Cynister

21

So sorry it took so long I literally had to clean the whole house but enjoy!!

Cyn pov

Yesterday after we had our little conversation Jessi called in and scheduled me a doctors appointment which we are at currently and obviously I didn't want to be here

"Cyn this is the exact reason you are here remember why we're here, so you can get your son right?" She was right I needed to calm down its all for my son....all for my son I took a deep breath and counted to ten something Jessi told me I should start trying when I'm angry

"You good now?" She asked

"Yea just ready to get this over with" I had to keep telling myself that it was all for my baby boy Amir because the doctor is taking to long and my patients is slowly thinning

"Cynthia Santana" finally the doctor called and we went to the back

" so what seems to be the problem here?"

"We came to find out why she's constantly switching personalities and she said that she keeps having nightmares about her past"

"Ok I have a few questions. To start off have you tried to commit suicide of do self harm in any way?"

"Yes"

"When was the last time you did so?"

"Yesterday"

"Ok do you often feel sad, depressed, or empty?"

"Yes 90 percent of the time"

"And when you switch personalities what do you feel?"

"Anger, anxiety, general discontent, guilt, loneliness, mood swings, and sadness

"Ok and psychological wise do you experience depression, distorted self-image, grandiosity, or narcissism?"

"Yes everything but narcissism I have very little love for myself"

"Ok do you also experience insomnia or nightmares, emotional detachment or unwanted thoughts?"

"Recently I've had them every night"

"Well miss Santana it seems you have a rare case of PTSD and BPD which are Post traumatic stress disorder and Borderline personality disorder which causes you to act and feel this way"

"Is there any way to cure these diagnoses?" Jessi asked

"Both can be treated by therapy"

"Well its something we'll have to consider"

"That's fine and a few tips to help fasten up the process is when ever or whatever your feeling always express it even if its to yourself always express your thoughts and feelings" he spoke to me directly then looked at Jessie

"And as for you try and get her out of the house and keep her mind occupied because when your alone your mind wonders which brings back things and always just take the time out to listen to her even if its about her nail color just listen to her and be there for her" we took everything he said in this is the beginning of a new chapter for me and I'm tired of living this way I want better for my self and my baby so I'm ready for change.....

This is her new beginning!

Cyn's growing and opening up

Will this work?

Kisses
Goddezz....