Chapter 19

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Today was the second week of Kinky Boots, and I have to say, Brendon makes an amazing Charlie Price!

We just got back from a show, and I can tell that we were all exhausted.

I went to my bunk and was gonna post a random photo, without hazard. I posted it and went to the bathroom because I had to pee since the second act.

When I came back from my fun little bathroom adventure, I saw that I had many more comments and likes than usual, so I checked to see what the problem was.

Oh god...

I immediately deleted the video, but you know the Panic! fandom, when they get something new, it spreads like wildfire.

Brendon sent me that demo a couple days ago, it was for a new song on the album, and now, I accidentally posted it.

I walked into the lounge area, seeing Brendon on his phone, which didn't make me feel better one bit.

"Faelecia Marie Urie!" God, I hated when he used my full name.

"What the f**k is this?!" He was on Twitter and pointed his phone to me, showing me a video of the song demo.

"I, uh, accidentally posted it thinking it was something else..." I hesitated, looking down in the shame that it this situation.

"You accidentally posted it, huh?! Well, that makes this better! For f**ks sakes Faelecia! I gave you that because I thought you were able to be responsible and keep it to yourself, but apparently, you can't! I was gonna surprise the fans after the tour, but I can't because you've already done the job for me!" He yelled. It was even more embarrassing because everyone was in the lounge area. Like everyone, Dallon, Kenny, Dan, Zack, Sarah, Brendon and me.

"Okay! I'm sorry! I made a mistake, everyone does so, just chill a little bit!"

"God, can't you do anything right?! Man, sometimes I wish I never adopted you!" He yelled, causing the room to go silent. Brendon looked up and his hard expression turned into an apologetic one. Everything became blurry as I felt the hot tears run down my face. I ran away from the lounge area in full out tears.

I sat on the steps of the bus as I heard footsteps run towards me. I didn't know who it was, all I knew is that I didn't want it to be Brendon.

"Faelecia, you know he doesn't mean that, he just had an outburst." I heard Zack say.

"Then why did he f**king say it?! I knew that when he adopted me, he didn't want me, he was just stuck with me!" I heard all of them gasp. Then everything was silent, except for Dallon and Brendon bickering.

"What the hell Brendon?! She's your daughter and you say that to her?! You put your music before her first! That's not cool at all!" Dallon yelled, and it echoed through the bus.

"I know what happened Dallon! I didn't mean it, it slipped out!" He yelled back, making Dallon scoff loudly.

"That doesn't give you an excuse Brendon! You broke her heart! She's probably heart broken now! Not only did her father say that, but her idol said it to her! I wanna comfort her so bad right now, but no! I'm here knocking some common sense into you! You never do that to a fourteen-year-old!"

Zack turned the conversation back to us.

"Faelecia, he doesn't mean it!" He rubbed my back, and I felt Sarah rub it too.

"I don't care, he said it and that's all! Like I said, he was stuck with me at that stupid center! I just wanna go to bed and cry my eyes out!" I sobbed even more.

"Go apologize!" Dallon yelled.

"Alright!"

I heard his shoes clack over to where we were.

"Faele-"

"Brendon, I don't think she's ready to talk to you." Zack said, making him send out an 'oh' and sadly walk away.

I didn't look at him, I just knew him so well that I knew he did that.

"Here, let me take her to bed," Sarah said. I looked up and rubbed my tears away with my sweatshirt. She sent me a smile and that kinda cheered me up. She extended her hand and helped me up. We hugged each other briefly, and then she took me to my bunk.

"I love you, Sarah!" I said, making her smile. She kissed me and told me she wished I felt better, and a goodnight.

I tried falling asleep that night, but couldn't whatsoever.

Every negative thing that happened that night kept coming back to me, which made me feel like throwing up, which I went to the bathroom to do.

I walked slowly passed the lounge area, Brendon being there, but also being asleep since it was sometime in the AM's.

I snuck past him and threw up, having no one notice, which I kinda wanted. I heard footsteps come near and my stomach churned a little more, but it was fine because I was throwing up.

"Faelecia?" Dallon's voice was silent. I finished my little moment and looked at him. He seemed like he was sorry, yet he didn't do anything.

"I-I was just, feeling a little sick..." I said, getting up and quickly brushing my teeth to get the acid out.

I ran up to Dallon and hugged him, automatically crying.

"I-I'm sorry, I just can't help it!" I cried into his chest. He rubbed my back and placed his chin on my head, applying just a little bit of pressure.

"I'm so sorry for his behavior. He means well, he just had a mistake." He whispered, trying to make sure we didn't wake anyone.

"You're my daughter away from Amelie and Knox, and when he said all those things, I almost snapped. No one should talk to you like that!" He said, rubbing my back. I broke the hug and looked at him.

"I heard all the things you were saying to him, it felt really nice!" I smiled, making him smile.

"Do you think you and Brendon will be okay tomorrow?" He asked.

"I don't think I'll be okay at all."

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