Chapter 48

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Chapter 48

Jerome

       I really hated that I ended up hurting my wrist during that one challenge. If I didn't, I might have been able to beat Dirk, and Nolan could have beat him on the challenge that was supposed to happen today.

       The worst part was anyone could tell that Nolan wasn't feeling confident at all. Even Dirk noticed and he was constantly smirking in my and Nolan's direction, which only made Nolan feel even less confident.

       I lost count on how many times I wanted to slap the smirk off of Dirk's face. Or slap his face off his face.

       I didn't like his face, just in case you couldn't tell.

       Because there wasn't going to be a challenge today, Lucy thought it would be nice to have a barbecue since it was the last weekend we were going to be here. Once the last challenge ended on Monday, we were going to be heading home. Well, depending where we lived. For the people that flew out here, they were going to stay an extra day and catch a flight then.

       Since Nolan and I lived in Miami, we were going to be leaving shortly after the last challenge.

       I just really hoped Nolan would win otherwise we would never here the end of it from Dirk, and because I really wanted Nolan's confidence to boost up.

       After we had food on our plates, Nolan and I went to the hammock. We always sat there when we had the chance, and it was making me feel tempted to get one in our own backyard.

       Nolan was just eating his food quietly, and after a few minutes, I finally decided to give him a pep talk. "You know you're going to kick ass in the last challenge, right?" I asked.

       "I doubt it," Nolan muttered.

       "You are," I said. "You don't need the competitive spirit or the physical strength to do well. You just need to be confident in yourself."

       "Well, I don't feel confident at all," Nolan said. "And once I don't feel confident, there's no way I'll suddenly gain some."

       "That's not true," I said. "You are so confident at times, and quite frankly, I get jealous of how confident you can be."

       Nolan looked at me with furrowed eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

       "I mean every single thing you've done," I said. "I've always been a confident person. That's who I am, but you're not one by nature and the fact that you still gain confidence is so inspirational."

       Nolan snorted. "That's crap."

       "Oh, really?" I asked. "Tell me, are you afraid of what other people think about your sexuality?"

       "No," Nolan said. "Why would I?"

       "Because when we first started dating, you were," I said. "You didn't even want to go anyway public with me, but now you don't even care if we walking around public, holding hands. Or if we kiss in public. I'd say you gained a lot of confidence in regards of your sexuality."

       "So? That's one thing," Nolan said.

       "What about that poem you had to write for your creative writing class?" I asked. "The one that I read for you?"

       "That has nothing to do with my confidence," Nolan said.

       "Are you serious?" I asked. "You knew it was going to be read in front of people, and you talking about some pretty sensitive stuff; you struggling with your sexuality, eventually coming out, receiving all that backlash, your depression, your self harm. You didn't care if people knew that about you. Oh, and remember when you were paralyzed? You had so much confidence that you were going to get better and you did. All of that was a lot more important and a lot more difficult than some competition. I really think you're going to do amazing in the final challenge, because I have so much confident in you as well. All you need to do is channel even the slightest bit of confidence you had for all those difficult things you went through."

       "You really think I can do it?" Nolan asked.

       "Would I lie to you?" I asked.

       "Uh, yeah," Nolan said.

       "What?"

       "You said you were born in Lachine, you liar."

       "I....I never said I was born in Lachine. You just assumed I did because that was where I grew up."

       "You're still a liar."

       I just chuckled. "I'm serious, though. You are going to kick some serious ass in Monday's challenge."

       "Probably not. Lucy said it's going to have some sort of physicality in it."

       "Yeah, some," I said. "I'm guessing it will be a mix between a brain challenge and a physical challenge to bring out both your strengths."

       "Wasn't the challenge already planned though?"

       "I'm trying to make a point so you'll start to feel more confident. Do you?"

       "A bit, yeah, now that you have a lot of confidence in me."

       "Of course I do," I said. "You are probably the bravest and smartest person I know."

       Nolan smiled softly. "Thanks for that pep talk. I really needed it."

       "Anything for my husband."

       "Okay, we've been married for seven months. You don't have to keep emphasizing husband."

       "I can if I want to, because it shows how much I love you."

       "Well, I love you too," Nolan said. "Even though you can be very annoying at times."

       "What?" I asked. "I'm not that annoying."

       "You are and you know it," Nolan said.

       "Yeah, I totally am, but it's fun being annoying," I said.

       "I can see that," Nolan said. "I used to be a very annoying person, believe it or not."

       "Really?"

       "Yeah, really. Alan, Orchid, and I were the biggest pests ever. Ask Ryder. We loved bugging him. Us being annoying slowly started fading in our first year of high school. Well, me being annoying did. Not so much Alan, and a tiny bit of Orchid."

       "To be fair, Ryder is a very fun person to bug," I said.

       "Yeah, I can't argue with that," Nolan said. "I stopped bugging him when I came out to him, because he was the only person that was constantly asking if I was okay when I was trying to hide it, and he was the only one who actually tried talking me so I can tell him what's wrong. I still can't believe I cam out four years ago."

       "Yeah, same here," I said. "You know, before we came here for the show, I was talking to my dad. He told me he kind of always had a feeling I was gay, he just....didn't want to accept it. That's why his reaction was so harsh when I came out to my parents. He knew it really was a reality and he wasn't ready to accept it. I'm just glad he is now. And that he's dating an amazing woman who actually accepts me for me."

       "Imagine if your dad gets married to Mae's mom," Nolan said. "Ooh, then Elise can't keep telling Mae that she should dump Ryder for you. Although, she shouldn't anyways because you are very much gay."

       "Very," I said before kissing my husband's cheek. "It would be amazing if they got married, though. Chanel was the person who took me in when I had nowhere to go, and Mae was the first person I ever came out to. It would be so amazing to have them as my mom and sister."

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Two chapters left. :O

IMMA MISS JERLAN SO MUCH ASDFJKL; They will be in Rhys's book since Rhys and Kingsley are cousins and pretty much best friends, but they won't be fetus Jerlan. :( Just like how I wasn't writing about fetus Popson in Ryder's book.

OMG POPSON ARE GONNA BE GRANDPARENTS IN RHYS'S BOOK I CAN'T COMPUTE. Like, when Rhys talks about them, he'll be saying Grandma and Grandpa. I'M CRYING. THEY'LL BE 59 AND 58 TURNING 60 AND 59.

(and gene will still be alive because he's immortal)

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