TRIGGER WARNING: May contain content linked to depression, existentialism, self-harm, suicide and suicidal thoughts. If you are struggling with depression, just know that it will get better, even if you don't think so.
"Wow," You breathed, taking in...
You slowly opened your eyes which were still adjusting to the light. You weren't in your bed. It smelled different. The ceiling was plain white and not the familiar light grey colour. You could hear a heart monitor beeping and as you became more aware of where you were, you noticed the many wires and tubes attached to your body. Each wire that draped over the hospital bed sheets was hooked up to a complicated looking machine. Suddenly, the door opened ever-so-slightly and what you could only assume was a nurse poked her head in. She then murmured something to someone behind her, but you couldn't tell what she was saying or who to. Then, all of a sudden you realised. There were two supposed visitors. One had a burst of bright yellow hair and the other had a beanie on. But, then you seemed to notice someone else behind them.
"(Y/N), you're alive, thank god." Josh's voice was shaky with concern and tears as he tried his best to hug you with all the wires and tubes surrounding you. "Don't do that again. You scared us!" Tyler also did his best to embrace your weak form too. "Why the hell did you think jumping in front of a moving car like that was a good idea?" Wait, they knew? How? Surely they weren't watching. If they had seen you then they would've at least called your name or pulled you back. You decided to question them.
"H-How did you know that's what I did?" But then, a knock was heard on the door. A young-looking girl appeared.
(A/N: I went onto one of those crappy avatar makers to make the look I was going for so here-)
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
"You're awake?" Her voice was also laced with concern. You could tell by her clothing that she didn't work at the hospital, but you also didn't recognise her at all. Why was she here? "Oh, good. Sorry, you may not know me. I was in the passenger seat of the taxi that hit you. I got out to see if you were okay and decided to call someone on your phone. I ended up calling your friends here and they helped me take you to the hospital." You could only stare on in awe. You didn't know what to think. "If you don't mind, I'd like to get to know you. I recognise your friends. I really like their music. You're lucky to have them." You forced a smile despite the fact that you were bedridden in a hospital and you had likely completely shattered some of your bones. "Thank you. U-Um... The name's (Y/N)." "(Y/N)? That's a nice name. I'm Phoenix." You took a moment to glance back at Tyler and Josh, who were looking on with calm, peaceful expressions. You could tell by them that this Phoenix girl was nothing to be afraid of. "Um, may I ask... Why did you throw yourself under the car like that? Are you just a daredevil, or...?" A pang of guilt tugged at your heart. Holding back tears, you tried to form words of some sort to explain the best you could.
"I..." She looked with a reassuring smile, listening intently. "Well, it all started with a migraine." Not sure of how to continue, you tried to use lyrics. "The pain ranged from up, down and sideways. Painful. I get them often, especially after nights where there's a voice telling me I should die already. It cares what I think. I tried to seek medical advice once, but they just filed it as a crazy suicidal head case and I was left to fend for myself. I was at school, didn't do so well. Then Josh caught my attention and asked me if I was okay. I was dying and trying, but I said I was fine. I was lying of course, so very far from fine." You continued to explain the story as well as you could, song lyrics helping you along the way. From when you broke your nose, to Tyler rolling up your sleeves to reveal the torture you put yourself through, to spending all your time with them, listening to them perform for you, to them going on tour, and how you called them whenever you could just to laugh as they both tried to grab the phone and talk to you, to the voice that returned after the tour. "...Until then, I jumped out in front of your taxi cab. I figured that to stay alive I'd have to kill my mind, so I tried."
Phoenix stood motionless, taking in your story. While you were talking, Tyler and Josh had walked up to the side of your bed. They both looked on the verge of tears. They all stood in a comfortable silence until finally, Phoenix spoke up. "Friend, please." She paused. "You're important to your friends. Think of them. Think of me, I care about you. Don't use a permanent solution to a temporary problem. It might sound weird coming from someone you've only known for 5 minutes, but you're important to me. You're beautiful, you know that right? Do you understand?" Of course you didn't. You were still taking a while to process what was happening. You nodded your head the best you could with all the wires and tubes surrounding you. Phoenix smiled.
Fast forward a few days, and you were starting to get better. The doctors attempted to talk to you about getting help, but you insisted your friends were all you needed. You could walk again, but your doctor said that you'd need someone supervising you just in case you fall. You looked over at the two boys, wondering if they could help. "Actually, (Y/N)," Tyler held your hand securely, Josh holding the other, as they both helped you into their car. "You could live with us. Wouldn't that be fun?" Your face immediately lightened up at that idea. Your week long hospital stay had left you with messy hair and a tired, pale face so it felt nice to experience some joy for once. "Yeah!" Josh piped up. "You can stay with us for the night while we help bring your things over. We have a spare room and you can do whatever you want with it." You smiled for the first time in weeks. "That sounds like a great idea."
When you got back to their place, you pulled out your phone to see a text from an unknown number. "Hello, this is Phoenix :) We can chat here if you want. I hope you're ok x" You saved the number into a new contact and replied. "Hey! Yeah, I'm doing okay now. I get to stay with Tyler and Josh because I still need to get used to walking. I hope you're doing good ^^ Let's talk often."
I'm not sure how long I'll be keeping Phoenix in there but let's just see what happens :3 This was the chapter I said I'd finish a few days after the last one but ehh, at least it's up now~
