[First Draft] Crystals (girlxgirl) (studentxteacher) (lesbian story)

Chapter Thirty-four

A/n: feel free to hunt me down and kill me if you want, I haven't updated in forever and I'm sorry... I'm just so busy nowadays... Anyway I hope you all like it...

Laura

I was freaking out. I tried to hide it from Lilly but I think she could tell. I didn't want to leave her alone so I waited until a nurse came to check on her before quickly slipping outside.

I stood just outside the door and breathed out slowly. I felt trapped and panicked and as though everything was spiralling out of my control. I tried to keep myself together as I half ran through the hospital, seeking the exit.

I burst through the doors and out into the sea of parked cars. My heart rate instantly began to slow as I breathed in the cold air.

There weren't many people outside, so it was mostly quiet. I moved away from the entrance and over to where some plants lined the outside of the hospital - planted there in some attempt to make it seem cheerful.

I stood completely still and just breathed, letting my mind slowly empty until only one thought remained.

"Lilly must hate me."

Saying it out loud only made it sound even more probable. It would kill me if she left now, over something like this - something I hadn't intended to happen.

I began to freak out again and tried to push the thought away, but it stuck at the front of my brain.

If our roles were reversed I'd hate Lilly. That was the thing that was eating me up the most. I wouldn't let her explain, so what was to say Lilly would allow me to.

She was rather more calm than I, but I couldn't see how she could listen to me while thinking I was cheating on her. I was certain there weren't many people who could.

There was a small beacon of hope however. She'd listened to me in the hospital, she hadn't lashed out at me or screamed all the curses she knew at me... but maybe that was worse. Maybe she just didn't care, and that was why she was so contained.

No, that couldn't be it. I'd seen how angry she was, hell she even fought Caitlin, even though she was bound to lose. So it must be something else.

Maybe she just didn't want to make a scene. I knew she got embarrassed easily but would that really stop her containing her anger? Was that enough?

I breathed in deeply. I just had to tell her. That was the only thing I could do. Hopefully she would believe me. If she didn't... I didn't want to think about that.

I brushed my hair from my face and took one last breath of calming air before going back inside.

The nurse had gone and Lilly was alone. She was staring up at the ceiling, her fingers tapping against each other as she thought. I wondered what she was thinking but didn't ask. It probably wasn't good.

"Hey," I said softly, moving over to sit on the chair that had been placed beside her bed.

"Hey," she replied, not even looking at me.

"What did the doctor say?"

"The scan looks good, I've not got any brain damage or blood clots."

"Thank god," I said, releasing a heavy sigh. At least that was one problem I no longer had to worry about.

She didn't say anything. I want sure if she was just upset with me or was still in pain and too stubborn to admit it.

"Are you okay now? Does anything hurt?"

She didn't reply, and I wondered if she was ignoring me. I stood up so I was within her line of sight but her eyes were closed and her breathing deep and steady. She'd fallen asleep.