Chapter 23

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The ceremony was brief and intensely uncomfortable for me. Starscream had explained how bonding was done with the 'Cons- it was an exceedingly private affair, the two Cybertronians would leave the base and go far away, they would be gone a whole cycle so no one knew which day they were bonded on, keeping it private. It was different with the Autobots, they had a full ceremony, with witnesses. 'Hide understood my reluctance, and so we compromised- we would have the ceremony, but not bond until later, and tell no one.

My closest family- my dad and uncles as well as Jazz and Bee were there, with Ratchet officiating, reciting ancient words by memory.
"Is it true that you come here of your own free will and accord?" He asked me
"Yes, it is true"
"With whom do you come and whose blessings accompany you?"
"She comes with me, Optimus Prime- brother of her carrier, and is accompanied by all of her family's blessings"

"The spark that Primus has bestowed upon you is gift- given freely and without payment, as is your love for one another. Despite your spark being self contained it has a place aside to join to another's- a coupling to form the most sacred of bonds- the Spark bond. Shadowfire and Ironhide have chosen each other as their sparkmate, they have both chosen a parter skilled in combat, proficient in battle, able to defend both themselves and their partner, willing to give their lives to the defence of" here the original words had to be changed- substituting 'their fellow Autobots' for 'Cybertron' "A sacred bond is something that must be cherished every cycle. Love and comfort one another, give the other understanding and support as you go through life together, as one unit. Be as one, yet maintain yourself, still be Shadowfire and Ironhide- be who the other has learned to love"
"Ironhide, I have not the right to bind you to Shadow, only you have that right. If it is your wish, say so at this time and open the outer casing of your chest plate"

"It is my wish" Hide said fervently servos working the catches of his chest plate and wrenching his protective armour aside.

"Shadowfire, if it is your wish for Ironhide to be bound to you, remove the inner lining of his chest plate"

I reached out, tracing the sensitive wiring on display as my servos found the latch keeping Hide's spark shielded from the world. A shudder wracked his frame as I slid my servos under the final casing before prying it skyward. I took a step back, hands falling to my sides, already dreading what must come next.

"Shadowfire, I have not the right to bind you to Hide, only you have that right. If it is your wish, say so at this time and open the outer casing of your chest plate"

My arms moved as if on their own volition, raising my servos to my chest plate. I didn't want to do this, it felt wrong- baring myself to the world this way, rendering myself so vulnerable.

"It is my wish" I intoned, fighting the urge to slam my armour shut and activate my canons defensively.

"Ironhide, if it is your wish for Shadowfire to be bound to you, remove the inner lining of her chest plate" Surprisingly, I didn't feel revolted as my innermost circuitry was lovingly caressed- it was a pleasurable sensation, marred only by the optics I knew were trained on the scene, not to mention the human eyes. It was the human equivalent of interfacing in front of your family, absolutely repugnant to me, yet seemingly normal to the rest of the 'Bots.

"May your union be long and happy- Primus guide you" Ratchet said, bowing to us.

"May Primus guide you" the assembled 'Bots intoned, before all six interlopers retreated.

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Optimus had tried to explain before the ceremony, but it had come off as awkward and fragmented, so I had gotten most of my practical knowledge on the subject of interfacing from Screamer and the rest of the 'Cons back when I was with them. My sire had caught them telling his sparkling about the practicalities of 'facing, as they called it, and tanned their hides for it, before giving me a proper explanation- with less graphic details and absolutely no video feed. He had explained the spark bond to me as it had been explained to him on Cybertron, for he had never had a sparkmate himself.

"When Sparks touch, they swell and melt together, the energy fields of two cybertronians mesh and become one. At the moment of overload they transmit emotions, and even some memories, in a trade of selves. It is a union of two sparks that create one being, not just in the eyes of Primus, but in your innermost self. Once the bond is complete and sealed after interfacing, both cybertronians are able to sense their partner's emotions"

"Human culture exchanges rings, we exchange souls"

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"Again" Ratchet ordered, and I growled under my breath, picking myself up from the dirt and facing up to Optimus once more. This was ridiculous, there was no way I'd ever be able to beat Optimus in single combat- he was too good, a Prime, leader of the Autobots. But 'Hide was off to the side, watching, and I wanted to impress him. Optimus moved until he was behind me, out of my sight line, and I didn't turn to face him, knowing the point of this exercise. I focused on my audio receptors, putting more power into them and ignoring the visual input, hearing Optimus' fist fly towards me. I tried to move but I was too slow, and the blow connected with my shoulder with a crunch. Someone winched, and I pushed the pain away, anxious for the first time. Maybe Optimus would actually hurt her/me, maybe I should do something...

I frowned, shaking the strange thoughts from my head, what was that? I was drawn back to what was happening as Optimus lunged at me, a bolt of panic sending me into a low crouch as his servo flew over the space where my helm was a moment ago. Deciding to ignore whatever was going on and focus on the fight I lunched at the Autobot leader, who evaded with ease. I came at him again, and once again he dodged nimbly out of the way, but I was expecting it this time, and he stumbled over my extended pede. He caught himself before he fell and turned to face me, but I hadn't wasted my chance. From my new position beside the mech I darted in, delivered two sharp jabs to his chassis, and retreated. I knew from experience that when I was fighting older, stronger, and much more experienced mechs I couldn't let them get a grip on me, I had to stay out of their range, never in one place for long, but that I couldn't wear them down- they had much more endurance than I did. I had to get in and out and take him down as soon as I could. We traded blows, me staggering under the weight of Optimus' punches whenever I failed to get out of the way fast enough. Soon my chance came, Optimus shot a distracted look towards Ratchet and Ironhide, clearly having been waiting for something to happen, and I darted in, attempting to sweep his legs from under him; though I managed to make one massive limb begin to buckle he quickly realised what I was doing, and threw me off. I landed on the hard ground with a thud, sending a puff of dust up into the air as I groaned, feeling a dull throbbing in my chassis that was echoed in Ironhide's.

Ratchet drew Optimus aside as 'Hide came over to me, the perfect mask of calm.
"You alright?" He asked, extending a servo to help me to my feet. I ignored it and shoved myself up roughly, feeling a pang of hurt and an answering swell of guilt. I headed over to the two mechs engaged in hushed conversation.

"This isn't working, we have to try something else" Ratchet opened his mouth to suggest something but I had had enough.
"What in Primus' name-"

But Optimus caught Ratchet's eye, the medic nodded, and then the mech was advancing on me.
"Do not question me femme, I am a Prime, I am your leader, obey me" whatever role Optimus was playing triggered something inside me, internal programming that urged me to bend to his will; but I was the sparkling of Megatron, I was part Prime, and I would not cover before this Prime, or any other.

Behind me, 'Hide began to advance on his leader, resisting the subconscious programming, urged on by my feelings. Ratchet moved, backing up his friend. I tried to calm down, to keep a clear head, but now 'Hide's anger was coming back to me, our mirrored emotions creating a loop we couldn't escape.

I don't know who made the first move, but suddenly we were fighting, Ratchet dodging 'Hide's blows as I grappled with my uncle. Distantly, there were shouts, and humans and bots alike crowded around. Ratchet and Optimus worked us into a corner, raining blows down onto us as we tried to fight back, somehow managing not to get in each other's way.

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Later the two mechs explained everything to us, the effects of the bond, and our inability to deal with the feedback loop. My ability to resist Optimus' order was surprising, but not entirely unexpected. Throughout it all Sentinel watched and said nothing.

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