The Ravaging

Chapter Thirty

"Alden," someone says from behind me, startling me out of the light doze I had been in. That old adage of sleeping when baby sleeps is something I have taken to heart. Who knew children could be so exhausting.

"Yeah," I say, voice coming out more as a croak as I push myself up so that I am sitting, rather than laying sprawled across the couch. When I see who it is who is talking, though, my eyes widen considerably.

Mary walks over to me, sitting on the other end of the couch, her foot tucked underneath her. Her stomach is definitely more pronounced. Alena has been keeping close track of her growth and progress. According to her, Mary is right on track, maybe even a little further along than her previous assumption of twenty-eight weeks.

"Could I talk to you for a minute?" Her voice is soft, and it is one of the few times I have ever heard it. Most of the time, she is quiet, not speaking to anyone other than Margaret. Alena always just asks her yes or no questions, that way she can just shake or nod her head in response. Suffice to say, it takes me a few seconds to get over my initial shock.

"Yeah, of course." Her face is as neutral as always, but her lips twitch as she watches me fumble to pull myself up. "What's up?"

She seems to be mulling over her words, before she eventually talks as if it is hard for her to find the correct ones. "Margaret said that I should talk to you and Finn about..." she pauses for a second, her eyebrows furrowing in discontent, "about the- the baby."

Her words catch me off guard slightly, but I give her a quick nod once they register, forcing myself to wake up.

She seems to take my nod as encouragement. "I-I don't want to be a mom. Never have, probably never will." Her eyes flick up to me and being this close to her, I can see that they are a dark blue, almost like a navy color. They fit her. "But I don't want them to be without a parent."

"Finn and I have talked, and if you don't want the baby, we would love to take them," I say, my words coming out more encouraging than I truly feel about the whole ordeal. But, there is not any other option. Mary has never wanted this baby, was forced into it just like Finn was, and she should not have to take care of someone she doesn't love. Finn and I have raised Viola since birth, and now she is crawling. If we have managed to keep her alive this long, then we should be able to handle another child.

And for the first time in the months that I have known her, she allows herself to smile. Her eyes are still sad, though, and I doubt the sadness will ever leave her. But, for once in her life, she has control over something. Her relief is evident in the way she allows herself to relax, body not as tense as she usually holds herself.

"This might seem weird to say, but thank you," she whispers, before pushing herself up off the couch and walking back in the direction of her room.

It is nice to see that she seems to be getting better, albeit rather slowly. But, her wife dying sent her into a tailspin, and then being kidnapped and forced into a pregnancy, it is no wonder she is having trouble. It seems that having some control in her life is allowing her to come back to herself, heal from the damage her heart has undergone.

Despite still being tired, I push myself up from the couch, rubbing at my eyes as I wander into the kitchen. The conversation is still looping in my mind, and the worry starts to grow. Adding another member to our family is stressful, especially since we can't just run to the store if we are short on supplies.

Everyone here has been pretty helpful, thank god. Ever since some of the guards were kicked out a couple of weeks ago, the entire community here has flourished. It seems as if everyone has taken a collective sigh of relief, able to actually enjoy life again instead of living constantly on edge.