Arranged To Be His (Undergoing Rewrites)

6. Decisions That Change.

April's POV:
6 months later:
My dad revoked his decision, of getting me married a month later. I wouldn't budge, I wouldn't go down without a fight. I wouldn't marry a guy I wasn't sure I loved, much less want to be trapped in a loveless marriage. Like any other girl, I dreamed of marrying the one I loved and the one that loved me. It was ruthless, cruel, my fate shifted against my will.
This was cruel,I could make my own decisions. Any girl my age should right? I'm an adult. Maybe I could run away. Yes I could. But then again I didn't want to. I would run, but my heart would be here. I couldn't bear to cause my family pain, when they loved me so much. I would to anything for them. Maybe this is what sacrifice means. To do something that makes you question your judgement, but you do it anyway, just to see the one you love happy. Against all odds.

But you think I would hate Alex right? I try. Hard. But it's just not  enough.  The more I push myself away, the more I'm drawn every single time. Other than that conversation,I didn't hear anymore. Just a simple promise of him, waiting for as long as it takes. I tried everything. I pressurised him to break the commitment, but he persevered. How can he wait? How can he hold on forever, without being tempted to let go?
But why was I holding back? Was I scared? Hell yes. I was petrified. Here I stood an 18 year old while others were free, to make their choices, I had the hardest decision, on which my tomorrows depended.

I thought back. On everything, piecing things together bit by bit. Hopefully I was sensible and strong headed, to choose well enough. The things that stood out were Alex's eyes, those piercing blue eyes ,that had emotions stirring inside them. The strong gaze that hounded me, the first time we met. The pleading, sorrowful eyes, that looked at me concerned as I left. The conversation that reminded me, how much he loves me and he assured me things would be better.
Truth is, I was tired of fighting, of resisting something that was slipping out of my control, or rather I had no control over.
I wanted to give it. To let go. I wanted to live my life on my own terms, yet I wanted  to see where my choices would take me.

"Give me a chance. Give us a chance."
I wanted to. To see what the future held. Him and me together. A future that seemed ours. I could see my self falling. The more I resisted, with everything in me, the more I fell slipping out of my resistance, slipping out of the facade.

'I would love you forever.' Was the promise his eyes held, he did not speak the words, but his eyes they spoke volumes, which our lips couldn't which our minds couldn't comprehend, but our hearts in sync.
And I knew what I wanted:
After months of despair I knew:
I would give us a chance, with hope for the future no matter, how hard things would get. I would fall.

I was already falling in love.
In love with Alexander Dylan Reed...