The Three Struggling Muslimahs

25

Ramadhan had come to an end all too soon for Rayhannah. She was on the phone with Khawla who apparently had been dragged by Muhammad to Khaltu Iman's place.

"Its so weird wallahy. The house is toooooo big for two people. I keep telling Muhammad I wanna go back home but he goes like, just a minute Khawla. Just a minute. IT'S BEEN TWO HOURS!"

"Ouch! My ears! And just hold on. I mean its Muhammad. Stay, at the very least for him. Okay love?"

"You're just saying that because you love him in that weird way."

"Hahahahaha! What weird way? You mean like the way YOU like MY brother!?"

"Okaaay! I'll stay."
Rayhannah thought she heard Muhammad's voice on the other end of the line. And she was right, because a few moments later Khawla spoke up and said," My dimwit brother says hi. And he wishes you an Eid Mubarak. Stop smiling Rayhannah! And don't ask me how I know. I'm psychic!"

"Okay habibty, I have to say bye now. The guests are arriving. And I'm the one preparing everything so I'll see you sometime soon!?"

"In Shaa Allah! Love you. Bye"

"Love you too. Bye."

Muhammad had already wished Rayhannah an Eid Mubarak earlier that morning but she hadn't texted him back. She reread the message all over again.

From: Qalby
Assalamu Aleikum Rayhannah. This ramadhan was an amazing one wallahy. From day one! I don't wanna go into details because I'm sure I wouldn't stop texting but I just wanna say shukraan for being part of my Ramadhan and for letting me be a part of yours. So today is eid and I cannot even begin to tell you how much I'll miss classes with you and the girls. It felt like we were in our own little world. Anyway, I pray that your duahs are answered and that your fast was accepted. Eid Mubarak Rayhannah 🌹

Meanwhile, an uncomfortable Khawla was sitting at the dinner table that seemed too grand and out of place with her brother and Miss Iman, as she called her. It wasn't that she was judging but there was something about Iman that didn't sit right with her.

"So. Khawla, are you ready for the national exams? I know my son is." Iman said with a smile on her face.

"Ummm... I guess so. Yeah."

"What do you mean you guess so!? My sister is as ready as she could possibly be. I mean c'mon. Look at her! She emanates wisdom wallah."

"Hahaha! Light on the tongue I see. I taught you well my brother. I taught you well."

A strong kind of jealousy overcame Iman's heart as she looked at the two siblings laughing away. 'This is exactly why I didn't want Muhammad anywhere near this part of the family. He's barely listening to me nowadays, I don't know his schedule or what he plans to do. Nothing. This eid was supposed to be time for him and I but he had to bring his sister along.' Iman thought to herself.

"Umm... Muhammad, your phone!" Khawla said and just by the smile that overcame his face she knew a hundred and one percent that Rayhannah had texted. "Tone the smile down a notch!"

"Hahahahahaha leave me alone Khawla!"

From:Hayaty
Waaleikum Salaaaaaaaaaaaam Muhammad. I knooooow. Allah! It seems like its flown past Subhanallah. I'll miss class too. Those girls have become a big part of my life now and so have you - honestly speaking. I really appreciate the duahs and I pray for that and soooo much more for you. You deserve true happiness. So ummm yeah! Ummm Eid Mubarak and say hi to Khaltu Iman for me. And take care of my little princess. Maasalam 🌹

"Earth to Muhammad!"

"Khawlaaaaaaaaa! Shuuush! I'm trying to concentrate."

"On what exactly!? Autocorrect?"

"Ha! Ha! Ha! Very funny."

After what seemed like an eternity to Khawla, they got up and left for Rayhannah's place. On their way there, Rayhannah called.

"Muhammad I'm doing you a favor but you have to stop the car and keep quiet. Promise?" He agreed, not sure what he was accepting. She received the call and put it on speaker.

"Assalamu Aleikum habibty. Miss me much?"

"Hahaha Waaleikum Salaaaaaaaam. Khawlaaaaaaaaaa. I'm dead!"

"Hahahahahahaha! What did my brother do now?"

"Okay first of all its not supposed to be that obvious but you're you so I'll let you slide off with this one. But wallahy Khawla I don't think this is normal. I love him so much. Sometimes I think too much. I don't know. He's just perfect. I mean I know you don't see him the way I see him but wallahy Khawla I don't think I will ever be able to see any other man in this world the way I see him. And people may say this is premature but it's not. You know how long I've been praying for this right? You know how long I've struggled with my feelings for him. You understand. And I know that he's your brother and its weird to hear all this but I needed to tell you this." Muhammad was literally in tears. His handkerchief was soaked but he battled to keep his voice low.

"Noooo. Its not weird wallahy and I get you."

"Wallahy Khawla I want to tell hiiiiiiim. I wanna tell him that he means more to me than all this world could offer. I wanna tell him that I have been praying for him as my significant other. I wanna tell him that I'm striving to be a beter muslimah not only for Allah but also so that I can be worth him wallahy. But I can't."

"Why can't you?"

"Because maybe he isn't ready for this you know. I don't wanna burden him with all of this."

"And what if he is?"

"Then it would kill me in the most beautiful way wallahy. He gets strength from me but wallahy I feel so weak the moment I think about this. Its like all my energy just vaporizes."

"Now I'm going to tell you this although I'm also so sure it's not for the last time because you enjoy over thinking and doubting yourself stupid woman. You are strong! Stronger than you give yourself credit for. Think about it this way. If I was you, I would have crumbled from the moment I knew that I had feelings for Muhammad but you didn't. Yuck! But anyway, you kept it in and you held on until the moment you were a hundred and one percent sure that it was reciprocated THEN you now wanna tell him. FAM! That's amazing. You are strong enough to withstand all the haraam going on in this messed up world instead you are practicing your deen. If you can ignore this world at a time like this. What makes you think you can't enjoin in halaal love and be successful. Listen here woman. You are not alone in this. I am here for you through out but most importantly Allah and Muhammad are with you too. That's all you need. And I am repeating. YOU ARE ONE OF THE STRONGEST PEOPLE I KNOW."

"Can you just come over please!"

"Yeah! On my way right now!" And she hung up. At that exact moment, Muhammad rested his head on Khawla's legs and cried his heart out. "Wallahy Khawla I feel that and more. Wallahy I want to tell her too. You have no idea."

"Let it all out Habib. Its okay. Allah is seeing your struggle and He will repay you for it. Don't stress Habib."

To see her brother cry like that broke her. "Come over to this side and I'll drive okay?" He nodded.

In no time, they were at the Nagib's and Khawla was taking two steps at a time to get to Rayhannah. And just as she had guessed, her friend was beyond tears curled up on her muswalah and all she could say was, "Wallahy silent love hurts."

Author's note:
I literally have nothing to say. Stay blessed 🌸