes before I finally spoke.

"I know what it's like to feel that everything you do no longer has meaning." I whispered. She seemed to go very still. I took a breath to steady myself. "I know... despite what you say, I'm alive when I'm with you. I know it sounds mad but when I'm in Sector 1–I'm just going through the motions in black and white. There is nothing more. You absolutely infuriate me, make me hold a dagger to your throat—", she snorted at that, "—but I have never met anyone that has made me feel like you do." I finished with an exhale.

I had never exposed myself so wholly as I did just now. So when I watched her consider my words I felt every second that passed and wanted to know her every thought. She felt enough to break the space between us tonight. How much further did that go...

"Can you please say som—"

"Stop." She whispered.

My heart felt like it had just taken a twisted knife through it.

"How could I possibly deserve you after you confess that?" She murmured sadly.

Perhaps she does...

I wanted to admit all the ridiculous notions I had about her. How I knew the deadly facade was just that. That there was more to her. More sides. More contrasts. How else would a woman from the furthest sectors and the one from the highest coexist? How else would they dance between royalty and riches like they had all the time in the world.

"Why can't you accept that you are worth something?" I blurted.

"Because there is still so much about me that you don't know. You would run for the nearest craft right now if you knew it all." She stated with conviction.

I couldn't help it. I smirked at her in challenge.

"Try me, Scorpion." 

She went silent for a moment.

"Alex." She murmured. "My name is Alex."

I stared at her for a moment in awe. It seemed like I had just earned the right to her name. So far, I knew none that had...

"Alex." I confirm, loving the way it felt to finally have a real name. "Tell me everything."