I Gotta Kill the Prom Queen

Ch.22 "Lavender"

The robot girls sat in the back and I took shotgun while Mindi drove like Mario Andretti on crack across town. I was glad I'd been too upset to eat dinner because by now I'd be puking and vomit is a dead smell giveaway and never works for sneaking in and staying unnoticed.

While I changed my clothes into the all black murder uniform Mindi fiddled with the radio until she found a station playing old country.

"Really? This is your murder mojo music tonight? Country?"

I couldn't help being bitchy. I didn't want to be here, and I was doing my best to hold down the garlic breadstick I'd chewed in slow motion waiting for my mom to act like a human.

"Country music is scientifically proven to make you angry and impulsive." Mindy spat back

I wasn't sure where she got her data, robot girl
or not, it sounded insane. What I knew about country music involved dogs trucks, scorned lovers, cheaters, ohhhh, maybe she had something there. While I contemplated the ability of a banjo as a form of creating soldiers of rage, we pulled up to a small brick home in a run down neighborhood.

"This is Trinelle's neighborhood? Are you sure?"

I couldn't help gawking out the window.  This was ghetto scary. Images of Rottweilers and making meth in the kitchen swam into my imagination in a country fueled frenzy.

"I do my homework.  She's in the third house from the right, the one with the plastic flowers out front.  Let's do this!"

I walked numbly beside them as we made our way to the house. There was no way her parents were going to a charity event. She was POOR. Like people on the street holding signs for money poor.

"This isn't right. Seriously. Call Tiffani. Trinelle is a force of positive change and up for homecoming queen, there's no way she lives in a slum. She always looks terrific and I've never seen her not in designer clothes."

Mindi shushed me and we tiptoed to the back of the slanted run down house. She tried the screen door which opened with a squeak and within seconds we were inside. The television was blaring and an obese man in boxers with a dozen beer cans around his ankle sat in a dented up armchair that looked like it had molded to fit his shape.

Mindi took out her iPhone and snapped a pic as I looked for any picture evidence in the barren room. Nothing remotely spoke of home, family, or having kids.

Mindi silently strode down the hallway until she came to the last door. She fished in her pockets and removed a small bottle of spray, spritzing the carpeting and under the door before running. Unsure of what was happening I followed, noting the strong smell of lavender following us down the hall.

When we hit the sidewalk I could barely breathe but gave her a hard shove. "What the hell was that?  Death by freshening up the place?"

She handed me a rope and opened the back for of a new Audi parked on the street.

"She's allergic to Lavender. She should be out in about fifteen minutes when she's too stuffed to breathe. Then she'll head for home and you strangle her from behind. I wanted to empty the gas tank, that's how the urban legend goes--she's supposed to stop for gas, but I'm not putting gasoline in my mouth and you weren't around for set up. Get in!!"

My temper flared. Maybe it was the country music, but mostly I was just so damn tired of having no control over anything. 

"You get in. I'm not even supposed to be here tonight. Who lives there?"

Mindi crossed her arms in a power pose. Screw that. She could peacock all she wanted, I wasn't budging.

"Her bad boy boyfriend Chris Mayner. They've been on again off again since junior high. I'm guessing he must be really good at something for her to slum it so often.  Now get in. We did all the work this time- and the planning. It's your turn to pull your weight. Just text me when you're stopped and we will pick you up."

With that Mindi and the robot girls turned in unison and left me standing on the curb. I had no choice, I climbed into the backseat not even aware the rope was still in my hands.

When Trinelle got into the car the smell of Lavender overpowered everything. She sniffled and sneezed and cleared her throat making gagging noises that made me even more nauseous than Mindi's driving.

She took off going 70 down the side street without even turning on the headlights or buckling up. I could hear gasping noises and soon all I could think about was making the disgusting sounds stop. I wound the rope around my hands and just kept still.

I thought about just speaking, but I didn't want to freak her out. I decided when she stopped st a redlight or a stop sign I would loosely put the rope around her neck and explain what was happening. If she could hit me in the face hard enough, I could get out of this alive, and so could she.

The wheezing continued and the car sped up even more. I decided I couldn't wait any longer or the sounds of her mucous invasion and the overpowering smell of Lavender would kill me. I slowly got myself into a crouched position and held the rope at my own neck level. Just as I lifted my arms to loop it the car was filled with the sound of crushing metal and showering glass. As I flew backwards toward the rear window I cursed.

"Damn girl!  You look like hell!"

I tried to open my eyes but they refused. I was tied to a table and it felt like someone was digging holes in my face. I tried to squirm around and get untied when a hand smacked me on the forehead.

"Aria. It's Kiki. Calm down. You keep moving and this safety glass is gonna burrow in. Chika, you made a mess of yourself.  This is gonna take me a minute."

Kiki?  How was Kiki in the car?  I tried to lift my hand to take of the blindfold on my eyes but the ties on my wrists held steady.

Footsteps filtered into the room and everything else fell silent. The blindfold was yanked away and Tiffani stood over me in silk red pajamas with a scowl on her face.

"You really like to push the envelope don't you?  And my patience. Mindi says you had the easiest part of the whole job- just pulling a rope. And you choose a busy intersection??? With cameras?"

Her frown deepened and she waited. Nails tapping on the massage table I was tied to. I was disoriented and confused but could tell I was at Tiffani's. How I had gotten there was a mystery.

"Is she dead?"  Was all I managed to croak out.

Giggles from the robot girls came from behind me and Tiffani's eyebrows shot up in amusement. My heart thumped as I tried to remember if I'd actually put the rope around Trinelle's neck.

"Well, at least you do have some sense of obligation to the job. Yes, she's dead. Well, she might as well be. The girls left her where she flew, in the middle of the road and recovered you. If she isn't dead physically she is socially. The video was quite impressive. You're damn lucky my mothers slept with the almost every official in town or you would have gotten yourself and the girls arrested. Or worse.  Stop being a fuck up Aria."

With that she slapped the blindfold back on  and I could hear her heels clicking back out the door. Kiki sat back down to take what I assumed was window glass out of my face and hair. Each plunk of the bits of glass in the tin reminding me. Tiffani's reign would end tomorrow. Come hell or high water, disfigured face or broken limbs, Tiffani, the would be Prom Queen, would be dead. Either that, or I would.

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Hahahah I have to admit. I love how dramatic I was back then. This chapter was easy to remember. My face still has scars that look like I lost a fight with a blender. Kiki was a makeup and hair genius, but not the best at impromptu surgery.

On another note Darla died!! No! I didn't kill her Geesh, don't you understand this book at all? She wanted to be in the spring play the Wizard of Block D and thought she'd be a shoe in if she showed up as the tin guard. Turns out scraping the pipes for slivers of silver and glueing them to your face isn't good for you. Especially if they're made of lead!

Meanwhile, I'm sleeping alone until the pipes get fixed and the bed gets assigned to someone else. Sometimes life is surprisingly amazing.